Pregnant woman shares horrifying saga of her malicious MIL. AITA? PART 2 OF 3 PART STORY; UPDATED 5X
When this woman is shocked to see that she has to take her MIL to court, she tells the internet:
Here is Part 2 of my horrifying story: MIL in court!?
Link to Part 1
I removed the text because my MIL's flying monkeys found this post and are harassing me about it. I don't hate you. Your children don't speak to you because you failed as a parent and wouldn't protect them from her. I refuse to have someone so toxic think they can dictate my life.
They aren't my biological children but I am still their mother. I'm leaving the comments because to normal people, family would never behave this way. You know what she did and you know she needs help. Denial will not make any of it go away.
we're working on an out of court settlement because Magda is desperate not to go to jail. When everything is wrapped up, I'll repost the story of what she did and the aftermath. Thank you for your well wishes and support.
UPDATE 1 OF PART 2:
Now that that the legal stuff has been settled, I can talk about this stuff. Get comfortable because this is long.
DH is the youngest of four sons. He's the oops baby, there is an 10 year age difference between him and BILs 2&3 (fraternal twins). Magda has always been resentful of him and made him the family scapegoat.
Her sons and the wives of BILs 2&3 are her devoted flying monkeys. SIL1 got sick of Magda's shit and filed for divorce after Her racist meltdown at me at the Super Bowl party.
What she did: DH was on an important business trip to Asia. His father passed away very shortly before 'the incident'. Since we are NC, DH did not attend the funeral. I attended at the request of FIL's sister, DHs favorite aunt, who has been NC with Magda since the 90s.
The only interaction with Magda's flying monkeys is when my SIL came over and talked shit for wearing a pantsuit and no makeup instead of following Magda's directions for attire. DH's aunt told her to go to hell. Magda and I did not interact at the funeral.
On Thursday, she goes to my youngest's school to pick him up (kidnap him). She is certainly not on the pickup list. She gets denied and blows up. The cops get called because she is screaming.
She tells the cops that I'm physically abusive and she wants to protect her grandchildren from me. She bites a cop and gets arrested. I don't know why they released her to one of my BILs pretty much immediately.
On Friday, she goes to my brother's shop with her GC grandson, where my oldest works part time. My brother tells her to leave. She starts screaming, my son comes out from the back to see what's going on.
Magda runs to him, embraces him in a death hug, crying and blubbering about how she can't just watch her family self-destruct. She will do anything to protect him, she's sorry she hasn't acted sooner to stop my violent rages. The cops come, Magda and GCGS take off. They peeled out of the parking lot in Magda's Mercedes.
On Sunday, the kids and I were at church and came home to a bunch of cop cars and animal control at our house. The cops told us that my MIL broke into the house, made a mess, and killed my elderly, 12 pound, little dog. This sent our 75 and 90 pound pitbulls into a fury, mauling her.
The neighbor heard the screaming, saw the broken window and Magda's car in the driveway (lol why Magda?) connected the three, and called the cops. The cops tased the dogs to get them to stop attacking her. Magda was rushed to the hospital. She picked up hospital acquired pneumonia.
We were told that she had bites on 60% of her body but that was a dramatic over statement. She had bites on her face, neck, forearms and hands. She also broke her hip, had her front teeth knocked out, and cracked some ribs from falling.
The inside of the house was thrashed. Broken mirrors, picture frames, dishes strewn everywhere. My art studio was a mess. Thankfully the kids rooms were unscathed EXCEPT for the massive pile of shit on the rocker in the baby's room. As I'm cleaning up, I notice everything destroyed was mine.
The photo frames smashed were of my family members. The dishes she destroyed were dishes I bought back from Mexico. The chair she shat on I bought. She opened all the drawers in the master bedroom and destroyed most of my clothes with scissors and bleach, including my wedding suit.
She destroyed all of my makeup, worth thousands of dollars because I have a Sephora problem. She stuffed all my makeup brushes, a hair brush, and my flat iron in the toilet.
