'AITA for making my GF homeless because I can't buy a house fast enough or am I being scammed?'

"My GF is going to be homeless if I don't buy us a house soon."

Chenzo55BETA writes:

I started dating my long-time friend about 7 months ago. While I’ve always had a crush on her and loved her personality, she has a recurring problem. She has a hard time finding or keeping a residence for long periods.

She has no family that is responsible enough to turn to, and her friends have either moved out of state or are married with children, so she doesn’t have many places to turn to.

Not long after we started dating, about a week in, she confessed to me that she was behind on her bills. Rent, car payments, to the point that she couldn’t provide for herself. Being a long-time friend and now her boyfriend, I helped her out by giving her $700 so she could right her sails. That helped until she fell ill and missed a week of work, putting her behind again on payments.

She suffers from a compromised immune system, so I wasn’t going to hold that against her. I gave her another $1,000 to cover expenses so she could have more than enough to make the upcoming payments and still eat.

Then her uncle ruins the relationship between her and her landlord, meaning she only has a month to find a new place to live. She refuses to live with a roommate, and after a month, I convinced my parents to let her live with us in my room rent-free.

Not long after she moves in, she quits her job - they were abusive to the point of breaking the law - and she looks for a new one, taking about a month to do so. I pay all her costs at this time for another $600ish.

Then she lands a job at a CHAIN COFFEE SHOP and needs a new wardrobe for the dress code. I front the bill for that and the makeup for about $1,000, including makeup and new clothes. She starts the job and is immediately being harassed by staff for her short height, some not even helping her get things from high shelves.

She then falls ill with Covid and misses more than a week of work. The coffee shop demands she take a leave of absence for some reason, but we decide it’s better for her to look into getting her old job back.

I pay her expenses for another $700ish, and she goes back to her old job. Now, after 4 months and being able to make money, my folks want her to leave, having overstayed her welcome. But she doesn’t want a roommate and wants to get a house with me, a goal I'd been saving up for, for nearly a year at that point.

Now she's living with a coworker until the end of the month and will be homeless after unless I find and close on a house. She’s upset that it isn’t happening fast enough for her, but I feel I’ve done a lot for her already, and she needs to square her own rigging and find a place to rent with a roommate until I have enough saved up to buy a house.

The internet has some thoughts:

520throwaway says:

NTA (Not the A^@*ole) That girl is stringing you along with bulls%@t after bulls^&t. "Then her uncle ruins the relationship between her and her landlord meaning she only has a month to find a new place to live." Bullsh%@t. Landlords do not kick people out just because they don't like their relatives.

"Not long after she moves in she quits her job, they were abusive to the point of law breaking." Did you verify this or did she just say that?

"I front the bill for that and the makeup for about $1000 including make up and new clothes." Bro. I dont pay half that much for a wardrobe when I am liaising with f%@$ing C-suite! There is no way in hell that coffee shop uniform and appropriate makeup costs $1000.

"The coffee shop demands she take a leave of absence for some reason but we decide it’s better for her to look into getting an older job back." WHYYYY?

"Now she living with a coworker until the end of the month and will be homeless after unless I find and close on a house.'" Noooo. This is a trap.

External_Occasion123 says:

$1000 wardrobe to make $15 an hour is poor math.

sofrigginpsyched says:

NTA. Also $1000 for makeup and clothes to meet dress code at a coffee shop?? Sorry but that doesn’t make sense to me.

Honeydew543 says:

Oh honey RUN! This girl is trouble and irresponsible. If you ever buy a house and live with her you may never get her out! Depending on your state’s laws. You will be bailing her out forever. The fact that she’s comfortable taking and taking and taking from your good heart should tell you everything.

What do you think? Is OP bring taken for a ride?