'AITA for not having alcohol at my wedding?' 'We have a lot of guests that are BIG drinkers.'

"AITA for not having alcohol at my wedding?"

I (27 F) and my fiancé (27 M) are getting married in a few months. Of course, we are very excited about the wedding and starting planning for the wedding. I brought up the idea of not have alcohol at the wedding and my fiancé agreed.

We came up with this because it will be so much cheaper and we are not heavy drinkers. Mainly, we don’t want drunk guests messing up our big day (we have a lot of guests that are big drinkers to the point that they’ll get drunk).

Some of my family members have found out that we are having alcohol and started going all out on us (mainly me, of course). They are saying that I’m making the biggest mistake for not having alcohol for a toast and saying that people are going to leave the reception to go drink.

Let me add they’re personally going to bring it to the wedding, and even guilt tripping me to try to change my mind. I told them that doing this is very disrespectful to me and my fiancé for not respecting our wishes and possibly of not inviting them because of this. Now they’re saying I’m being an ahole. So AITA for not having alcohol at my wedding?

EDIT:

If someone brings alcohol, they’ll get kicked out of the venue since we said no because it’s their rule.

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

Neutral_Guy_9 said:

Obviously NTA. But you will have to make peace with having disgruntled guests. It’s like having a birthday party with no cake.

Traditional_Fan_2655 said:

NTA Have Welch's sparkling cider for the toast. It comes in white grapes and in red. If the people who tend to get drunk leave your reception to go drink, more power to them. As long as they aren't drunk AT your reception and stay at the bar, all is good.

SoMuchMoreEagle said:

NTA. It's your wedding and you can do as you like. But be aware that your family members might be right in that people may leave to go drink elsewhere. You can't control that.

But you should work extra hard to make sure that the rest of the party is fun. Good music, good food, good non-alcoholic drinks, etc. Weddings can be really dull and awkward, that's why people drink (one reason, anyway).

You could also consider having a small amount of alcohol, like two drink tickets per person and no hard liquor, bar closes an hour after dinner (or whatever you think is reasonable). Just an idea. But ultimately, it's your wedding and your decision. Just try not to get upset if the turnout isn't what you hoped or if people leave early.

shannorama said:

NTA but be prepared for it to be a short party. I didn’t have alcohol at my wedding and most of my guests left shortly after dinner.

taintedCH said:

NTA for organizing your wedding as you like. But bear in mind that people may not stay as long. The one dry wedding I went to, the guests mostly left after 1.5/2 hours.

RoyallyOakie said:

NTA...you can have whatever wedding you want. People who don't like it are free to decline the invitation with grace.