'AITA for tricking my parents into being on time for my wedding?' UPDATE 2 YEARS LATER
"AITA for tricking my parents into being on time for my wedding?"
My (M33) parents are late for everything. Like everything. Both of my sister's and myself have been disappointed so many times. Graduation ceremonies, birthday parties, even my father's retirement dinner. It is completely my mother's fault. She is a wonderful mother and I love her dearly, she just does not understand the concept of punctuality.
I have seen her talking to her sister on the phone and reminded her she needed to be at my baby sister's dance recital. She waved me off and arrived after my sister had danced. We are all used to it. My dad is just done trying to get her to be on time for anything.
My now wife (F28) told me in no uncertain terms that if my mother was late for our wedding she would do terrible things to me. She was only half joking. But she was a witness to my mom and dad arriving halfway through my cousin's quinceañera.
So here is what I did. It is completely on me. Me wife was not involved. If there is a d%*# move it was completely mine.
When we were getting samples for the wedding I talked to the printer and had one special invitation printed with the time on it stated s being one hour earlier than the actual start time of the ceremony.
My mother was beside herself apparently when they left the house and thought they were going to miss the wedding since she was a part of it with her and my MIL lighting the candles we would use to light the unity candle and stuff.
When she arrived and noticed other people were also just arriving and parking she was so relieved that we were starting late that she just went with it. The ceremony went off beautifully. And so did the wedding pictures and the reception.
The problem came last Sunday. My parents came over for a big family dinner and we didn't bother starting the grill until they showed up. She asked why everyone wasn't eating and we just said we knew we would be waiting for them since they are always late.
She said that she was not always late and had been on time for my wedding. She hadn't been. They arrived 45 minutes AFTER the time on their invitation.
My idiot cousin John, real name because it's common and he deserves people to know he is a dolt, snorted at her statement. A few other people giggled or smiled at this and she picked up and asked what was so funny.
I came clean and told her about the "special" invitation. She is pissed at me for not trusting her and making her look foolish in front of everyone. If my cousin had just controlled himself she never would have known. AITA,?
Edits from OP:
Part of the reason she is mad is because she had her invitation framed. To be honest I was already planning a heist with my sisters to replace it with the real one in case she ever noticed the discrepancy between hers and the one we have framed in our home.
Yeah we are Latinos. And no I do not in any way consider it bad how many of you guessed that.
Here's what people had to say after the initial post:
NTA - How can she complain? If you had sent her an invite with the real time then she would have been 45 minutes late. She should appreciate the fact that you wanted her to be there enough that you took the time to make her a special invite to ensure she arrived on time.
NTA. She is embarrassed because she has a problem showing up on time and you proved it.
Just keep repeating that she was 45 minutes late. Flat out tell her that had you not lied to her, she would have missed your wedding and that not only will you never apologize for doing what you did, YOU want an apology from her for being 45 minutes late in the first place. NTA
2 years later OP came back with this update:
My parents have been embarrassed for two years now because of how I tricked them into being on time for my wedding. Pretty much every time I see them they say I was a d^%# not to trust them.
Our church is very busy and full of young people. So lots of weddings. To the point where there are three weddings every Saturday all summer long. One at 10, one at noon, and one at 3. Sometimes, but not often there is also an evening wedding.
My little sister just got married. She snagged the noon slot. My mom got super involved in planning the wedding to prove that I'm just an immature asshole. She said that she would be on time and not miss anything.
Side note. I personally hate when people clink glasses to get the bride and groom to kiss. At our wedding people had to sing a song. My cousin John has no shame and sang like ten times. I think people were bribing him with alcohol.
I set up a betting pool for kisses depending on how late my parents were. It cost $10 and if you guessed within five minutes you got a free pass to make my sister and her husband kiss.
Almost everyone bet "on time" because of the disaster at my wedding.
The correct answer was 25 minutes. Only me, my d^$# cousin John, and his sister Yvonne got free passes for the kissing. And I bet $100. I was confident.
We raised almost $1,500 for the honeymoon with my stupid idea. And I got to interrupt my sister's from eating with my ten passes.
Win win.
Except for my mom who thinks I did it to embarrass her.
She literally helped plan the wedding and was still late. By over half an hour. We were literally cleaning up the decorations in my sisters colors while the next wedding was decorating after us.
So that's that. My mom will never change. But I have harnessed her inability to give a s$#@ about punctuality for the good of humanity.
See you whenever my littlest sister gets married. Later.
Here's what people had to say after the update:
I love that idea! Sounds like a great wedding. Your mom needs to lighten up. NTA
NTA. Remember to do the same thing for littlest sister’s wedding. She deserves a nice honeymoon too.
That sounds SO petty. I love it. It's a great way to make your point, and your sister & hubby benefit, and everybody had a good time with it.
OP you’re genius lol.