We got the dogs back after a couple of days. The shelter staffed remarked how docile and well mannered they were. Since then, they do not let me or the baby out of their sight. If I put the baby down for a nap, my female stands watch next to the crib. I appreciate it but they are constantly under my feet.
Magda is completely unrecognizable now. There is no amount of plastic surgery to make her resemble her former self. Getting knocked down on the pavement broke her hip, cracked ribs, and knocked out her front teeth.
Speaking is excruciatingly painful due to her facial injuries and since her hands were badly injured, she can't text or email her vitriol either. She is completely dependent on others for her care, eating, toileting, dressing, turning over in bed, everything requires assistance. Her house is now a mini rehab hospital instead of the sterile museum it was previously.
When I made my previous post, SIL2 and SIL3 blew up my phone with abusive texts. They blew up the kids phones with abusive texts. Someone called CPS anonymously saying that I was letting kids drink and do drugs in the house. They also said i would leave the baby with the kids while I went and got high on meth. CPS came to our house.
They spoke to each of the kids privately. The kids described Magda's campaign of harassment since I announced my pregnancy. The CPS worker thanked us for our time. Our house is clean, there's tons of food in the house, and the kids are obviously well cared for. We haven't heard back from them.
I got an anonymous email saying I needed to delete my Reddit thread or I was going to get raped the next time I walked my dogs alone, So I deleted the post. My nephew, Luis (patron saint of garden hoses) tracked the IP address down to golden grandson's office park.
He denied it when called out and then I should go back to Mexico if I don't feel safe in LA. I found the contact information for golden grandson's boss and forwarded her the email with a short explanation of what happened. She likes to donate major sums of money to domestic violence shelters and advocacy groups.
After an internal review, golden grandson was found to have sent that email from his work station. He's been fired. His father called DH, ranting about destroying the family, DH stayed stone faced, thanked him to expressing his thoughts and told him to f off.
DH has really exploited on Magda's desperation to stay out jail. He had to leave a very important business trip to deal with his mother after he went NC (for real, he wouldn't come home from his father's funeral).
He told me when he was on the plane coming home, he thought about all the times he compromised to please her and it meant nothing. He thought about how his brothers' children are not only NC with Magda, they're NC with their parents too. With everything at stake, he just didn't want to lose everything.
He got back at her using the thing she cared about most after her looks, money. We gave her lawyer two weeks to mull over the evidence.
We have the video footage of her vandalizing our home, the text message logs, all of the emails, sworn statements from her grand daughters she visited on her east coast trip, and copies of the reports when she make a fallacious reports to immigration and the health department getting my brothers shop raided.
We told her lawyer she can settle out of court or we can go to trial with a guarantee of a civil lawsuit afterwards. The evidence was so damning, our lawyer was practically jizzing his pants to represent it.
So she settled. We're still in shock because Magda never rolls over. We are receiving a substantial amount of money and other assets. There is a binding agreement that Magda is not to contact us or any members in my family directly or via proxy, if she violates this, we will sue her again.
The same goes for DH's brother's and SIL2 & SIL3. The inheritance DH's brothers were promised as a reason to endure their mother's emotional abuse will not be there due to the high cost of her care and paying out the settlement. She has an RN and nurse assistant there 24/7. Her life is gone.
She's in constant pain, bedbound, and cared for by brown people who converse amongst themselves in a different language. Her sons aren't helping the way she wants, but her care requires skilled nursing so they can only do so much. BIL3 is a physician, but a radiologist. I don't think he's seen a patient in person in decades.
Magda's sister called my daughter to chastise her for refusing to speak with Magda, telling her that she shouldn't let her step-mother poison her against her blood family. Daughter lost it. She told her great aunt everything that happened. She also told her that her step-family is her family.
My parents spend time with her and are interested in what she has to say. My father volunteers at her soccer club instead of sitting, looking bored in the stands like Magda (and calls it 'volunteering').
