Uncle sells family business instead of passing it on to 'bratty' nephews. AITA?
"AITA for disinheriting my nephews?"
No_Radio1862
My mom and passed away last year and I want to be closer to my daughters who live out of state. I have ran a construction business that started with a friend of mine when I was in my 20’s. I bought my friend’s share out during 2013. So it has been my business.
I’m selling it to one of my friendly competitors before I move at current market rate. I’m also selling off my house and most of my stuff. Since I’m self employed this is my retirement or an investment in a new business once I move.
My nephews have worked for me on and off the last 10 years. I have never said I was leaving them anything. I was responsible after I had a heart attack a few years ago and made a will. Everything I own was already being split 50/50 with my daughters.
My sister and nephews come in and want to buy out my business instead of me selling it. They do not have the money that I’m getting at market rates. They insist that it’s a family business and I said no it’s not. It’s mine and I built it over the last 30 years and I’m ready to retire.
My nephews think that it’s obviously a family business and it should go to them. It’s not. They always felt like I was obligated or should leave it to them since they helped me out. I told them they were just employees like everyone else on my team.
Then they randomly asked about my will and I said everything was being left to my daughters. That was decided years ago. My daughters do not have the best relationship with their cousins but that’s not even my problem. They acted like I was the worst person ever for this.
That whole side of the family thinks I did my nephews dirty now and it has just made my timeline of moving smaller. Everyone acts like I’m disinheriting my nephews but they wasn’t even in the question to begin with.
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
owls_and_cardinals
NTA. You 'did your nephews dirty' by offering them employment over the last 10 years, because you didn't give them your business (or take a bath selling to them with a hefty friends and family discount)?
They are terribly entitled. In what way did they 'help you out' outside of having paid jobs? If there isn't anything more to this story you definitely are not TA. And to your point, there is no 'disinheriting' them if they weren't receiving an inheritance from you to begin with. What an old, stodgy term, to be honest. They're acting like it's this big insult and it's just not.
ReviewOk929
"It’s mine and I built it over the last 30 years and I’m ready to retire."
NTA - Good for you! Also you didn't disinherit them, they just assumed they were inline for it....If they can't pay market rate then they are out of luck. They didn't help you out they worked for you and got money in exchange. Only way you'd be the A H is if you made promises.
mrstinyrick
NTA. Sell the business and live your life, girl.
lilolememe
NTA. They're acting entitled. You were gracious enough to give them a job. You paid them a fair wage. You don't owe them anything more. The great news is that you're moving out of state away from these toxic family members and never have to see them again.
Afraid_Ad_1536
NTA. What a bunch of entitled brats. I worked for my uncle for years at his business and when he sold it off I was happy for him and found another job. I may have gotten away with stuff that non relative employees didn't (I'm not sure because he was incredibly forgiving to most of them) but I was still just an employee.
yago1980
NTA - your business, your decision, your things, you can leave/sell them to whomever you want. However, if they match what you are getting at market value, perhaps consider selling to them.
Artistic_Tough5005
NTA It sounds like your sister and nephews did a whole lot of assuming. Your nephews are not entitled to anything. The fact that you let them work for you is nice. That doesn’t mean they own part of your business.
maj0rdisappointment
NTA, it's your decision. If they could buy it at fair market value and you refused it would be different. If they can get close to the right number then I think they'd have a case, but from the sounds of things they aren't even in the ballpark range?
Selling your business at the best benefit for your daughters and their future isn't wrong. It's your call. Heck this isn't even disinheriting your nephews. They were never in the inheritance in the first place.
forgeris
If your nephews were just a regular workers and you never promised them anything then definitely NTA. It is your business and your money, no idea why they even thought that you will leave everything to them, probably your sister promised them that without ever consulting with you and now she is reeking consequences and it is always easier to blame others.
You have 2 daughters to think about, nephews have their own parents who can leave them whatever they want, doubt your sister would leave anything to your daughters, so there is that.
kurokomainu
NTA If they were employees just like the others and you hadn't told them any different, or given them any extra responsibilities or expectations because they are family, you can't be responsible for a story they have built up in their own heads on their own.
Perhaps they had told themselves that them working for you and being physically closer to you on a daily basis somehow put them on the same level of importance or higher to you than your own children. They were mistaken, and that's not your fault if they had expectations of inheriting money or getting handed the business because of that.
I suspect there may have been a lot of wishful thinking and building up of expectations on that side of the family that you weren't privy to. These conversations may have become reality in their own minds, but if you weren't involve in the construction of their fantasies you aren't responsible for them.