Man refuses to watch any movie more complicated than Hallmark with his wife, 'she cannot follow a plot.' AITA?

"AITA because I will not watch anything more complicated than a Hallmark movie with my wife?"

I love my wife. She is intelligent, and sweet. Also she is beautiful inside and out. She teaches high school English and Social Studies. She loves novels and usually has several on the go. However she cannot follow the plot of a movie to save her life.

Unless it is about a big city lawyer visiting her home town to shut down the local factory but instead reconnecting with her high school boyfriend who is also the local baker and mayor.

I've known this about her for years and I have accepted it. I just like vegging with her so I am happy to see white people rediscovering the magic of Christmas. Or whatever. When we were dating, we watched The Matrix. The questions she asked had me wondering about her. Ditto for anything complex. Even The Usual Suspects where they lay everything out for you she didn't get the ending.

We had her sister and brother-in-law over for a couples night on Friday. We made supper and the plan was to watch a movie. Hee sister wanted to watch Shutter Island. I will not spoil it but the movie has many twists. The ending is awesome. I tried my best to suggest anything else.

The new Laura Dern movie where she bangs the kid from Hunger Games. They all ganged up on me and said we were watching Shutter Island. My wife proceeded to embarrass herself by not understanding the ending and asking questions that were not great.

Her sister and her husband were looking at my wife like she was Simple Jack. I tried my best to cover for her or telling her I would explain it later. She got mad at me for not just answering her questions.

After they left she started in in me. She said that she noticed that we always watched a certain kind of movie and that she thought I enjoyed them. I said I did because we got to spend time together and that made me happy.

She said that she was not an idiot and that she just didn't concentrate on movies. She recited the plots of several novels to prove her point. I said that I had never commented on her intelligence and that she was smarter than me. She says that I'm a jerk for not watching movies I enjoy with her.

So I agreed and we watched Memento today. I think her head almost exploded from bot asking questions. I saw her on Wikipedia reading the plot. AITA for intentionally not watching complicated movies with my wife?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

aldergirl said:

NAH. I can understand why you picked movies you could both enjoy, and I can see why she might be a bit miffed at the miscommunication. Having said that, maybe she's already found the solution to the problem.

You both watch the complex movie together, and then she reads the plot summary so she can process the information in a way that makes sense to her. Then she doesn't have to ask questions, and you can both enjoy movies together.

Depending on how her brain works, she might even enjoy reading the plot summary first, and then watching it with you. She might be able to enjoy the movie even more. It'd be like when you watch a movie about a book you read, but this time everything is accurate because the "book" is the plot summary.

Ok_Homework_7621 said:

NTA. It's actually not uncommon to process written language better than spoken. I'm not as severe as your wife, but if I have the option, I always go for subtitles. And yes, sometimes I need to read something for it to sink in. I can't listen to podcasts, they are like an annoying itch in my head.

I'm just a bit surprised she's not more aware of the issue. Maybe she can talk to her GP? Sometimes the upside is mostly some tools and tips on managing her condition to make it easier.

No_Beautiful5200 said:

YTA. There are so many good movies out there. But all of your examples are from the 2% of movies that are deliberately confusing or known for their plot twists. If you look at IMDB's "Best Movies of all time," while I strongly disagree with the list, I'm sure she'd be fine the large majority of movies there.

It comes across like you're searching hard for some way to put her down. You're embarrassed by her because she didn't get the plot twists of Shutter Island? She likes to watch movies, it's an activity you do with friends, but she's only capable of movies that are famously stupid?

Snow2D said:

It would be one thing if you had communicated to her that you don't want to explain movies to her. But instead you manipulated her into thinking that you only liked simple movies.

Not only that, but you seem more concerned about her coming across as dumb than you are concerned about having to explain the plot. Bruh, it's her sister, surely her sister knows that she's bad at understanding movies. YTA. You should have communicated like an adult.

apieceofeight said:

NTA, I'd feel exhausted constantly having to explain movies to someone. If she can’t concentrate on a movie even when trying (is she trying?), maybe that’s something she may want to get checked out.

Serious-MIss said:

NTA. Honestly, it sounds like you’re being super thoughtful by picking movies that let you both just chill together without turning it into a Q&A marathon. Some people are just built for cozy, feel-good plots, not mind-bending mysteries. And that’s fine!

But maybe every now and then, give her a crack at the complicated stuff if she’s up for it—just have Wikipedia loaded on standby. This way, you can laugh about it together (and she can flex her “novel plot recall” superpower whenever necessary). It’s all about finding the balance between The Matrix and the magic of small-town holiday reunions!

TastyEnchiladas said:

YTA you keep saying you don’t think she’s stupid but it really feels like you do. You should show her this post and see how she feels about how you talk about her. Also the movie examples you gave the matrix, usual suspects, shutter island, and memento all have odd storytelling narratives they jump around or hide information, the viewer isn’t suppose to necessarily understand.

Try a movie that tells a more straightforward narrative it’s really not hard there’s so much out there, just watch paddington.