My parents have never bad mouthed her father because they love him. Twisting the knife, she said she feels more like a [my surname] than a [DH's surname]. That conversation ended with, "You can twist the truth to suit your own reality, I guess, since that's what you people do." This girl, that snark is strait from my mouth.
There are family members who believe his brothers story of my sending the dogs to attack Magda when she came over to talk through our differences. My kids are taking this hard.
Summer is here so at least the kids will stay busy. The boys have part time jobs and my daughter is playing two sports. They're more serious and guarded. But at least they're throwing themselves into their hobbies.
We haven't decided if we want to stay in this house. I have a sentimental attachment as this is my aunt's house. We bought when because she was retiring to Mexico. It started out as a three room shack and slowly morphed into a fairly large house. My uncle was an excellent carpenter/tile layer/mason.
Some of my happiest childhood memories are here. I wanted my kids to have happy memories here. Also, if I wanted a house comparable to this we would have to leave the area. This Magda bullshit has tainted this house.
When I look at the backyard, I don't see the memory of my youngest slowly dog paddling around the pool after he learned how to swim, I replay the video footage of my insane MIL beating my dog to death with a crowbar in my mind
So that's where we're at. Again, ladies and gentledudes of JNM, your stories and supportive comments helped me keep my cool. I wouldn't have handled this ish as well in my own.
UPDATE 2 OF PART 2:
Inspired baby napping threads, I present to you a Magda story via one of her estranged granddaughters.
Magda was a third spouse in her children's marriages. So naturally she was in the delivery room, named the baby, and was involved in all parenting decisions.
DIL comes home the hospital with the baby boy. Magda comes over, demands baby so DIL complies and goes to take a long shower because Magda wanted time to 'bond'.
While DIL is in the shower, Magda told her son that she wanted to show off the baby to her friends and HE SAID YES. The oldest sibling, Magda's #1 scapegoat (the person telling me the story), had a meltdown, she didn't want Magda taking her brother.
She was so afraid Magda was going to make good on her often said promise she was going to steal the baby forever. Her father spanked her for being disrespectful to Magda and she was sent to her room.
Later, while the baby was still gone, his sister caught her mother crying but denied it. When she asked why Magda took the baby, her mom told her Magda loves her brother and it's important that they have bonding time. This is why all of Magda's granddaughters and one of her grandsons is no contact with her AND their parents.
UPDATE 3 OF PART 2:
Edit to add, this happened a long time ago. When my husband's oldest brother got together with his (soon to be ex) wife, she had a three year daughter. Magda, at first, was delighted as she had no bio grandchildren yet. she wanted a doll to dress up. Since my BIL and SIL are spineless, they let Magda do whatever she wanted.
Step granddaughter (SGD) wasn't a girly girl. She liked jeans, toy trucks, and getting dirty. Magda insisted that she wear dresses and have tea parties. Eventually, Magda made it her duty to other and shame SGD. Nothing that little girl did was ever good enough.
When my SIL had her son (golden grandson who sent me anonymous rape threats), Magda latched on to him and made sure to ignore SGD as much as possible. By the time SGD was about eight, she was not allowed in Magda's house if she wasn't wearing a dress.
Magda kicked her out of the house before Thanksgiving dinner when she was 13 because she wanted to wear jeans. Dresses only in Magda's house didn't apply to her bio granddaughters.
This became a bigger issue once SGD was starting high school. She was presenting herself very masculinely and was became successful in ahletics.
Magda was insistent that SGD needed therapy because she wouldn't conform to traditional gender norms. SGD went to therapy with conservative therapist affiliated with her ultra conservative Catholic Church three times a week.
Her bastard younger brother, on Magda's order, stole her diary and gave it to Magda. Magda read her diary out loud at Easter dinner. She outed her as a lesbian and gave her brother a new entertainment system for his bedroom. Magda decided that she needed to go to gay conversion camp because having this butch lesbian in her family was unacceptable.
