Man angry at mom when she excludes his GF and her kids from 'weird' x-mas tradition.
"AITA for calling out my mom after she excluded my girlfriend and the kids from our x-mas tradition?"
I've (m23) been dating my girlfriend Ellie (f31) for almost a year. Ellie has 2 kids (f6, m4) and we get along really well.
I have a big family and it's pretty much impossible to have one Christmas event and expect everyone to make it, so my parents host their celebration the week before. My mom has a weird tradition with the 'kids' (us) where she gives mini snow globes. It's very unique to her and it's sweet.
The event was last Saturday, and as usual mom pulled us aside and gave us this year's snow globes.
Now the snow globe giving extends to partners and I was expecting Ellie and the kids to receive one. My brother's wife Jane (f27-28) was there and mom gave her and her 5 yo daughter snow globes.
Mom's reasoning is that she doesn't know Ellie well enough to be included, but I said being my partner should be enough and she should've at least included the kids. Ellie came to the event with me and she was upset when she saw mom didn't get one for her or the kids.
I got kind of annoyed and told mom she gets snow globes for Jane and her daughter, considering my brother wasn't her son (we're half brothers). If that's the case then she's excluding Ellie for no reason.
Mom got defensive and started getting mad, and we ended up leaving early.
I just don't think what mom did was right, these aren't expensive and she could've got 3 more so Ellie and the kids could be included. I'd get if it was just for us, but she gets them for partners and kids too.
I got a few texts later from my sister, saying I'm creating issues and we disrespected my parents and Jane, and should apologize. AITA?
Let's find out.
ahavasavara writes:
YTA. Your mom doesn't draw the line the same place you do. Her children and their spouses and her grandchildren get globes. Dating partners do not.
Should've asked mom before the event who she was planning on including.
yodacat78 writes:
NTA. But this is all weird. Considering he’s only 23… suddenly taking on the roll of a parent to a 31 year old woman’s kids…. Yeah. His brain isn’t even fully developed and makes me question what’s up with her going after someone so young.
Seems manipulative and predatory on her part going for someone so much younger IMO- like I don’t know the details, but usually it’s a warning sign when someone in their thirties goes after someone under 25.
I’m 27 and I couldn’t imagine dating a 23 year old. They just look too young. 24 maybe but even then I’d feel sort of weird because of the brain development thing. And trust me- I certainly know I was not at the same level of maturity as I am now at that age .