'AITA for not stopping when my 4 yo son said he needed the bathroom?'
'AITA for not stopping when my son said he needed the bathroom?'
So, this happened today, and I (35F) can't stop thinking about it. We were on our way home from a long day out, and “Evan” (4M) suddenly says he needs to use the bathroom really badly. At this point, we were only about 15 minutes away from home. I told him to hold it, explaining we were almost there and that stopping at a store would just take longer.
He kept insisting that he couldn’t hold it, much longer and he's been waiting for a very long time, but I thought he was just exaggerating because he tends to do that sometimes. I reminded him that he's done great holding it before and reassured him we’d be home soon. Well, we didn’t even make it five minutes before he started crying and then... he peed himself in the car seat.
When I realized what had happened, I was so annoyed. Not just at him, but at the situation. Now the car seat was soaked, and I had to clean everything up when we got home. I told him I was disappointed he didn’t try harder to hold it. He apologized, but I could tell he was embarrassed and upset.
Later, when I was venting to my husband about it, he said I should’ve just stopped at a store or gas station when Evan first mentioned needing the bathroom. I argued that it’s not unreasonable to expect him to wait 15 minutes, especially since stopping would’ve added even more time to the drive. Now I’m wondering if I was too harsh or if I should’ve listened better. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought:
viaolaan writes:
YTA especially right here: I was so annoyed. Not just at him, but at the situation. You have the unmitigated gall to be annoyed at the 4 y/o for your decision not to let this 4 y/o use the bathroom when the 4 y/o told you he needed to use the bathroom? Really? It was your decision to ignore his request(s).
not even just one time. He told you several times that he had to pee. You literally acknowledge that he insisted he needed to but you refused. Be annoyed at yourself! Apologize to the 4 y/o because this was all on you and you alone.
aghah writes:
The kid is 4 years old and probably doesn’t have the planning skills you’re expecting hence why he’d already been holding it for a while, but I also don’t think you had any intention of being an asshole. You simply overestimated the abilities of a toddler. Now you can explain to him that he didn’t do anything wrong but next time he needs to tell his mom if he needs the bathroom before he gets in the car. NAH.
gelapt writes:
You got mad at a 4 year old because he couldn’t control his bladder?? His very small bladder?? Yes you were unreasonable and a huge asshole. YTA.
flaaasther writes:
YTA, he’s four, you can’t expect a four year old to hold pee in for fifteen minutes. He told you he had to go, couldn’t hold it, and you ignored him. It’s your fault he peed in the car seat, he told you chose not to listen to him.