'AITA for canceling my GF's birthday dinner because she burned my wagyu steaks?'
"AITA for canceling my GF's birthday dinner because she burned my wagyu steaks?"
I [31m] have been in a relationship with my girlfriend [27f] for about a year. We cohabitate and have done so for the past six months. A couple of weeks back, I blew about $200 ordering some wagyu steaks. I was looking forward to them coming so much because I love cooking and have never had a real wagyu steak before.
They arrived on Thursday evening last week, and I decided we'd have them for dinner on Friday night. My girlfriend seemed generally uninterested as she's not much of a steak person, but she said she'd enjoy them with me.
On Friday morning we had an argument before I went to work. It was really stupid; she disagreed with me on a project that I'm working on involving the garage, and despite the fact that I own the house we live in, kept trying to assert authority over the decisions I made. She then brought up the wagyu steaks as evidence that I was wasting money on the project and expensive food.
I went to work in a bad mood, but I shot her a text in the afternoon saying that I'd like to talk it over a bit when I got home with a cool head. She didn't answer. I left work around 5:30, looking forward to the steaks. But when I walked in the door, there was this horrible smoke smell. My girlfriend greeted me, grabbed my hand, and led me to the table. She said "dinner is served."
The steaks were pitch black. Completely inedible. Eating them would have been a health hazard. I asked what the hell she was thinking, and she theatrically gasped with her hand over her mouth, and then said "Oh? Me?"
Now, let me get one thing straight here: there is no way she accidentally got those steaks to that condition. Based on our frying pan, she probably turned the heat up as high as it would go, threw them on with no oil or butter, and just let them sit. This was completely intentional.
I called her on her lie. She kept being obtuse. She kept using little phrases like "Oh, aren't you happy?" and "Oh, weren't you looking forward to these steaks?" I've never been so disgusted with her. Well, her birthday was on Sunday, and I had reservations to a really nice French restaurant for her, her parents, and me.
I just flat-out told her that I was canceling the reservation. She immediately flipped and told me that her parents were going to be super upset, but I didn't care. She grabbed the steaks and threw them in the garbage (where they were going to go anyway) and then stormed off.
Sunday came and went. She didn't say a single word to me, opting to lock herself in another room. Her parents have had full radio silence. I'm starting to feel bad about my decision, but did I go over the top here?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
bluestjordan said:
NTA at all. This is really spiteful and malicious behavior, OP. Be careful she doesn’t destroy your belongings or home.
MSN-2017 said:
NTA. She wasted $200 worth of steak to be petty. So tell her she wasted that money so she can consider it her birthday present. Her complaining about you wasting money, it's your money, not hers. She has no say in your finances as well as what you do in YOUR house. Also, she seems fine with you spending that kind of money as long as it's on her.
Seems to me she thinks she has the right to dictate what you do and do not do. You're not engaged or married, so she has no say. Has she done stuff like this before? What else does she try to dictate in your life? Think long and hard about this relationship. Is this what you want to put up with for the rest of your life?
GreenSuccessful7642 said:
NTA and for the love of God break up with her. Wasting 200 dollars worth of food is asinine and doing it to get back at you is just pure evil. Nobody messes with wagyu steaks.
Justaredditor85 said:
NTA. Send her back to her parents. Tell them to send her back to kindergarten where her behavior is age appropriate.
l3ex_G said:
Nta please just break up, she wasted $200 because she was throwing a tantrum. Do you really want her as a partner?
kingpug87 said:
So she didn't agree with the decision you made regarding your own house then deliberately burnt your $200 steaks as a punishment? You shouldn't cancel her birthday dinner, you should cancel the relationship.