'Monster' father gets $100 as his son inherits grandmother’s entire fortune and estate. AITA?
"AITA for accepting a big inheritance from my grandma and telling my dad him and his family are monsters like she said?"
My grandma died in 2024. I (23m) had lived with her since I was 17 and had taken over a lot of bills and stuff in the last year before grandma died (and it was sudden). I was also no contact with my dad and stepfamily. Grandma was no contact with them too.
For background on why and how we got here... My mom left when I was only a few months old. She changed her mind about having me and left me with my grandparents meaning my dad's parents.
My dad was in the military at the time and he retired after that deployment and took me home with him. Then my grandpa died a year later. So I don't remember him. My grandma continued helping out my dad.
When I was 5 my dad told me he'd met someone and she had kids a little bit older than me and they wanted us to be a family. He got me really excited to have a mom and siblings.
I don't even remember all the lead up stuff but the first time I was meeting them I remember my dad saying our family was growing that day. And the first time we met went okay. But it was downhill after that.
The second time we met my stepsiblings (who weren't stepsiblings at the time) ignored me and when me or dad were mentioned they had tantrums. We moved in together after that.
So we'd met twice and suddenly all lived together. Then the wedding took place a month later. It was very low key with hardly anyone there. But I remember my two oldest stepsiblings pushed me to the floor because the five of us were supposed to be getting ready in the same room and waiting for the parents. But my stepsiblings didn't want me with them.
What happened at the wedding wasn't an isolated incident and they bullied a lot. My dad and stepmom did nothing to stop it. They'd tell me it was hard for my step siblings and they had lost their dad and sometimes it made them a little angry but they would never hurt me intentionally. Except they did. Both physically and emotionally.
My dad and stepmom started getting annoyed with me because I'd go crying to them about it. My grandma stepped in multiple times and tried to talk sense into "my parents" and especially to dad. He told her he had met the love of his life and wouldn't end the marriage for anyone.
She pointed out that I needed him and had no one else. He said that was BS and I had a mom now. Grandma said I would never in equal to or before the older kids who were my stepmom's bio kids. Dad said that's just how it works. Grandma said not with him apparently which dad resented.
Grandma tried to take me more to make up for it but my dad and stepmom protested and refused to allow it because it meant excluding my stepsiblings. Meanwhile my stepsiblings would tell me if I couldn't live with grandma it was sad my mom didn't "get rid of me" before she left dad.
My grandma actually called CPS on my stepfamily and that didn't actually result in being no contact. Which still surprises me. Nothing was done by CPS despite them saying my dad and stepmom needed parenting classes and warning if I kept getting hurt I'd be removed. They made the threat but did not follow through.
Then came a day where we were all at grandma's house. I was 11 at the time and my stepsiblings would have been 13, 14, 16 and 17 and one of them shoved me really hard because I wanted to sit in the only free chair and it was next to them.
Grandma went off on them which set my stepmom off. Then dad defended his wife and step kids. And it all came to a stop because grandma called my stepsiblings little monsters who shouldn't be allowed around other kids because they liked beating them up.
Grandma refused to apologize and as my dad and stepmom were forcing us all to leave (which mean forcing me to leave) grandma said they were all monsters and she told dad he was not coming back from that moment.
My dad and stepmom stopped me from seeing grandma for years. I only got back in touch with her a week before I moved out. They called the police and tried to drag me back and accused my grandma of abusing my step siblings but I got to stay and no charges came from any of the accusations.
Back to today. When grandma died she had a strong will in place. She left my dad $100. That was the minimum she could leave him so he couldn't sue for the rest, which she gave to me.
I got grandma's house, which was my dad's childhood family home, I got the rest of her money, her and grandpa's sentimental possessions and she had some investments too. My dad tried to go after it saying as her only child he should get everything but her will stopped it. She left nothing to his wife or her kids.
So then they started contacting me, at first through lawyers and then on socials, saying I should be dividing it evenly and giving dad what he deserves. Then shaming me for accepting it when she excluded "my siblings".
My dad even tried coming to the house to talk and when he started to shame me for accepting it when she disrespected "our family" I told him she was right and they were all monsters and that they didn't deserve anything. I only made him more mad. And saying that is what I'm mostly questioning because I feel like I made my life harder. So AITA?
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP’s post:
NTA. Your grandma is a star, and your Dad is indeed a monster. Don’t give an inch, do not be intimidated - you are an adult and he has no power over you. Your grandma made it so that you got everything - those are her wishes - so ensure it’s kept that way. Your Dad is entitled to nothing.
FantasticEagle6062 (OP)
My grandma was the brightest start in the sky every day she was alive. I don't think I'd be alive today without her. There were some very dark days in the past when I didn't have her.
Please get the lawyer that handled the will to send them a cease and desist letter and state that if they contact you again they will be charged for harassment. Yes they want the money but having to face criminal charges and possibly be sued usually stops it.
Also with all the proof of their harassment I’d be getting the lawyer or police to apply for a restraining order against them as well. Please talk to the lawyer lots can be done.
FantasticEagle6062 (OP)
I had to get a different lawyer for the inheritance stuff. The lawyer who handled the will said they couldn't represent me. So I have a different lawyer. My lawyer has noted stuff and is in the process of sending a cease and desist letter to my dad.
But there's nothing close to what I need for a restraining order. Or the police really. The lawyer told me they won't intervene unless I'm threatened or assaulted again which has not happened yet.
First, I’m sorry for your loss. You have done absolutely nothing wrong. It was your grandmother’s estate and she decided what to do with it. They made it crystal clear how you fit into their “family”. None of those people deserve anything from you. If you give them a penny, they will bleed you dry.
But I would immediately make sure you have plenty of security cameras around the house. Unless you know the last time the locks were changed, change them just in case. You may also want to talk to your lawyer to see if you can have some type of cease and desist letter sent. If they escalate, see if you qualify for a restraining order.
Finally, FREEZE YOUR CREDIT and make sure any accounts he may be aware of are moved. He certainly has enough info on you to cause damage. You shouldn’t have had the childhood you did. Grandma was trying to make sure the rest of your life will be better. Keep doing her proud.