Man throws brother an 'end of alimony' party in Vegas; 'it was in bad taste.' AITA?
"AITA for throwing my brother an end of alimony party?"
My older brother and his ex had a rocky marriage before they finally divorced. To be honest, there were enough faults on both of their parts so no one can claim the high ground. Because his income was several times of hers, the court awarded her alimony.
Thankfully, they were married for less than 10 years so he only had to pay her alimony for half of the years they were married. His last payment to her will happen this month so the guys and I are planning an end of alimony party for him.
We’re planning a week long stay in Vegas at the Wynn and will chip in to fully cover his end. Because we’re planning to go at the end of the month and there are about a dozen guys going, we’ve been texting and talking to coordinate the trip.
When the trip was first planned, I told my girlfriend and she wasn’t happy about it. She wasn’t mad that we’re having a guy’s trip because we’ve taken separate vacations before without any issues. She was unhappy with the theme and said that it was in bad taste.
I disagree and we had discussions about it until we agreed to disagree. On Friday she was using my phone to watch her shows and one of the guys sent a pic he designed for a shirt we’re planning to have made for him to wear.
The gist of the design is that he’s free of alimony payments and can afford to eat again with some graphics. It was in a group text and the other guys texted their robust approval. This sent my girlfriend into a rage I’ve never seen before.
We got into a huge argument that lasted all weekend. We even had to cancel dinner plans we had with some friends. I thought our argument was coming to an end but this morning while we were getting ready for work, she gave me the silent treatment and completely ignored my questions.
Basically she wants me to cancel the trip and admit that we’re being terrible people for celebrating something so painful. I don’t want to cancel the trip and my brother is excitedly looking forward to the end of his payments so I don’t see any pain.
I honestly don’t know why she’s so mad because none of this have anything to do with her. She doesn’t even know the ex since they divorced before we even met.
EDIT:
Thanks for reading my post and giving your insight. I’m going to answer some questions in this edit.
My brother and his ex both worked during their marriage. He’s a dentist and she’s a teacher so their income was unbalanced which was why she was awarded alimony.
He didn’t actually starve during the alimony years but his lifestyle was severely impacted. His monthly alimony payments were more than her monthly salary.
There are no kids involved. They did not have children together so there are no child support.
The shirt graphic is of the monopoly guy pulling both pockets out of his pants to signify he’s out of money.
To my knowledge, my GF never met the ex and I’m not sure she even knows the name of the ex. We meet after my brother’s divorce was finalized and we’ve been referring to his ex as the ex. We never used her name.
My GF parents are divorced and this was back in the day. I don’t know anything about their alimony or child support because she doesn’t talk about it and I don’t want to be pushy with a sensitive topic.
Here's what the top commenters had to say about this one:
Agile-Wait-7571 said:
He fulfilled his obligation. He did it in a timely fashion . Like any other financial obligation, he should celebrate its end. A student loan. A mortgage payment. NTA.
Nervous_Hippo8855 said:
If your brother wants it then NTA. Plenty of people have divorce parties.
Weak-Philosopher-962 said:
Nta but op remember to sign a prenup before you marry this one and DONT LET HER BE A STAY AT HOME ANYTHING!
Crimsonwolf_83 said:
NTA and you will want an iron clad prenup if you’re not breaking up with her.
Select-Pie6558 said:
NTA - when my (F) friend (F) divorced her awful husband I gave her a divorce present far more happily than her wedding gift. Support your people. Have fun.
United-Manner20 said:
NTA but this is showing some pretty big red flags. Sounds like she’s upset that you wouldn’t be open to paying her when you guys get divorced . She can’t claim Girl code because this happened before she was even around and it has nothing to do with her. Enjoy your trip and reconsider your relationship.