'AITA for refusing to let my sister announce her pregnancy at my wedding after what she did?' UPDATED

"AITA for refusing to let my sister announce her pregnancy at my wedding after what she did?"

I (F30) got married last weekend, and it was supposed to be the happiest day of my life, but drama unfolded, and now my family is split in half. I need to know if I’m the a-hole or if my reaction was justified.

My younger sister (F27), let’s call her "Lucy," has always been the golden child of the family. She’s smart, beautiful, and has always been the center of attention, whether it’s her birthdays, graduations, or other significant life events. I’ve always felt like I was living in her shadow, but I’ve never said anything because, well… she’s my sister, and I love her.

Lucy got pregnant a couple of months ago, and while I’m genuinely happy for her, I was also relieved that my wedding day could finally be about me for once. No one overshadowing me. No unexpected news. Just me, my partner, and our big day.

A week before the wedding, Lucy called me, and during what I thought was a casual sisterly chat, she drops this bombshell: "Wouldn't it be amazing if I announced my pregnancy during your reception? It would be such a surprise!" She went on to explain that all of our family would be there, and she thought it would be "such a special moment" for everyone.

I was stunned. I told her politely but firmly that I didn’t think it was a good idea. I had spent months planning this day, and I wanted it to be about my husband and me, not a pregnancy announcement. Lucy said I was overreacting and being selfish. She said it wasn’t a big deal and that “everyone would be so happy.”

I reiterated my stance—NO announcement at my wedding. I thought that was the end of it. Fast forward to the reception. Everything was going beautifully. I was having the time of my life until I noticed Lucy looking a bit… smug? That’s when she tapped her glass for attention. My stomach dropped.

In front of all our guests, she stood up and announced her pregnancy anyway. The room erupted in cheers and congratulations. I was frozen in shock. It felt like a dream. People immediately swarmed her with hugs and questions, and suddenly, my wedding was no longer about me—it was about Lucy and her baby.

I was furious. My husband could see it, my bridesmaids could see it, and honestly, anyone paying attention could see I was upset. But I didn’t want to cause a scene, so I left the reception early, crying in the bridal suite. My husband tried to console me, but I was heartbroken.

Now, here’s where things get worse. The next day, Lucy texted me saying I was “being a drama queen” and that “everyone was happy for her.” My parents are taking her side, saying I should have “just let her have her moment” and that I’m being “immature” for being upset. But a few of my cousins and friends have reached out to tell me that they thought what Lucy did was selfish and wrong.

The family is now divided. Some say I’m overreacting, while others say Lucy was out of line. So, AITA for getting upset that my sister hijacked my wedding to announce her pregnancy?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

picnicbythesea says:

At her baby shower announced that you are pregnant even if you’re not.

Pretty865-Artwork says:

NTA. Go no contact with her and anyone on her side. She needs to learn her actions have consequences. Silence is your best response to all of them. F%#k people taking over YOUR PAID PARTY for their selfish bulls%#t.

RaymondBeaumont says:

Block the half that is mad at you. Leave the half that aren't a%#$oles. You will live a happier life.

Big_Zucchini_9800 says:

NTA the one rule on a wedding day is you do what the bride asks. You asked her not to steal your moment, she did it anyway.

lostinthought1997

Send her a bill for the party. She stole all the attention when you asked her not to, so now she can pay for it. NTA

Later OP came back with this update:

Hey, it’s me again, the one whose sister hijacked her wedding with a surprise pregnancy announcement. First of all, I just want to thank everyone who commented on my original post. I never expected it to go viral, and reading your responses really gave me some clarity. I figured I owed you all an update, especially since things have really escalated since then.

"What Happened After the Wedding":

So, after the wedding, I took a few days to cool down. I didn’t want to respond to any of the family drama immediately because, honestly, I needed some space to process everything. But Lucy and my parents kept pushing for a “resolution,” insisting that I should apologize for “storming out” of my own wedding and for “making a big deal out of nothing.”

I held firm, though. I told them how deeply hurt I was, how Lucy had completely disregarded my feelings and my boundaries. I tried to explain that it wasn’t just about the announcement—it was about years of feeling like I always came second to her.

Unsurprisingly, Lucy doubled down and kept calling me “dramatic” and “self-centered.” My parents were still on her side, repeating how “everyone was happy” and that I should “let it go.”

"Family Divide":

Now, here’s where things got even messier. My cousins and some extended family caught wind of what was going on (thanks, social media), and the family divide has gotten even wider. One of my cousins actually called Lucy out publicly, saying what she did was “attention-seeking and disrespectful.”

That led to a full-blown family argument in our group chat, with people picking sides. The weirdest part? Some family members who initially didn’t say much are now telling me they’ve always seen Lucy as “the golden child” too, and they’re glad someone finally spoke up.

Of course, this didn’t go over well with my parents. My mom told me I was “tearing the family apart” and that I needed to “put an end to this nonsense.” But I wasn’t the one who made it public, and I can’t control what other people say or think.

"The Breaking Point":

What really shocked me, though, was how my dad reacted. He’s usually the peacemaker, but he straight-up told me that I “ruined” Lucy’s big moment (her pregnancy announcement) and that I’m “holding a grudge for no reason.” That hurt more than I expected because I always thought he at least understood where I was coming from.

On top of that, my parents invited Lucy and her husband over for dinner a few nights ago, but they didn’t invite me. When I asked why, my mom said they “didn’t want any more drama.” So now, not only am I dealing with the emotional fallout from the wedding, but I’m also feeling like I’m being pushed out of my own family.

"Where I’m At Now":

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting, and honestly, I don’t think I can keep pretending everything’s okay just for the sake of keeping peace. I love my family, but I can’t keep sacrificing my feelings and self-respect just to avoid conflict. My husband has been super supportive through all of this, and he’s encouraged me to set clear boundaries with both my sister and my parents.

So, as hard as it is, I’ve decided to go low contact with Lucy and my parents for now. I’m not cutting them out completely, but I need space to heal and to figure out how (or if) I want to move forward with them. Some of my cousins have reached out to say they support me, and that’s been a huge comfort during all of this.

"Everything in a nutshell":

After my sister announced her pregnancy at my wedding despite me telling her not to, I’ve faced pressure from my family to apologize and move on. My parents have taken her side, and the family is more divided than ever. I’ve decided to go low contact with my sister and parents to protect my mental health. AITA for distancing myself after everything that happened?

Here's what people had to say after the update:

MsSpooncats

Absolutely NTA. I always hate suggesting LC or NC, but to be honest it sounds like the only option in this scenario if you wish to keep your self respect. What Lucy did was terrible, and the way your parents are taking her side is equally horrid. I would get closer to your cousins, they seem like your real family.

AdAccomplished6870

I would be so tempted to post

"Everyone, please stop arguing over this. As a result of people being upset that my wedding interfered with my sisters pregnancy announcement, I have now been uninvited to family events by my parents due to the drama I have created by not immediately apologizing for focusing too much of the wedding on my husband and I."

"This is my fault for not recognizing immediately what, and who, is important to the family. I was wrong to ask her to not hijack my wedding, I was wrong to be upset when she ignored my wishes, and I was wrong to not immediately apologize, as my parents have put it, for ruining her big moment at my wedding."

"My selfishness in thinking that the bride and groom should be the center of attention at their wedding clearly is due to my need for drama and my selfishness, I have been told. I want to make that right and ask that we only ever discuss life and her news."

"Thank you for your understanding and accept my apologies for my mistaken belief that other lives could exist, even just for a day."