Who needs enemies when you have critical and cruel family members?
In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a woman asked if she was wrong for calling out her mom on "faking" her weight loss in response to body shaming comments. She wrote:
Tonight I was in my bathroom doing my normal night routine with the door open. I was wearing some sweatpants and a sports bra as my PJs when my mom walked my, poked my stomach, and said “Wow you need to get back into the gym.” My weight has always been something I was uncomfortable with and last year I was doing good in the gym, but these past few months have really been hard on me.
My mom was overweight so she started using these weight loss shots, which whatever I didn’t mind if it helped her be healthier, but the thing is she would always rub it in my face. Because I was doing my weight loss naturally, it was going by way slower for me, but because she was using artificial methods she was dropping weight super fast.
She would always ask me how much I've lost and then exclaim how much she’s lost, despite not working for it at all, no lifestyle changes or anything. This was always super upsetting for me since I was trying really hard to lose the weight but it never seemed good enough because she always lost more. What she said tonight was super hurtful to me because she knows how much I hate my body.
I looked at her and just said how rude that was and asked her to leave. She said it wasn’t rude if she was simply concerned about my health. (Side note, I am not morbidly obese or anything, I am around 140 at 5”5, so overweight, but nothing super life threatening or anything) To me, her comment did not seem to have anything to do with my health, but everything with my appearance.
Honestly hearing her say that made me want to cry, maybe I'm being sensitive but it seemed so rude. I called her out on her fake weight loss and said she had nothing to be proud of since she put in no work to make herself “healthier.” She started yelling and it caused a huge fight, so tell me, am I the AH?
teambrendawalsh wrote:
Being 140 lbs and 5’5” isn’t overweight. Your mom sounds like she has an unhealthy relationship with her body and has passed it onto you. I’m sorry. That sucks.
Charlie_Parkers_Mood wrote:
NTA, but your mother sounds abusive and I wonder if weight is the only thing she uses to belittle you. For some reason, your mother thinks she's in competition with you and because she perceives herself as winning, she feels free to lord her "wins" over you. The fact she made unnecessary physical contact with you was meant to degrade you further.
I don't know if this is new behavior from her because you're both trying to lose weight, or if she's always found ways to attack your self-esteem, but this isn't what a good parent does, and you should feel free to tell her that next time she decides to put you done to make herself feel better.
clairy115 wrote:
NTA - comments like that are unnecessary and could cause eating disorders.
FYI. - you are at a healthy weight for your height.
Additional-Bison-298 wrote:
NTA. Also less weight doesn't necessarily mean "healthier". Using weight loss shots is not helping her be healthier - it's helping her drop weight that will come back the second she stops using them. She sounds like she has a terrible relationship with health and food, and I am worried she has influenced your self-image.
Drezhar wrote:
NTA. Yeah, those parents always baffle me with that logic: "oh, my poor kid, devastated by bullies...besides, you're so fat". Or the ones that when you force on them the awareness that they just insulted you, they just go "but I'm doing this for you, to encourage you!".
To the parents out there one thing: your offspring will probably understand that you're psychiatric (if you are) way before they're forced to help you in your elder years, so keep this in mind.
Clearly, there's no universe in which OP is TA in this situation.