Son tries to save soon-to-be homeless 'boomer' parents after brother's death.
"Boomer Parents Didn't Prepare for Retirement - Told Me Too Late."
vrdeity
My boomer parents ran out of money 5 years ago and didn't tell me they were on the verge of homelessness until the VERY LAST MINUTE. My Dad finally swallowed his pride and told me they needed help.
Completely blindsided me and my partner. When I asked them why they didn't fund a 401k or save more, he literally turned to me and said "We didn't think we'd live this long." I have no siblings.
My Dad's a proud guy and he had a very difficult time adjusting to the New Reality that someone else was paying half his bills and he had to STFU about a few things. They are Boomers and have Boomer health problems, so the first thing I did was tell them to sell their house, pay off the 2nd mortgage and put whatever is left away in savings.
That was a HUGE fight but their social security income was eaten by the payment, so it was no bueno. They lived in rural Louisiana 1000 miles away from me and I just couldn't take care of them remotely.
They also had the Boomer McMansion that was 4000 sq feet of wasted space on a golf course, but they only occupied the kitchen and a sitting room where the TV was located. Way too much house for two people.
They wanted me to just start paying the mortgage and I almost swallowed my tongue. This was the first time I set a red line with my parents, either get on board with a new budget or I will not be assisting with more bad decisions.
I bought them a small cottage near where I live and moved them closer so I can keep an eye on them. My Mom doesn't like the new neighborhood, I suspect it is because in the larger metropolitan area we live, the diversity is greater.
One day I just had to say "Mom, you have brown neighbors, get over it." No further word was said, They are not in a high crime area and their neighbors are friendly, so she will just have to evolve.
At this point, I'm working two jobs. Thankfully their house appreciated and the interest rate is low, so I'm an accidental land lord who will make money when they don't need it anymore.
I have my own family and kid to take care of, so the surprised addition of Boomer teenagers really hurt my finances. I'm able to keep fully funding my 401k and even save a little because I will be damned if my kid will be in this situation.
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
I_h8_mods
Silver tsunami is going to take out the boomer's finances and the generations after. If only a certain demographic hadn't voted directly and indirectly to gut social programs, destroy unions and outsource most well-paying blue collar jobs, then we and they would have crazy things like pensions. Regardless good job on being a generous and caring human OP.
cheerful_cynic
To be fair, unions just had a pretty darn good year, my hope continues to spring for the moment.
I_h8_mods
Agreed, it was a good year for unions, and I hope there are a lot more to come. I hope this is the start of a trend of more unions and more worker owned businesses.
SeriousPenguinIssues
Dang. That’s definitely putting a lot of burden onto you ~ wow.
formerNPC
Voting against your best interest is apparently the “patriotic” thing to do because we’re so afraid that the wrong people might benefit from it. People don’t realize that they may need these services down the road but their ignorance prevails.
ranchojasper
My jaw literally dropped at that part. A 4,000 sq ft McMansion for just two people in their 70s?!?! Alllll these years throwing away the last of their money to pay the mortgage on a house that's so much bigger than they need!
And just expected his adult kid with a family of his own to just pay the mortgage on this stupid enormous house?! The entitlement is incomprehensible.
The OP then provided some responses for readers asking for more information.
vrdeity
1: Yes, I bought them a small house nearby. I'd rather feel the pain of paying a second mortgage than move those people into my home. When they don't need it anymore (die, whatever), I'll sell it and make a little money.
2: I work in a high demand field and we lived below our means. In addition to my main job, I take on consulting gigs that help me to keep up. My kid is about to graduate high school, so he will need a car and help with expenses after. Things are going to get tighter.
3: They are in their early 70's.
4: Wow, you guys have a lot of good questions. Selling their old house was the only way to get rid of the debts. I considered renting for them, but would still have to work extra to pay a lease. My thinking was this: if I have to pay for their living expenses, I might as well buy something with value and cash out later.
5: I am their oldest son. My little brother is deceased, he died in a motorcycle accident when he was 24. I attribute some of their dumb financial decisions to "grief spending".
6: Why don't they get a job? Boomer healthcare issues. My mom just had gastric bypass and then back surgery, so she is in no shape to work. My dad could work, but the new "online application process" kicked his butt.
Poor guy showed up to home depot with a resume and they turned him around on his heels. He's got health issues too, so part time only for him. I'd have to hold their hands to just get through the door.