'AITA for not accepting water from a woman who happened to be a Muslim? I was called out.'
"AITA for not accepting water from a woman who happened to be a Muslim?"
I was traveling with my friend on a bus and happened to ask her for some water, but she didn't have any. A woman in her 30s wearing a hijab offered me her bottle but I refused because she's a stranger, as simple as that, no mention of religion or anything.
As soon as I refused she said- but you just said you're thirsty. I politely replied that yes, but you're a stranger, hence. She was quick to reply with 'is it because of my religion?' I said no, it's not, it's only because I don't know you and idk if it's safe. But she kept on insisting saying it's safe to drink it and i should take it. I said no again.
She scoffed and said something under her breath about me being r-cist, atp I had enough and told her to shut it and I don't want her water. A few other passengers noticed and one of them, a young guy, commented something hurtful to her religion which I'll not quote, but the woman was noticeably taken aback and got down at the next stop itself.
I feel this fiasco will play in her mind for a while, which is not good and I should've just accepted the water as a comeback to the guy who commented, so AITA?
Edit - it was a pink opaque bottle.
The commenters had a lot to say in response.
Ok-Status-9627 wrote:
INFO:
Was the water bottle sealed, or had the woman been drinking from the bottle already before she offered it to you?
OP responded:
No, it was a pink opaque bottle, maybe a steel one.
faxmachine13 wrote:
NTA. The most important factor (that you might want to add to the post) is that it was from her personal water bottle, not a sealed plastic one. Idk anyone would would want to drink from a stranger’s glass or bottle.
RDenisM wrote:
NTA for not drinking the water but did you stick up for her when the other guy made a hateful comment?
OP responded:
No I didn't, she got down within 2-3 minutes at the next stop. She was making snide remarks at me even when I did nothing wrong, but she doesn't say anything to the guy who openly berated her?
Pistonenvy23 wrote:
If you cared about people not thinking you were r-cist why didn't you speak up when the other guy made it about her religion? That was your opportunity to make it clear to everyone, particularly this woman, that you aren't r-cist.
Now, instead, you come across as being in agreement with him. that woman probably feels like everyone on that bus is r-cist and why shouldn't she? She probably deals with comments like that 24/7.
OP responded:
I would have, but I was taken aback from everything she was saying to me passive aggressively. I don't get it, I didn't do anything and she labels me as a bigot but says nothing to the person who's actually a r-cist?
ParanoidWalnut wrote:
Unless the bottle is SEALED, I'm never accepting a drink from someone I don't know and/or trust. They could either be sick or spiked it in the worst-case scenario. Not to mention, I don't want someone's germs in my drink. In grade school we used to take "shots" using the bottle cap and "jug" it so our mouth didn't touch the cap itself but we still got hydrated a bit.
I'm not Muslim or know what that's like or the prejudice, but blaming the rejection on that sounds like a "her" problem. You refused it based on her being a stranger and not her religion.
subsailor1968 wrote:
NTA.
Unless it’s a sealed bottled water, I wouldn’t accept either. Doesn’t matter what race/gender/religion they are, I don’t know them well enough to trust them.
Castlecollector wroteL
You certainly should not have taken the water, but actively calling out the person making the comments would hopefully have had her realise her assumption was incorrect.
deaddumbslut wrote:
OMFG THANK YOU! so many people are like “that’s not her job!!!” But… she was so worried about being seen as r-cist, so change that opinion by saying something to the guy or even just “I don’t want water from a stranger, but I don’t agree with TA.”
Plus like…even to the petty people there’s a benefit to calling the real r-cist out.
Then the woman who thought you were racist would be embarrassed for thinking that, and you’d get to feel doubly good. how is that not enough motivation for these people lmaoo? like, not only are you helping someone else and generally just not being a bystander for it, but you could at least reassure her that there ARE good people and that no, she just doesn’t want your water lol