'AITA for telling an American woman she wasn't German after she failed to respond in German?'

"AITAH for telling an American woman she wasn't German?"

I'm a German woman, as in, born and raised in Germany. I was traveling in another country and staying at a hostel, so there were people from a lot of countries. There was one woman from the US and we were all just talking about random stuff. We touched the topic of cars and someone mentioned that they were planning on buying a Porsche.

The American woman tried to correct the guy saying "you know, that's wrong, it's actually pronounced. I just chuckled and said "no...he actually said it right". She just snapped and said "no no no, I'm GERMAN ok? I know how it's pronounced."

I switched to German (I have a very natural New York accent, so maybe she hadn't noticed I was German) and told her "you know that's not how it's pronounced." She couldn't reply and said "what?" I repeated in English, and I said "I thought you said you were German...". She said "I'm German but I don't speak the language."

I asked if she was actually German or if her great great great grandparents were German and she said it was the latter, so I told her "I don't think that counts as German, sorry, and he pronounced Porsche correctly." She snapped and said I was being an elitist and that she was as German as I am.

I didn't want to take things further so I just said OK and interacted with other people. Later on I heard from another guy that she was telling others I was an AH for "correcting her" and that I was "a damn n-zi trying to determine who's German or not." Why did she react so heavily? Was it actually so offensive to tell her she was wrong?

The internet did not hold back one bit.

Forsaken_Dog822 wrote:

Absolutely NTA. She was embarrassed to have been corrected, some people can't stand it (even if they are the first correcting the others) 😂

Stahrofforzeim wrote:

NTA. There is a difference in being German and having German lineage. I was born in Pforzheim and migrated to the US. I completely understand where you are coming from.

BlackEyedRat wrote:

NTA Claiming to be German and yet casually accusing someone of Nazism is actually hilarious. Like could not be more disconnected from actual social norms in Germany. You were 100% correct, she’s not German, she never will be German. Only Americans do this and it is bizarre. I am Scottish so I see it constantly and it is no less annoying…

Hannyuk wrote:

NTA. She clearly doesn’t understand the difference between ancestry and nationality. Correcting her pronunciation as an actual German isn’t elitist, it’s factual. Her overreaction says more about her insecurities than anything you said.

No-Watercress-5054 wrote:

America is a weird place when it comes to ethnicity. Whether someone’s parents or great-great-great-grandparents emigrated from another country, they will always be told they “aren’t really Irish/Mexican/Nigerian/whatever.” Meanwhile, a Chinese American whose family have been in the US since the railroads were first being constructed will always be asked “Where are you really from?”

And then there’s decedents of sl-ves who have had all ties to whatever African nations their ancestors were from ripped from them. Non-Indigenous people can’t seem to make up their minds if other non-Indigenous spawned here out of the blue or if family history actually spans continents.

MediumLab5741 wrote:

NTA. I'm an American, and I hate it when fellow Americans pull that crap. You handled it just fine. I would be sooooo embarrassed if I was traveling with that lady. I have German ancestors, and we hang a pickle on our Christmas tree, but that sure doesn't make me German lol.

Waste-Giraffe-6955 wrote:

NTA. You corrected her in a straightforward way, and her overreaction says more about her insecurities than anything you said. Claiming distant heritage doesn’t make someone an expert, and you simply pointed that out.

Kalikhead wrote:

As an American we often refer to ourselves as hyphen Americans (eg German- American, Irish American, etc) and admittedly we think of ourselves as part of the ancestry of our family that came the US despite the fact that many of families have been here for several generations. It’s annoying at times.

Being considered a Paddy-Yank I find it can be rather strange - especially when fellow Irish-Americans think they know about Ireland than the Irish themselves (no the Irish do not eat corned beef and cabbage, the color of St Patrick is blue not green, drinking on St Patrick’s Day is an American tradition that went to Ireland).

I am considered an Irish-American because of my Irish name but I am actually of mixed European heritage. I just call myself American. Sorry you had to deal with one of our jack-sses. Next time tell them how to correctly pronounce Adidas to really blow their minds.

OP responded:

Wait...how do americans pronounce Adidas???!!!

oremfriend responded:

Americans pronounce it like "u-di-dus" where each "u" is the schwa and the emphasis is downward throughout the word as opposed to Germans who pronounce it "a-di-das" where each "a" is the Spanish/German "a" and the emphasis is upward throughout the word (almost like asking a question).

JerseyGirl2468 wrote:

NTA it's not unusual for many Americans to say "I'm Irish/German/Korean/whatever" referring to their ancestry rather than their citizenship. But it is stupid for someone to think they are the authority on something they know little about, double down, and get offended when exposed to be wrong. I don't know so many people are incapable of just say "oops, I was wrong."

AcantthisittaNo9122 wrote:

NTA. It’s damn odd, my grandparents migrated and I don’t really consider myself to have the same nationality as they did, ethnically yes but do I go around telling ppl that I’m from their country, no 🤦🏻‍♀️

However, I can speak their dialect fluently, with local accent as well. My accent is so smooth that ppl ask if I’m from a specific town in that country and I always tell them that my grandparents came from that town but I was born and raised else where. Why she’s so desperately want to be a European?

Careless-Ad-6328 wrote:

NTA. Americans have a very different way of defining identity than the rest of the world, it's pretty wild. In the US, because the country is relatively new, very large, and such a melting pot of people from all over, we don't have a strong singular identity as American insofar as our heritage.

Even though many of us are 5+ generations deep Americans now. So instead Americans look at their heritage as a function of where their ancestors came to America from. Because to American eyes, being German, French, Italian, English etc. has a more clear and solid meaning. It's an identity they can articulate.

It's super hard to create a single definition of American as an identity. A person from rural Alabama is very different from a person from NYC, or someone from the PNW. We're bound by a common language, but couldn't be more different from one another. Now, there are always exceptions, like Texans are the vegans of the US...they will tell you they're Texan quite forcefully, without ever being asked.