"AITA for telling my sister I’m not inviting her to any more of my events if she brings her son?"

I 25F am pregnant with my first child. Yesterday was my gender reveal and my husband and I had the cutest idea (I’m biased) I let my best friend take care of the planning, I Just gave her the theme. Our theme was like a crime scene investigation.

There was an area taped off with crime scene tape. There were even like the little cards that were numbered for evidence. Everyone was told to not cross the tape. My best friend went even as far as to dress up like a police officer and keep the “public out."

My sister 30F has a 13 year old who is… a lot. He’s a handful. She doesn’t discipline him. She’s one of those parents who thinks her kid can do no wrong and that everyone else is the problem. He’s been suspended from school 4 times already and it’s only October. He’s been banned from Walmart for stealing. He broke his neighbors window.

I told her before she came that I need her to keep him next to her at all times. At least until the reveal was done. If that was too much then she shouldn’t come. She assured me she would make sure he was attached to her hip. He was not. I had to remind her twice to keep him away from the area.

My best went to the bathroom for 5 minutes while everyone was standing around waiting for her to come back so we can do the gender reveal. She was supposed to come out and lift up the covers she had over the “evidence.” Before she could do that we hear this giant boom from behind a curtain she set up and all we see is white smoke and he comes out with white powder all over him.

I was in shock. My sister started laughing and telling me congratulations. I started immediately bawling. I was so upset and hurt that she couldn’t even keep him next to her until the reveal was done. He then scoffed and said I was being dramatic. That I was going to find out anyway.

I went off. I started cursing them both out. I told them to leave and not come back and that I will never invite her to another event that I’m hosting. That she couldn’t even do one thing for me. Her son was “crying” that I yelled at him and he did the whole thing “mommy, please save me” act. There were no tears and he wasn’t remorseful at all.

My sister started to go off on me for yelling at her son and my husband told her that wasn’t going to happen in front of him. She tried to come at me for my husband “coming at her."

My step mom (that’s a whole me, our dad cheated on her mom and had me, left her mom for mine, then ended up cheating on my mom with her mom and now they’re married)said I was overreacting and I was and am going through a lot. I’m a nurse who 3 or 4 12 hours shifts a week and I am exhausted. I told her she could get tf out too and it’s not like she ever liked me.

My mom and friends told them to leave and that they shouldn’t be stressing me out. My dad was conflicted on who to defend but he ultimately stayed for me. They made a ruckus before leaving.

Later that night I got a text in the group chat that I embarrassed her and her son. That it wasn’t a big deal and I should be happy to have a healthy baby. I told her that’s not what the problem was. I didn’t know what the gender was and I wanted it to be a surprise and celebrate it with my family. She said I was being dramatic.

I told her to not contact me until she and her son can give a genuine apology and that I wouldn’t be inviting her to any of my events because of her son and if she can’t leave him alone (which she can’t because he acts the way he does) then she’ll have to miss out. She started mass texting the group and I blocked her. She tried to call me from her mom’s phone.

The white smoke was supposed to reveal a makeshift Jail cell with blue clothes, stuffed animals, basketballs, baseballs, footballs, trucks, all your stereotypical boy stuff and there was a giant projector with a picture of the sonogram and it said “Release date Feb 12th”

I loved it so much and I was so sad she didn’t get to do her whole scene she had played out for us. She worked really hard on it.

EDIT: THERE WAS NO FIRE INVOLVED. I’ve seen the stories where places are set on fire. It was a simple cannon with white smoke. That was the “explosion” we heard.

What do you think? AITA? This is what top commenters had to say:

SmeeegHeead said:

I'm sure she'll request help when son is in prison. Nta.

chrisrevere2 said:

I’m sure the rest of the world is going to give that kid a wake up call

DismalSoil9554 said:

NTA. The kid is out of control and you are correct in wanting to keep him away from your home/events.

SomethingHasGotToGiv said:

I think it’s more important now that you stay away from your sister and her son. I wouldn’t want my baby anywhere near them. I would fear for his safety around your nephew.

And NeolithicOrkney said:

My take on this is not about the gender reveal but if I was OP I would be more concerned about a very out of control teenager being anywhere near my baby/child. It is just a matter of time before he does something very serious.

He is acting out to see how far his mother will let him go, and since in her eyes he can do no wrong, it will be something very serious. The gender reveal would be the least of my concerns with this kid.

Do you agree?