'AITA for berating my boyfriend's wife after she called me a homewrecker?'
AITAH for snapping at my boyfriend’s wife?
ThrowRArumourmill says:
So, I’m in a situation that’s been making me feel like an absolute mess, and I can’t tell if I’m the a%#$ole or not. A few months ago, I met this guy. We clicked immediately; he was charming, fun, and seemed so into me. We started seeing each other, and everything was great… until it wasn’t.
A few months into our "relationship," I found out the guy I was dating was married. I was completely blindsided. He had hidden it so well, and I felt like an idiot for not figuring it out sooner. I called it off immediately, but he kept trying to get back together.
When his wife found out, she completely blew up. I get it—she was hurt, and I wasn’t thrilled to be in the middle of this drama either. But instead of confronting him or holding him accountable, she turned her rage on me.
She started posting about me online, spreading lies, calling me a homewrecker, even though I had no idea he was married. People started sending me nasty messages, calling me names, all because of her.
The kicker? She ended up taking him back. I was more than happy to cut ties with him after finding out about his double life, but he kept trying to contact me, even after I blocked him. It’s like they both wanted to make my life miserable, and I was completely done with both of them.
Here’s where things get messy. Last night, I went out to dinner with a few friends. We were having a good time until she walked in. She saw me, stormed over, and started berating me in front of everyone, going on about how I "ruined her marriage" and how I’m this terrible person. I tried to keep my cool, but she just wouldn’t stop.
Finally, I snapped and said, "Maybe if you could satisfy your husband, he wouldn’t have had to come running to me." Yeah, I know it was harsh, but I was tired of being blamed for his choices. She burst into tears and stormed out of the restaurant, leaving everyone staring at me.
Now I feel like I went too far. I know she’s hurt, and maybe I shouldn’t have said something so cruel, but at the same time, I was done being her punching bag. My friends were kind of split on it; some said she deserved it after everything she’s put me through, and others said I should’ve just ignored her. So, AITA for what I said?
Here are the top comments:
haveanotherpringle says:
NTA but you gave her fuel to further assert the narrative that you are indeed a homewrecker.
Annual_Leading_7846 says:
No. She is in for a whole world of hurt. You likey weren't his first and almost certainly won't be his last affair. Her problems are just starting. Move on with your life and get away from them. Don't let them make this your problem again. If you see her again maybe treat her kindly and really talk to her. She may be different if she knows the whole story.
CigarsAndFastCars says:
NTA for defending yourself or refusing to put up with her outrage, but YTA for what you said. Here's a better response, "Stop. This isn't the place or the person to be attacking. I had no idea your cheating husband was married because he lied to and hid it from me, and I broke things off with him and blocked him the moment I found out.
Deal with your lying and cheating husband yourself. Neither of you are my business, so back off and take your anger where it belongs. And if you don't believe me, just how many more times does he need to cheat before you realize it's him."
Away-Understanding34 says:
YTA, but to yourself. You basically acted in public like the mistress that was proud of herself for being with a married man. Instead I think you should have yelled you didn't know and called her out for being spineless for taking her lying cheating snake of a husband back. You should have also suggested she take a closer look at his actions since you probably aren't the 1st and won't be the last.
What do you think?