Bride cancels wedding out of the blue over a 'rumor,' 'I was GOBSMACKED.' AITA?
"AITA for cancelling my wedding out of the blue for a rumor about my fiancé and my best friend?"
Me (F26) and my fiancé (M27) have been in a relationship for 4 years, and engaged for 1. I’ve always felt like our relationship was solid and stable, since we rarely got into fights, and even those would be light discussions. He’s the sweetest, most supportive partner I’ve had, and truthfully I’ve been imagining our wedding for some months now.
Everything came down once he told my mother in law that he proposed to me. I was in the same room, and I could see how her face fell. She pulled him into another room and I couldn’t hear what they said, but I saw my fiancé’s face as if he had been screamed at.
My MIL soon after apologized and excused herself out of our apartment, after I asked him what happened he didn’t really answered me, just said that it was “mom and son stuff." I didn’t pressure on it, but it left a very bad taste in my mouth.
Normally, I told my best friend (F26) about what happened, and she immediately changed the topic. Not really acknowledging how weird it was or how I felt at his excuse. I didn’t really get to ask why she was acting this way, since she always dismissed it or told me it wasn’t that serious and I should be focused on the wedding.
Days after, I met with my wedding coordinator to choose the overall aesthetic I wanted. My fiancé didn’t come with me since he was working, so my sister in law agreed to help me out. I saw this as an opportunity to make connection with his family. SIL was acting weird, almost uncomfortable by the planning. I thought it was normal, and she was probably overwhelmed by the planning.
As I was looking for ideas, my SIL pulls me to the side and says that “she can’t hold this secret any longer, because it wasn’t fair for me." She told me that her brother and my best friend had been seeing each other behind my back, and my MIL found out about this, but told her he would soon break up with me. I was gobsmacked, I asked if she was sure of this and she said it’s what she’s heard, so not 100% sure.
I confronted him about this, and he only responded with getting mad at his sister and me for believing “gossip." I tried to understand, but as the days went on I couldn’t handle the nerves and I left to my cousins’ apartment.
This morning, I sent out an email and messages to all my family members, saying that the wedding was cancelled. I really want to confront my best friend, but I know she will deny everything. With the wedding being so close, I couldn’t handle the anxiety I felt. He has been exploding my phone with messages since I left, and I don’t know what to do.
Here's what people had to say about this one:
LeoLupumFerocem said:
It does seem sus. In all those months was there anything else that seemed off? I do not like that your friend did not want to listen to you about the mil either. That is the most weird thing to me. I mean it is fresh gossip about a huge event.
If my friend said that happened I would want the play by play. Is she usually against talking about things like this. And NTA. You did not feel right and marriage is huge. Have you considered asking mil?
ThisWeekInTheRegency said:
NTA and kudos to the groom's sister. That took guts, too. Never marry unless you are 100% sure. I remember, on my wedding day, thinking, "I've never been surer of anything in my life" - if you can't feel like that, don't get married.
yupyupyupitsducky2 said:
NTA. You trusted your instincts and prioritized your mental health and emotional well-being, which is incredibly valid—especially with something as huge as a wedding. The whole situation sounds suspicious, from your MIL's reaction to your best friend dodging the topic, and even your fiancé's refusal to communicate clearly.
You weren’t just reacting to a rumor—you were reacting to a pattern of odd, dismissive behavior and secrecy. When people are vague or deflective in situations where honesty and transparency are crucial, that’s a big red flag. You were right to pause and reassess instead of pushing forward into a lifelong commitment with all these unresolved questions.
Even if the rumor isn’t 100% confirmed, the people closest to you didn’t give you the clarity or reassurance you needed. That speaks volumes. You deserve answers—and peace of mind—before making such a major life decision. Take your time. Let things settle. When you're ready, have that confrontation with your best friend, but only on your own terms. Don’t let anyone rush you.
No_Role2325 said:
NTA. That's a pretty brave thing that you did. Always trust your gut.
69SirenBeauty said:
NTA you trusted your gut when something felt deeply wrong, and honestly, that’s brave. Even if it was just a rumor, the weird behavior from both your fiancée and best friend (plus the MIL situation) gave you enough reason to pause. It’s better to step back now than to ignore red flags and end up hurt even worse later.
Horizontal_Bob said:
NTA. If I was innocent, the first thing I would have done was prove my innocence…and I’d be mad about the rumor and worried about losing you. Instead, he was mad at his sister for tattling and mad this was all happening. He wasn’t worried or panicked about losing you for something he didn’t do.
ForeignLynx3853 said:
NTA. I mean, in the end it doesn't matter if the rumor is true or not. Either your fiancee is having an affair with your best friend (=reason not to marry) or his family hates you enough to make this up (=also a very good reason not to marry).