Woman refuses to pay for friend's bachelorette party a year after the wedding; AITA?
Friends of the bride and bridesmaids often help pay for the bachelorette party, but sometimes the financial expectations can get out of control....
So, when a frustrated woman decided to vent to the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As^hole' about refusing to fund a former bride's 'late bachelorette,' people were ready for the wedding gossip.
AITA (Am I the As%hole) for refusing to pay for my best friend's bachelorette weekend that is happening a year after her wedding?
So my best friend got married in July last year 2022. We have been friends for 15 years and had talked about being involved with each others weddings growing up all that kind of stuff.
Well she got engaged and married extremely fast to her current husband. Within a year of dating and I say fast because in May 2022 she was thinking of breaking up with him.
Then got engaged a month later and the wedding a month after that. The wedding was so fast that I wasn’t even invited to it and it was a small thing for hers and his family only. Which was a bit hurtful being my closest friend and all but that was fine and their choice.
So now we are here a year later. My friend and I haven’t talked much since last year because we have both been moving on with our lives. Now one of her other friends is trying to plan a “late bachelorette weekend” for her with only 3 of us.
Me, married friend and the girl planning it. Originally was supposed to be 4 going and the plan was to split the cost between the 4 of us for a hotel and things like that.
Now her friend that is planning everything asked me if I would pay half with her so that my married friend didn’t have to pay for any of it as a gift to her. And I straight up said no because it isn’t actually a bachelorette event but instead, to me, just a random girls night.
Back when my best friend was getting married I offered to plan a Bachelorette party to which she told me “no I just don’t think there is enough time until the wedding”.
So I thought I gave it a fair shot. AITA for not wanting to pay for my married friend's share even though it’s a late bachelorette for her?
Here's what the jury of internet strangers had to say about this mess:
Western_Process_2101 said:
NTA!! It’s a bit rude to try for a do over a year later and expect you to pay for it!
JsCTmav said:
NTA, you're exactly right - this is a random girls' night, plain and simple. Maybe suggest she covers your expenses? After all, this is just as much your bachelorette party as anyone's.
LadyNiko said:
NTA. You explained why you shouldn't pay and you are correct.
minime_13 said:
NTA. you offered her one year ago she said no, now another friend of her planning this so its not your job to pay, if somebody has to pay for her its gonna be the friend who is planning not you.
FifteenEggs said:
Even if it was a true bachelorette party, you can't just ask someone to pay like that. NTA.
Dense-Store8986 said:
NTA. If she wanted the bachelorette party experience she should have made time for it, or done it close and soon after. Not sure why the rush, sounds to me like it was just impulsive.
To not invite people and then expect a bachelorette party a YEAR later is a little rich to me. If she wants the experience, she can foot the entire bill as far as I’m concerned.
mustng66 said:
NTA - The audacity of the request is mind blowing.