'AITA for not inviting my sister to my wedding?' 'She publicly criticized my fiancé.'
"AITA for not inviting my sister to my wedding after she publicly criticized my fiancé?"
My fiancé (28M) and I (26F) have been together for four years and recently got engaged. We’re planning a small, intimate wedding with just close friends and family. My sister (30F) has always been blunt, but I never expected her to take it this far.
A few months ago, during a family gathering, my sister got into a heated argument with my fiancé over something trivial (whether or not pineapple belongs on pizza). It escalated, and she ended up making rude comments about his character, calling him "weak" and saying he wasn’t good enough for me.
I thought it would blow over, but a few days later, my sister posted on Facebook, writing about how she’s worried I’m marrying “a man who has no backbone” and that I "deserve better." She didn’t name him directly, but it was obvious who she meant. Friends and family started reaching out, asking what was going on. It was humiliating.
When I confronted her, she refused to apologize and said she was just being honest. She even had the audacity to say I should "thank her" for "opening my eyes." Fast forward to now: our wedding is approaching, and my fiancé feels uncomfortable having her there. I decided not to invite her, and now it’s causing a huge rift in the family.
My parents are upset, saying that my sister is still family and should be there. My sister, of course, thinks I’m overreacting and "choosing him over family." She’s been texting me non-stop, saying she was just looking out for me, but I feel like if she really cared, she would’ve handled things differently. So, AITA for not inviting her to the wedding?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Turbulent_Ebb5669 said:
Weddings are supposed to be happy occasions not just another platform for someone to tear you down. NTA.
Endora529 said:
NTA. Why TF does she even want to go if she doesn’t like your fiancé? So she can show up and make snarky comments and give stupid looks? I’d ban her from wedding too. She’s a huge hypocrite for even wanting to go.
snugrosie said:
Why is it up to you to concede and not your sister? She’s the one that escalated it all. If your parents and family want her there, they can guilt trip her. NTA.
Proper-Foundation668 said:
NTA, text your sister back and tell her that you don't want her there and that you are simply being honest. If she responds in a nasty manner, tell her to stop overreacting. Also tell her that her not receiving an invite is simply a case of you looking out for your fiance.
Winternin said:
NTA. Your immediately family will soon be your fiance. Your sister is just an extended family member. Your sister has clearly crossed a line and it's completely justified she doesn't get to attend your wedding.
BadgerOk5391 said:
NTA. Your sister turned your wedding into a reality show with her honest comments about your fiancé. If she thinks calling him weak is looking out for you, she deserves a trophy for Worst Family Member of the Year. It’s your wedding, not a roast! If she can’t act like a decent human, she doesn’t get a VIP pass to your big day.
Apprehensive_War9612 said:
NTA. It's your wedding and contrary to what people will say, its not actually about “family.” Its about the couple, & those who love and support them showing up to support them. No one should be in attendance who lacks respect for either of you and who doesn’t support your union. Your sister’s behavior makes it clear she does not support your marriage and doesn’t respect either of you.