Woman tells a stranger at the gym to 'name 3 women who loved him.' AITA?
: "AITA for telling a man to 'name three women who loved him?'"
So I, (19F) have started to go to the gym a couple of times a week. I just moved to a new town, so haven’t gone to this gym before. For some background, I am a really big metal fan. I’ve been a metalhead since I was 13, and I regularly wear band tees. The gym is no exception.
I’ve been seeing post about men who question women about their band tees, asking them to "name tree songs" and similar things, assuming all women wearing band merchandise are posers.
One response I’ve been seeing on social media to men asking these questions are ”name tree women who’ve told you they love you." I find this to be pretty funny, but I’d never think I’d have to use it.
So back to the story; I wore a mötorhead shirt and some tights when I was warming up on the treadmill. I see this buff tatted up looking dude starting to eye me. Now I do understand why someone would think I was wearing band merch for fashion purposes only. I have blonde hair, and except for two nose piercings, I’m very ”normal“ looking.
After he had stared at me for a while, I decided to take my headphones of, in case he was going to ask when I was done with the treadmill. Instead, he told me my shirt was cool, and I said thanks.
He then followed it with ”do you even listen to mötorhead? Can you name three songs or albums they have released?“ I’m always up to talk to someone about music, but not when they assume I’m a poser because of my gender.
As the title said, I asked him, ”can you name three women who have told you they love you?“ He got all pissy and quiet and went back to his workout. But I’m wondering if it many was to harsh? I could have easily proven to him that I actually listen to mötorhead instead of being rude. So I’m asking, AITA?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Potatoe_Farmer24 said
NTA - I love that, but my go to is name 3 women who trust you. LOL.
itzmark28 said:
NTA. He started it by assuming you were a poser just because you’re a woman. You just flipped the script on him. If he can’t handle the heat, he shouldn’t dish it out. Plus, it’s 2023, gatekeeping music is cringe.
NTA. This negging BS needs to be shut down fast. I disagree with comments saying you should have named three songs as that's indulging his rudeness. There's no need to prove your right to wear the t-shirt.
Murky-Magician9475 said:
NTA. He f'ed around and found out. You don't go up to tease a complete stranger without expecting them to be able throw it back. He was trying to shoot his shot by putting you down, you just had better aim.
MargotEsquandolas said:
NTA. A real metalhead would've just said nice shirt or chatted about the band. Lol at him for challenging you, then immediately turning his tail in shame when you stood up for yourself. F creepy dbags, you can wear what you want even if you didn't like the band.
changelingcd said:
NTA. Don't worry about gatekeeping questions from strangers. If he'd at least said "Hey, I love Motorhead. Do you have a favorite album?" or something polite, you could chat. "Name three songs" just entitles him to "Oh, f off" or similar retort. Your answer was great.
maximumpanic said
NTA. Another woman metalhead here. Anyone who would say that is immediately on 3 strikes and you can say whatever you want to 'em, free swing!