So, when a Reddit user asked parents, 'what was your 'I raised an idiot' moment?' people were ready to share the funniest time they looked at their kid and thought 'do you have a brain?'
I used to tell my kids not to take off their shoes and socks in the car, especially on short trips. Just leave them on so that we don't have to spend 5 minutes finding and putting them back on before we run into the store.
Imagine a single dad with two young kids running around the car trying to re-shoe my children in the grocery store parking lot in the middle of an Arizona summer, yuck.
One day we went to the store and my daughter was missing her shoe. It was nowhere to be found. 'Daddy, I didn't want you to be mad that my shoe was off so I threw it out the window.' Made sense to a 5-year old I guess. - Qlinkenstein
When one of my daughters tries to insult the other by telling her how ugly she is. They’re identical twins. - AsBigAsAlone
Daughter calls me 'there is a cop behind me with his lights on. What should I do?' - whatreasondoineed
Told my kid that carrots help you see in the dark, he then went into the basement with a carrot and started waving it around like a flashlight. - retardedsquirrl
My son came to our house to visit (he didn't live with us), we weren't home but we on our way home so he let himself in. We walk in and he's freaking out about breaking our newly adopted cat or something to that effect.
I asked him what was she doing, she looked fine to me. He said she was 'vibrating' when she sat on his lap. This is where he learned about cats purring. He hadn't been around a lot of cats so idk. - wydidk
We need to leave; sent him to put on socks...Waited more than enough, go find him. He's in his room, wearing only underwear, playing with legos. He can't remember what I sent him after - 5up3rj
My 13 year old son was sniffing really hard and moving his head all around the area he was standing in. Slightly concerned he had lost his mind, I asked him what he was doing. He told me, 'I farted. I'm trying to smell it all up, so you dont have to smell it.' He's a thoughtful idiot. - rjonesjcm33
My 14 yr old soon went into a dressing room to try on 5 pairs of pants. After waiting 15 min and yelling twice into the men’s dressing room to see if was ok, he admitted he could find the shorts he had worn in.
He gave me 3 pairs of the pants and still couldn’t find them. I finally had to go into the stall to look. They were balled up in the leg of one of the pair of pants. It was extremely noticeable.
He swore he took his shorts off before trying on any of the pants so he didn’t think to look in them. I was speechless. He’s in the gifted and talented program in our school district. - hillarysp
I had my sister text my mom that she forgot her phone at home - pigboat3
He knew there was a frozen pizza in the garage but couldn't find it. Didn't even think to check the freezer. - axnu
When the Peter Pan Peanut Butter recall happened 10-12 years ago or so (due to salmonella) my then-15 year old daughter came in from school and as she was walking past the living room (tv was on) she stopped and watched the news report about the salmonella outbreak.
She got this “ah-ha” light bulb moment and said, “oh, now I get it! It’s about peanut butter! All day at school I kept hearing Peter Pan was killing people around the country and I thought he had turned bad or something and was now a villain.”
I just stared at her waiting for her to say she was joking and didn’t really think Peter Pan was real, but no, she just went upstairs to her room like we just had a normal conversation about normal, every-day events. - mazexii33
Daughter calls me 'there is a cop behind me with his lights on. What should I do?' - whatreasondoineed
When my youngest son, who was 10 at the time, was getting his ears checked at the pediatrician and they found a “foreign object” in his left ear. Said object was a dead housefly. Because he thought sticking a fly in his ear would give him flying powers. He had caught it and shoved it in there alive about a week prior. - Padfoottheguardcat
When I asked my 14yo if she could please bring me a piece of cake, she cut it, forgot why, then ate it. - TiredWhovian
When my son was 11 years old, he confidently informed me he was pretty sure he knew everything there was to know, because he tried to think of something that he didn't know, and couldn't think of anything. - misfitdevil99
I asked my kids what the biggest dinosaur was and my oldest (15Y/O male) said paleontologist without skipping a beat. That's when I knew I was in trouble. Then my friend told my 10-year old that the dirt on the car tasted like candy, so he licked it. He tried to get his 6-year-old brother to do it but even he wasn't falling for it. At least 3 out of 5 kids will move out of my house eventually. - Hunterchick212