'AITA for selling my house to my son without telling my daughter?'

"AITA for selling my house to my son without telling my daughter?"

u/New_Film1178 writes:

My husband and I (f48) had good jobs so we got the opportunity to save and buy a house when we got married. Then, as my husband loved to fish, we saved money again to buy a house in a lake near our city. We have two kids Theo (m29) and Lindsey (f26). We used to have family vacations in the lake house quite often as it wasn't that far.

The house was under my husband's name. My husband got sick five years ago with a terrible illness, he fought all he could but he ended up passing away a year after his diagnosis. As a way to be precautions he passed the properties to me and also the money he had saved up (we had separate savings accounts).

He never told me what to do with the money or anything, he just passed all out to me with the help of a lawyer. He also wrote a will for some of his beloved items (his grandfather's car as example) things that weren't expensive but had a emotional value. He left some stuff for me, some for our kids and the rest of his family and friends.

After his parting we started a yearly tradition to go there in his birthday to remember him.

Around like 8-9 months ago my son came up to me and asked me what plans did I had for the house, he explained that he wanted to buy a house before his marriage and would love to buy the lake house. I told him I needed to think about it, but then I agreed.

My son reminds me of my husband a lot, he loves nature as much as his dad did and he loves that house too, so I knew that it would be in great hands. We did it all legally and the house was sold market price range. My son and his fiance plan to move soon.

My daughter came home to visit me the other day, she asked me if we were going to the lake house to celebrate my husband's birthday again this year. I told her that we should ask Theo but I'm sure that's not going to be a problem for him. She asked why should we ask him and I told that since it's his house now he gets to decide that kind of stuff.

She went crazy when she found out Theo had brought the house. She had the nerve to tell that she feels robbed by me because that's her house too and I didn't asked her. I had to remind her that legally that house is mine, and that I had sell it to her brother, not just some stranger. We ended up having a big argument over this.

She said I broke her dad's promise because he told them both that the house would always be theirs to go on vacations, it would never sell or something like that. I didn't knew that as he never told me so, he didn't gave me any instructions about the house.

At last I told her to get over it and she left. She also blocked my number and I can't call her.

I think she's overreacting, the house is her brother's home now, it's not like we lost it forever to some stranger. My son and his fiance will sign a prenup too, so in case of a divorce he won't lose the house. But also I understand that she feels heartbroken over that promise that I had no idea of.

What do you think? Is Mom playing favorites, or does her daughter need to 'get over it'?

Reddit came together in a rare moment of internet harmony to say: YTA (you're the a-hole).

idontcare8587 says:

YTA. It was in your name, but it was a family house. Your daughter has just as many fond memories there as your son. Why would you not have mentioned it to her after your son said something? I always find it telling when someone keeps something quiet like this; you most likely already knew this was a bad idea.

TheatreKid1020 agrees:

100% they knew she would not be happy about it and try to fight the sale. My brother couldn’t wait to tell me he was buying his first home and it’s not a family home but I was kept in the loop through the process. Very fishy that neither mentioned before it was a done deal. YTA.

Hoplite68 speculates:

Her knee jerk reaction shows who the clear favourite is. It's as simple as that. A house that has been used by the whole family for years is then sold to the son on the down low, when it comes to light basically arguing back 'well its mine and I can do what I want' shows where their favour lays.

memfree comments:

YTA. Why wouldn't you tell her before you sold to her sibling? Why would you say 'the nerve' when she's shocked to be left out? What went wrong in your relationship? It sounds like you really hate your daughter, but we don't know why.

doobieduder writes:

You either think so little of your daughter that it didn't even occur to you to talk to her about it, or you didn't tell her because you knew she wouldn't be ok with it. Either way, that's just cold.