'AITA for telling my BF to cook after he invited six extra people to our dinner party?'
"AITA for telling my BF to cook after he invited six extra people to our dinner party?"
My (23F) boyfriend (25M) and I were supposed to host a dinner tomorrow for us and another couple we met on vacation. I’m supposed to be in charge of the cooking.
Two days ago, before going to work, my boyfriend told me he had forgotten to say to me he invited our neighbors and their three children. I was pretty annoyed he didn’t ask me first, but whatever, I said okay, next time, ask me if I’m okay with it first.
After coming home from work the same day, he tells me that he invited two of his colleagues and that they’ll come with their wives and kids. They have one kid each, so that’ll make two more children.
I got upset for two reasons he invited six more people without asking me first, again, and he told me that I needed to make a different dish for his colleagues’ kids because they won’t like what I was planning to cook.
I told my boyfriend he needed to cook because I didn’t want to anymore. He asks me why, as I initially agreed to cook. I said I initially decided to cook for four people, not fifteen. I added that it’ll be easier for him to cook for fifteen people anyways because he has his whole afternoon free while I’d be working until 4 PM.
My boyfriend disagrees and thinks it’s unfair of me to have decided to cook to take it back last minute. I said I’d be okay to help with the kids’ food once I returned from work, but he needed to do the rest.
He doesn’t want to and even threatened to cancel the whole thing if I wasn’t cooking. Am I the AH there? Should I be the one cooking still as I was supposed to cook from the beginning? Or is it only fair that he cooks for the additional eleven people he invited?
Here are the top comments from the post:
South_Blackberry4953 says:
'He doesn’t want to and even threatened to cancel the whole thing if I wasn’t cooking.' Sounds like a plan to me. NTA (Not the A%#hole).
TZH85 says:
'Threatening' to cancel? Girl, at this point he should either cancel, cook himself order food for everyone. He invited more people AFTER you told him not to do that anymore without checking in with you first.
That was deliberate. He wanted to show you who’s in control and now he’s trying to make you think you’re the one being difficult. If I were you, I wouldn’t come home after work. I’d go out to eat somewhere by myself or with friends and spend a nice evening while I reevaluate my relationship. Clearly NTA.
JeepersCreepers74 says:
NTA. He's not considering the work involved cooking for all these extra people, so let him learn.
How do you feel about this? Is OP right to refuse to cook, or should she do it because she agreed to do it already?