'AITA for kicking my BF and his kid out because his son was constantly scaring my baby?'
"AITA for kicking my BF and his kid out because his son was constantly scaring my baby?"
I was diagnosed with PPD so I'm not sure if this is playing a part in my actions or not. I've been with my BF for 6 years and he has a 12yo son "Jake". I have owned my home for nearly 10 years now. They moved in 2 years ago. Our daughter is 3 months old.
Now, Jake loves his sister. He's always holding her and trying to help. But there's been a massive issue since I had her with him purposely scaring her. Walking up to her and yelling "RA!"
He thinks it's hilarious when she does startle reflex's and then laughs when she cries, saying "aww I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare her like that" but continues laughing and continues purposely trying to scare her. At least 4x a day
Now, I have ALWAYS told him to cut the sh%t. I have told him several times that he is hurting her ears. I have told him several times that it's not funny. And then not even 3 days ago I lost my sh%t entirely and told my BF and him that if he purposely scared my kid again than they would be evicted and gone from my (constant) life.
I said this because while my BF does correct his kid sometimes, he also tells me I'm overreacting. He said that it's natural for kids to think it's funny when babies get startled and I simply don't understand because I've never been around multiple kids (his son has a half brother and apparently did the same thing with him when he was a baby).
But anyways, I lost it and threatened to kick them out and in that moment, I truly felt like an asshole because Jake looked sad and just went to his room.
But like...last night I stepped out of the room for a minute and my daughter was in her swing. Jake went to sit here and when I was out of the room, I heard Jake (very loudly and fast) say "What are you doing?" (In a baby voice) and my daughter start screaming immediately following.
I heard my boyfriend take of it. And then like an hour later I went to the bathroom and the baby was in her seat and I heard "RA" followed by the baby crying, yet again. So I told them to pack their sh%t and get out, now. I didn't wait for a response because now I'm trying to calm down my baby.
Jake tried apologizing and said it was a habit and my boyfriend start protesting, saying it's not a big deal and I just refused to acknowledge their excuses and told them to leave. My BF sat down on the chair, said he wasn't going anywhere and that this is his house too.
So I said I would leave then and have cops serve him an eviction notice. He tried begging me to calm down and kept saying "he's 12, what do you expect? he's not going to be perfect." I left and this morning I filed for their eviction.
Everyone thinks I'm being ridiculous here but Jake refuses to stop and I'm tired of him purposely yelling in my daughter's face to scare her 4+ times a day. ETA: I also have asked Jake why he does this and he has said he thinks it's funny when kids cry.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
TopAd7154 said:
NTA. "Yes. He's 12. Old enough to know better and to not do it. Old enough to listen to instructions." Would he like it if you startled him every morning? No. He's 12 but he's being an AH and it sounds almost sadistic.
ceebs87 said:
NTA. 12 is old enough to be able to control one's actions and he was warned multiple times. It is disturbing that the 12YO's favorite form of entertainment is scaring a baby, so much that it's an impulse.
His father is T A for being perfectly fine that his son has decided to pick on the most defenseless family member. Good for OP for protecting her daughter, that behavior is only going to get worse the more daddy downplays it.
DazeIt420 said:
NTA. The key detail is that Jake started to scare your baby when you left the room. It means that he is in control of his behavior. It means that he knows that you disapprove. That's not innocent child behavior, he is acting sneaky and duplicitous.
Straysmom said:
NTA. Jakes thinks it's funny to scare a baby & laughs when she cries. I would consider his behavior abuse. Especially since he's been told numerous times to stop. Even after being threatened with eviction, he still did it.
It almost seems like a power trip to him. Picking on a smaller person with the express intent of scaring them. It might be that he is jealous because he isn't getting all of the attention. Regardless, he needs help.
Gonebabythoughts said:
My son is 13 and would get away with this exactly once before the fear of MOM would be put into his little punk heart. Clearly he has no respect for you or your boyfriend as a parental figure. Why was he allowed to be alone in the room with the baby?
FAFO-13 said:
NTA. That kid is disturbed and it’s pretty sad that your boyfriend is taking his side over a defenseless infant. Throw them the f out and threaten to call the cops on that little b if he does it again, that’ll scare him.