'AITA for ditching a family vacation in favor of going away with my husband?'
"AITA for ditching a family vacation in favor of going away with my husband?"
Every year my family likes to plan a big vacation together. It is usually my mother, my sister, my brother and his wife, my daughter, her husband, and my grand baby, and finally me and my husband. We also have open invitations to other various relatives. This year they wanted to do an All Inclusive resort in Aruba.
It was settled and tickets were purchased. While I don't mind going on vacation with family I have some qualms with the various parties who are attending. Let's start with my mother who is up in age, but hasn't really taken the best care of her body.
So, she has weight problems that have affected her ability to walk. It has also led to sleep apnea. This means that she can't walk very far without taking tons of breaks and will fall asleep anywhere.
Which isn't a problem except every time we plan an activity that requires some level of physical fitness she discourages us from doing it and she can't take us having fun without her. So, we end up scraping our plans and doing whatever activity she feels she can do.
Then there is my brother who wants to go and can't afford his own way. This leads him to scrounge off my mother to find a way to go. Usually, it plays itself out as he says he is going. His ticket gets bought and everything else paid for and then my mother will have some sort of emergency where we need to help her out.
We basically end up giving her close to if not more than what it costs for my deadbeat brother to go. And then we spend the rest of the vacation paying for him and mom through meals, tickets to attractions, and anything else that tickles their fancy.
Now that you have some background let's get to the AH part. As we get closer to the trip I get rumblings of my mother needing the cash for house repairs, then my brother has to quit his job to go on the trip because "the man" won't let him off, and my daughter and her husband book the honeymoon suite. As all this is going down and we confirm flights, accommodations, and excursions I just nod my head and agree.
The day of the trip we all head to the airport and get through security. As everyone turns left to go to their gate, me and my husband turn the opposite way. They start quizzing us where we are going and we are getting something to eat can we bring them some. So, I just turn to them and say "we have decided to go on a cruise out of Miami, see you guys in a couple weeks."
My daughter is irate and says "who is going to watch the baby while we enjoy our 2nd honeymoon." My mother is like who is going to pay for this for her and pay for that. My brother just looks dumbfounded like he just lost his pet. And they all start to tell me how I am ruining there vacation and I am an AH and stuff. So, internet please pass judgement and let me know AITAH?
Here's what the top commenters had to say about this one:
Current_Can8134 said:
NTA They're at an all inclusive. They don't NEED to pay for meals etc. They'll be fine. They'll just have to spend the week around the pool taking care of themselves.
Martha90815 said:
NTA and you are an absolute G for the last minute switcharoo! Nicely done!
Careless_League_9494 said:
NTA and I hope you had a wonderful trip! Your family sound like a bunch of entitled AH honestly.
CottonCandy76548 said:
NTA - OP this is how you do it. I would have done this too. You have earned this vacation and after reading what you wrote, you deserve it. You were never going to have fun in Aruba catering to everyone else.
I love my cruises, so make sure you take lots of pictures and eat all that yummy food. Go to the spa while you are onboard. Have a blast and remember you did the right thing.
Effective-Manager-29 said:
This is gold! SO NTA