My other nieces and nephews saw this happening and it really scared them. They avoided SGD's brother because they were afraid that he would tell Magda something to make her send them away too. Magda made pitting her grandchildren against each other an art. I'm surprised they are close as adults.
SGD was gone for a whole year. Her parents told everyone that got was accepted last minute as a foreign exchange student in Mexico. She really was in Mexico, but not in Monterey with a nice family.
She was in a torture camp in the jungles of Sinaloa with a bunch of other rich gay kids. she came back 30 pounds lighter, dead eyes in the eyes, and a broken ankle.
SGD knew it was just easier to give in than to fight. She bid her time until she turned 18. She wore the dresses, took the medications, stayed home, and tried to keep a low profile.
She took off on her 18th birthday and hasn't spoken to her parents since. There is a photo from the first family dinner after she got back. She's wearing a very femme outfit, hair and nails done with eyes in a far off galaxy. That photo always put me off because she looks so out of it, it's the first thing you see in the photo.
I just learned of this delightful piece of family history. I knew she was No contact with her mom and step father, but she also went No contact with her father for signing the papers to send her away.
She was always close with DH because of their shared SG status. DH also babysat her frequently. Magda would volunteer his time to babysit her while they did family stuff. This kept two scapegoats out of family outings.
How this came up is that I was asking for advice with my youngest. He's gay, 13 years old, and has sustained emotional damage from Magda. I see him struggle and don't really know how to help him. He's only come out to my uncle. Thankfully, SGD is wise and gave me some excellent insights.
Examples of Magda's cruelty for you llamas: At family dinners, when everyone else was eating off china and silver, Magda would set SGD's place with corelle and plastic cups. Magda would only buy her high end sports equipment/clothes in pink. the $450 soccer shoes were nice but they came in other non-pink colors.
Magda forbade my BIL and SIL to get SGD confirmed. Magda doesn't think gay people should be allowed to be Catholics. Magda made my BIL and SIL reimburse her for the of the camp because SGD didn't stop being a lesbian.
Magda paid one of her friend's grandsons to go on a dat with SGD after she got home. SGD went because she had no choice, gross dude kicked her out of the car when she declined to blow him. She walked home four miles.
Magda is still confined to bed. She's been healing nicely but still is 100% dependent on others for her care. I know it's wrong but my heart flutters when I call my lawyer for updates. We've gotten the first wave of settlement money so we're getting serious work done.
UPDATE 4 OF PART 2:
I got a bunch of messages for people asking for an update. Luis received a call from one of our cousins, asking why a beige Toyota Camry is following me around. I drive by his shop frequently because it's a couple of blocks away from my house.
He noticed it a few weeks ago but wanted to make sure, just in case. He gave Luis the license plate number and I gave it to our lawyer.
Before the lawyer gets back to us, I get a call from one of Magda's caregivers. He tells me Magda has convinced herself that I'm plotting to murder her and my BILs with cartel assassins.
She's hired private security at the house and private investigators to follow me around. The private security pats them down, checks their bags, and waves a metal detector wand at them. The investigator comes three times a week and brings stacks of photos.
I don't know him, but he's a regular customer of my older brother's tattoo parlor where my oldest works part-time. He recognized him from photos in Magda's house. My phone number is still in Magda's phone which is how he got a hold of me. He said he was concerned for my safety because this crazy old rich lady has it in for me.
Lawyer calls back, confirming beige Toyota belongs to shady PI company. Lawyer tells them they are participating in violating a restraining order and reports it to the police. As expected, the police do nothing because the investigators did not make contact with me. Lawyer is taking care of it.
I feel violated in every way possible. I don't feel safe in my home and I don't feel safe in public. I was willing to stay and remodel the house but this is some next level BS. I don't know if I'm truly okay with being so geographically close to my husband's bat shit family.
