Bride excludes only sibling from bridesmaids and possibly the entire wedding, 'she was extra nasty.' AITA?

"AITA for not making my sister a bridesmaid and for contemplating not inviting her to my wedding either?"

My fiancé and I (both 25) are planning our wedding and we have a few things done so far, including choosing our bridesmaids and groomsmen. One person who is not in my bridal party is my sister (26).

We don't talk as adults and we never had a close relationship as kids. She never liked me and has wished she had been an only child multiple times throughout our life. She was always embarrassed to be around me, she'd trash everything I liked and mocked my appearance.

She was one of the mean girls and would make fun of me and two of my friends for being girls with a bunch of guy friends. During our teens she was extra nasty to me and our parents even got her therapy when punishing her for the stuff she'd say to me did nothing.

She even said she should be allowed to say whatever she liked to me since people knew we were sisters and she couldn't pretend she didn't know me. Growing up changed nothing and she was always such a b when we came face to face.

Even my fiancé got trash aimed at him because he was "one of those nerdy friends" of mine she didn't like and she thought it was pathetic we were dating but then said clearly nobody else would date us. I'm also the person she'd never let her future kids be around because she didn't want them to be like me.

For all these reasons I didn't ask her to be a bridesmaid which upset her and my parents. My parents didn't surprise me because I knew they might be disappointed. Her being upset shocked me but I quickly realized she was getting more from extended family for the way things are between us and wanted to put on a show for them. But my parents are the people I'm frustrated about.

They were always understanding of me avoiding my sister's cruelty but now they expect me to put her in the wedding and they were so pushy about it. What made it worse is when I said I wasn't even sure I'd invite her.

I told them I was so sure she'd either be a total ahole to me on my wedding day and create a scene or act for the day and then go back to the way she always is and she'd be wasting money that could be saved or spent on someone who isn't awful to me and my fiancé.

They told me she's my only sibling and not inviting her is something I can't take back. They told me I should be the bigger person about all of this and accept that it could go badly but you do things for family.

They told me they can't even believe I would question whether she'd be invited. They always saw me being more mature about everything and how disappointed they are in me for this. AITA?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

Smilesunshine57 said:

Nope. Time for an adult come to Jesus meeting with the parents. They know what happened as a child and adult. You do not need to suffer before, during, or after your wedding because of her. You do not need to be the bigger person.

Remind them everything she did to you as a child and adult ALSO can’t be take back and you were already at peace with your non existent relationship.

MaddyKet said:

“Accept it may go badly” ON YOUR WEDDING DAY? Hard pass. They really need to stop and think about that they said. NTA.

Valuable-Job-7956 said:

NTA. Past performance indicates future behavior. Don’t invite her and be brutally honest with the reason why with anybody who asks.

Timedpath said:

NTA. Your wedding, your choice. Unless your parents plan on holding your sister's hand and keeping their hands on her mouth and they are paying for her seat/food, throw the whole sister away.

Thehappylarge said:

NTA. You are being mature by quietly not inviting her. An immature thing to do is to mail her an invite with the info blocked out in a box full of dog sh*& and glitter.

spaceylaceygirl said:

NTA - be the bigger person just means "be a doormat so we don't have to deal with your sister's antics."