'AITA for telling my cousin she’s a horrible guest?' 'She ruined my wedding day.'

"AITA for telling my cousin she’s a horrible guest after she ruined my wedding day?"

So, I (F28) just got married last weekend. It was a small, intimate wedding with just close family and a few friends. I’ve been planning this wedding for a long time and honestly, I thought it was gonna be perfect. But then my cousin Tina (F30) shows up and completely ruins everything.

I’ve always had a complicated relationship with Tina. She’s the type of person who thinks the world revolves around her and she always has to be the center of attention. She’s been like this her whole life, but I didn’t expect her to mess up my wedding day, of all days.

So, Tina shows up at the wedding, and already I can tell she’s in a bad mood. She’s barely talking to anyone, acting all standoffish, and when she does talk, she’s complaining about the food, the music, and even the decorations—all in front of other guests. Like, who does that? But I tried to brush it off, because hey, it’s my big day, I don’t wanna stress over her drama.

But then, the worst thing happens. During the ceremony, Tina starts making loud comments while I’m walking down the aisle. Like, out loud in front of everyone. She’s saying stuff like, “Wow, this dress is really too big for her,” and “Why would she choose that ugly flower arrangement?” I can literally hear her, and I’m trying not to lose it while I’m walking down the aisle.

I thought maybe she was just having a bad day or something, so after the ceremony, I try to talk to her. I pull her aside, and I’m like, “Tina, what’s going on? You’re acting really rude, and it’s my wedding day.” She snaps at me and says, “Well, it’s not MY fault this wedding is so boring and basic.” BASIC?! Are you kidding me?? I’ve spent months planning this, and she’s calling it basic in front of everyone?

I was honestly so mad, but I tried to keep my cool. I told her, “Listen, you need to either shape up or leave because this attitude is ruining my day.” And then she goes, “Fine, I’ll leave,” like she’s doing me a favor.

But guess what? She doesn’t leave. She goes and gets a drink, and then she proceeds to start talking trash about me and my wedding to other guests. I overheard her telling some of my aunts that I’m “too uptight” and “this wedding is a joke.”

At that point, I’m DONE. I went up to her and told her that she was being a horrible guest and that if she wasn’t going to be respectful, she needed to leave. I said, “I’m not gonna let you ruin my wedding, Tina. If you don’t like it, you can go.” She got super upset, started crying, and was like, “You’re making me out to be the bad guy!”

She ended up leaving, but not before making a scene. She was crying in the parking lot, calling me a “bridezilla” and saying I was ruining our family relationship over something so “stupid.”

Now my whole family is mad at me. They’re telling me I overreacted and that I shouldn’t have kicked her out, even though she was literally ruining my wedding day. My mom says that “family is family” and that I should’ve “just let it slide.”

But like…no, this was MY day and she was disrespecting me and my husband the whole time. So, AITA for telling my cousin she’s a horrible guest and kicking her out of my wedding?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

xsweetbbyqueen said:

NTA at all. Your wedding, your rules. Tina was mad disrespectful, and you handled it way better than most would. Family or not, she deserved to get called out. Stay unbothered.

roonalone said:

NTA...It's the "let it slide" attitude that made Tina the insufferable person she is. You shouldn't have to sacrifice your big day for someone who can't even act civilized. Glad you stuck up for yourself.

Bigolbooty75 said:

NTA but it’s a lose lose situation. Also go low contact with people justifying her behavior. You don’t need people like that around.

gaius-rainheart said:

NTA. Why she is so focused on staying if she hates everything? And you should not letting it slide, if standing up for yiurself let alone on your special day means ruining a family realtiinship that means she was not really family to begin with. Your mum is slightly AH for guilting you, no one should be direspected that way.

appleblossom1962 said:

NTA. You asked for one day, one perfect day all about you and your husband. Tina came in and messed that all up and created bad memories whereas it should have been as perfect as perfect could be.

Don’t let your family gaslight you to believe that you did anything wrong, she never should’ve been invited in the first place and I hope that if and when you do become pregnant and have a baby shower, you do not invite her. Congratulations on the nuptials.

lapsteelguitar said:

You should have kicked her out earlier. And if she’s in the audio track of the wedding video, send her the bill. NTA.

RIfanatic said:

YTA because it seems you at least knew it was gonna happen. Oh well, better luck at your next wedding.