Woman asks if it's 'weird' that her BF's family is constantly at their apartment.

Intercultural relationships are hard. Customs are different throughout the world and even in different parts of the same country. People seldom realize how geography impacts how customs surrounding food, family, and living style materialize. That's why dating somebody from a different culture might be a culture shock.

On a popular Reddit thread in the Am I the A*#hole Subreddit, a woman just can't get used to the norms of her boyfriend's family.

She writes:

I (F, 24) recently moved in with my boyfriend; let's call him John (M, 24). John is from India, has moved to the US for college, and now works. We live in his apartment in NYC, but over the past few months since I moved in. I've noticed a weird issue. While Johns's family is based in India, several of his family members have shifted to NYC in the past couple of years for school, work, etc.

About five of them live in the city. I am unsure of his specific relationship with each one, but he treats them all like siblings despite an age range of 18-32 between the five of them, with none of them being his real sibling.

The problem began when I realized his family members show up to the apartment whenever they feel like it, they all have keys, and they all come in and out throughout the week. Sometimes randomly stay the night in the guest room, come over to watch TV, or make some food, even when John and I are not home.

This was incredibly jarring for me because it felt like there was no privacy left to be within the house when all these people could just come in, borrow things, use the apartment, and leave. It's not that they made a mess or broke things, but they were using our apartment as their own.

Yesterday I had come home, and one of his younger 'sisters,' around 19, was cooking something in the kitchen, and having had a long tiring day, I had just wanted to come home to a silent, quiet apartment to relax in. Upset at the noise and smell, I asked her why she thought she had the random right to come into our apartment whenever she felt like it and use whatever she wanted.

She didn't reply but looked extremely offended, and that really irked me. I asked her to get out of the house, and she did muttering things under her breath at me in Hindi (a language I don't understand).

That night John came home and asked me why I had been so mean to his sister and kicked her out of the house. I said I was sick and tired of them coming over, and from now they were not allowed in the house without letting us know beforehand.

John said I was a massive a%&hole to his family and disrespecting what they provide for us and his duty to provide for them. We haven't talked since, and he slept on the couch last night. I don't think I was in the wrong, but John is really upset, so AITA?

The internet is ready for the culture war.

Anguscablejnr says:

NAH (No A%#hole Here). This is a family culture issue. You need to talk to him and discuss what you both want together. You make a new plan, learn to live with it, or break up.

WestAfricanWanderer says:

NTA (Not The A%#hole), but break up with him. This issue won’t be resolved, and you have fundamentally different views on family boundaries. Better to walk away and find someone who isn’t so enmeshed with their family.

WaywardMarauder says:

NTA, but it sounds like John has a different sense of familial obligation than you and I doubt he is going to change his mind. You may just not be compatible as a couple.

As a South Asian myself the only thing I think you did wrong was rename your Indian boyfriend to John. What is this a call center?