My daughter stopped playing club soccer because of bullying. A bunch of Magda's friends volunteer for the club and their granddaughters have shut my daughter out socially. Magda's #1 golden grandson's teenage SIL also plays for this soccer club and has gleefully led the campaign to shut out my daughter.
What hurt her the most was when they called her a race traitor when they heard her speaking Spanish. They sent her really fd up shit via SnapChat. I'm so upset for her because she has a very promising soccer career ahead of her. She was being scouted and I worry she won't have the same exposure if she's just playing for her school.
In other news, my BILs and Magda are suing us. DH is handling those details. He told me this is a classic rich people thing to do, fight with family members via lawyers for years. Magda regrets settling with us out of court so she intends on bleeding us dry with lawyer fees.
Joke's on her because we don't give a shit. We make plenty of money ourselves to support our family. The money and assets obtained from suing Magda is just extra. If we spent all that money on lawyers fighting her, so be it. I really wish dealing with her crazy ended when my dogs mauled her.
UPDATE 5 OF PART 2:
After finding out I was being followed by someone paid by my psychotic MIL, I left LA and a holed up at DH's uncles ranch. It's so nice to feel like I have privacy, but I miss my husband and big kids.
Uncle has assured me that my BILs are not allowed on his property. I've been sleeping better here than I have in almost two years. I told DH that that I'm coming home approximately when I fg feel like it.
Even though I grew up poor, I went to a very expensive private school on scholarship. My sister was the housekeeper for the chair of the alumni association and she somehow talked him into getting me into the school on scholarship.
I went to this school and thrived. I was popular and did well in sports. I made a lot of friends that I'm still close with. My connections I made there helped get me into a good college on scholarship, and later helped me land jobs after I finished grad school.
I was helping DH's aunt move some stuff around in their guest house and there was a framed photo in the wall of uncle and FIL playing golf at their country club, which triggered a memory. Magda has been a shit to me the entire time I've known her.
On the first trip back to California after DH and I got together so our families could meet each other, we went to lunch with Magda. As we're waiting for her, one of my friends from high school was coming out of the restaurant, so we stop to chat. When Magda walks up to us, she has this weird look in her face, interrupts my friend in mid sentence, demanding how we know each other.
Magda and FIL belong to the same country club as my friend's parents. Friend looks at Magda like she's totally insane. Before she could answer, Magda asks if I was her drug dealer. Friend looks genuinely horrified and tells Magda no, we went to (school) together.
Magda feigns surprise and asked me how my parents afforded it. Friend rolls her eyes, leans in to hug me, whispers "Don't marry him. His mother is awful" and almost ran off to her car.
That weekend, their country club was having their annual pancake breakfast fundraiser for the Shriners, FIL was the event chair. We go because FIL asked very nicely and DH wanted to introduce me to his parents friends.
I wore an appropriate outfit. Magda said I looked embarrassing and dowdy. If I had worn something more flattering, I knew she would say I was dressed inappropriately.
We get there and Madga instantly has CBF. She was annoyed that we didn't bring the kids. The kids were at Luis' house playing with his kids. When asked, the two oldest didn't want to go because going anyplace with Magda means uncomfortable clothes and being nagged to sit still.
Magda was pissed that she couldn't play GMOTY in front of her friends. she kept introducing me using a diminutive of my name (very Anglo sounding) that nobody has ever called me. Bless DH, he corrected her every time, queue more CBF.
My friend I saw at lunch was there with her parents and husband. I'm talking to them, Magda butts in and saccharine-sweet asks them how they know me (using name nobody calls me). Friends mom looks confused and Magda points at me.
"Daughter and [my actual name]went to high school together." Friend's Mom turns to me, grabs my hand and says, "You were my favorite of [friend]'s friends. I know your influence kept [friend] out of trouble. If you two were hanging out together, I didn't worry.
Thank you again for setting me up with Luis, my yard has never looked better." Magda's CBF could be seen from space.
