New mom evicts fiancé after uncovering Snapchat affair and custody plot. 'AITA for ruining my husband's life?'
'AITA for ruining my husband's life?'
I (25F) have been with my fiancé (26M) for almost ten years. Our relationship wasnt perfect but it felt strong and steady. Last November we had our first baby and I became a stay at home mom like we both planned.
I had good savings from working hard and saving young so the idea was my savings would cover baby stuff and his paycheck would handle bills.Everything is under my name, both cars and the condo.
My car and the condo are all paid off. Only his car has payments left but I put half down on it and got a low rate cause my credit was good. I always planned to pay it off fully when I went back to work. But right now I am still healing from birth cause I had sepsis after my c-section and other complications. Giving birth almost killed me.
Last week I got cleared at my postpartum check up. I was so excited to finally feel better and was ready to be close to him again. When I got home that night while he was in the shower, I grabbed his phone off the bed and went to our spare room to make him a surprise.
I had just bought some cute underwear and I was going to take a few pictures on his phone, then when he got out the shower, i would ask him if he could send me a picture he took earlier of the baby and then he would be met with these pictures surprisingly in his camera role.
I unlock his phone and open the camera, and in the bottom corner, where a preview of the last picture in your camera roll is in a little box, was a picture of a woman I didn't know.
I didn't see much because its only a square and not the full image but when i looked at it, it was a selfie this woman took on my husband's phone in his car. I am immediately sick to my stomach because this was from today he only told me he went to work and the gym that day and they were not wearing gym clothes in the picture.
I might be an AH here because instead of talking to him and asking I didn't want him to get the chance to delete any evidence, so I looked through his camera role, nothing else, looked through his messages nothing else no emails in the trash, nothing. I was confused and at this point was going to give up searching.
The I remembered that he deleted instagram from his phone because he was spending too much time on it but still logs in on his computer when we wants to use it (it helps him not be on it so much) so I go to the play store (app store) to see if I can download insta and him still be logged in on this device.
When I got o the instagram I see that Snapchat was the last app that he downloaded, confused because we have never have used snapchat. You can guess where this is going.
I logged in to his snap with his phone, at this point I'm rushing because I hear the shower turn off but he is shaving and listening to a podcast through Alexa. And yep, I found videos of them, messages between them. He did not save any so only the ones from today were visible.
I couldn't believe he was cheating on me. Further up, I found a few random saved messages that she saved He was planning to get child support from me somehow and have his parents raise our baby. He was also talking about trying to take the condo and the cars. I felt like my heart stopped.
I deleted snapchat, put the phone back on the bed, grabbed the baby and went to the bedroom and just cried. I couldn't believe what I saw. That night I sent a recording I took on my phone of some of the evidence to his parents while he was sleeping.
In the morning his phone was blowing up and he got up and started screaming at me. Slamming doors, punching the walls, calling me every name. He forgot we got cameras all over the house too so all of it was caught on video.
He said I ruined his life and his parents were cutting him off. He said I had no right to record him and that I would regret it. He threatened to take everything I have. I told him to go ahead and try.
I already talked to a lawyer. We aren't married legally where we live and since everything is in my name he has no claim. I told him he has till the end of the month to get out.
His family has been really supportive to me since all this happened. Mine don't even know yet. He keeps calling and texting and even emailing and writing letters begging me to work it out.
I changed the locks and the garage code. I don't wanna work it out. I just want him gone. I gave everything to this man and he threw it away like trash. For the people wondering, I am a traveling registered medical diagnostic sonographer. That is how I was able to afford a condo and two cars by 25. I have been working since I was 15 and saving everything. My cars are used too, not brand new.
Here is what readers had to say in response to the OP’s post:
He is the one who did this and thank goodness you found out before he tried anything sneaky. NTA. And omg, he planned to make his parents take care of the baby? He is a major douche.
HE is the one that ruined his own life. These are the consequences of his actions.
NTA. I love it a woman comes with the receipts. And everything is in your name. Yes mam !! Very classy. Very diva of you Queen. Lucky you know now, before that vampire of a husband tried to ruin your life and your baby too. What an ass!
NTA! He sounds like a narcissist. Especially blaming you for his actions, not taking any accountability, punching holes in walls, and planning on taking your property and extorting money, while cheating on you?!? Girl, bye!
Watch out for his family. Seriously. He got it from his mom or dad or both. They're mad because he embarrassed them, not because they're disappointed. They could be feigning support to try using it against you later. I was in a similar situation.
NTA he ruined his own life. Glad you found out now. Better sooner than later. He has no legal claim to your condo or cars.