Friend's mom sees one of her friends and takes me away from Magda for introductions. The more people friend's mom introduces me to, the more angry Magda looks.
Friend's mom introduces me to a very well-known Mexican soap opera actor, I see Magda making a beeline to DH out of the corner of my eye and she's looking at me while pointing her finger in his face.
As soon as I'm alone, Magda grabs my arm and pulls me to a quiet corner. "Know your place," she hissed. "You are just a temporary comfort. People like us, are on another level from people like you. You might have conned your way into (private high school) but I will never let you in this family." She squeezed my arm so tightly it left a bruise.
As soon as we're in the car on the way home, DH told me that Magda isn't comfortable with how I was all over [Mexican Soap Star] in front of her friends. She told me that it wasn't a good idea to let the kids meet me so soon. If we got married, i wouldn't love him like his late-wife did (late wife was an asshole of epic proportions, but was Magda's doormat).
Which then reminded me of: A few days later, we have a family dinner with Magda, FIL, DH's siblings and families. I can't remember what we talked about but it was all a series of little jabs at me. I went outside to get some fresh air.
Magda's cook comes outside (she still works for Magda BTW). With a low quiet voice, in Spanish, she asks if I love DH. When I respond yes, she told me to keep him in Florida, if we move back to California, Magda will do everything she can to destroy my life.
She then told me that Magda ordered her housekeeper to remove all the valuable things from downstairs because she was worried I would steal from her. She said she could tell I was a good mother to DH's children and she could see I was a kind and patient person by the way I responded when Magda repeatedly insulted me.
After this trip, Magda decided I was a an uneducated, illegal immigrant out for DH's money. It pisses me off all over again that his brothers just went with it. I'm thankful to Magda's domestic staff who have always been decent, hardworking people taking pity on me. It feels weird to be that person.
I've been with DH for over a decade and her lifestyle is still totally foreign. I still feel like I'm pretending when we go do rich people stuff with his family like sitting in the first section at Laker Games or attending museum fundraisers. I hope they all fuck off and get incurable skin fold fungal infections.
UPDATE 5 OF PART 2:
I've been using the same photographer for family photos for years. He's the younger brother of the other scholarship kid at our fancy private high school. He's fairly successful now and easy to find on the internet. We have worked on many projects together over the years and are facebook friends. He's aware of the Magda related drama.
You can order prints from my photographer's website using an access code. Magda years ago had the code because she paid for our wedding photos. A few days ago, she logs in and places a huge order of photos.
Specifically, none of the photos with me in them. She ordered nearly one hundred prints of my daughter's quinceañera (sweet 15 party) and the family photos we took for this year's christmas card.
Thankfully one of his office people called to confirm the address for the photos and offered to personally deliver them because shipping would get expensive for the larger prints. Magda had ordered a poster sized print of my youngest big kid on the dance floor with the baby.
My stomach absolutely turned. I explained that my mother-in-law was a psycho and she needed to have her access revoked. In the spirit of JNM, I instructed the lovely admin to refund her money and send an equal amount of prints of me.
It was expensive but it felt good, so worth it. I wonder how she felt when she got the poster size print of a particularly unflattering photo of both of us, taken at my wedding.
Magda receives the photos and sends BIL3 to confront DH. BIL3 comes to our house while DH and Luis are working on the front yard. They start arguing and DH tells him he's going to call th e cops. The sole reason I'm posting this is because Luis got BIL3 with the garden hose.
Like with Magda, Luis hosed BIL3 to his SUV and got a ton of water in the interior. I wasn't able to witness it in person but it was caught on our security cameras. BIL3 and DH are arguing, waving their arms around and Luis comes around the corner AND BAM, full on soaking with the sprayer. We have a long driveway so having the hose on full blast for 80 feet feels like an eternity.
I'm getting better at dealing with this bullshit. I decided to come back home because I missed my family. We're fixing the house up and moving to Northern California. I decided to resign from my job and focus on freelance work.