Mom gets upset at husband for copy-pasting Google template for Mother's Day card.

Ideally, Mother's Day is a sweet time where partners and kids can show just how much they appreciate mom and all the work she does.

But as with all emotionally loaded holidays, there are plenty of opportunities for things to go south. Particularly, if there's longstanding tension in the relationship that hasn't been addressed.

In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a man asked if he was wrong for using to help him write a Mother's Day card for his wife.

He wrote:

AITA - wife doesn’t like having the day off or my card?

So here is my question to the Reddit world. Am I the a**hole here? My wife told me yesterday: “All I want for Mother’s Day is to have the day completely off. I don’t need or want anything else.” I confirmed with her multiple times, and then started planning a day for my two boys and I. Today comes by.

I intercept my oldest son at 7am before he comes into our room. We go downstairs to watch his favorite morning show and to eat breakfast.

The moment I heard my youngest wake up, I got him out of his crib and downstairs.

We finish breakfast, and I have them start working on handmade cards for my wife.

When I hear her get up, we surprise her with the cards from the kids.

Here is where things go wrong.

My wife asks me: “Did you write me anything?” I told her I was working on it, but wasn’t done, I had been busy with the kids and wanted to finish it up. She was not happy.

I quickly finish it up, and sent it to her.

A note on this, I’m not a very well-spoken person, I have a hard time putting my thoughts together, so I used Google to turn my thoughts into a letter. She knows I struggle in this area. I come inside, and she tells me that I “plagiarized” and used Google for her letter. I told her I absolutely did, but that the main points were mine.

I then sent her the “original” and she scoffed and said “that’s it?”

So Reddit:

Am I the a**hole for using google to make myself sound elegant?

Am I the a**hole for not writing “enough” in my original?

Final thought - She told me “all she wanted was a day off.” She is still getting that, and is currently out with all her girlfriends.

Quick Edit - had an awesome day with my boys, wife was nowhere to be found for most of it, and I have to say, it’s the best day we (my boys and I) have had in awhile.

Edit #2 - I just saw a post on Facebook about how she’s had an awesome day with the boys. She’s still out with her girlfriends getting her nails/hair done.

Edit #3 (final) - Kids are in bed, wife just got home and asked me if I still planned on working out tonight. I straight up told her I was exhausted and going to bed. She’s now not talking to me. I’m so done with her attitude and the drama she brings to the table.

This post immediately inspired comments and hot takes.

DizzyTangerine9391 wrote:

NTA. Didn't realize she was marking a paper you'd submitted. Maybe next year it's a bunch of flowers.

tits_on_bread wrote:

I’m going to go against the grain and say ESH. Your wife shouldn’t expect you to read her mind that she wants a card when she explicitly said something else, and you were giving that to her.

On the other hand, Mother’s Day cards are kind of a given… and you didn’t write anything until the DAY OF? You should have had the foresight to realize you’d be busy with the kids on that day and made some effort to put something together beforehand. This is pretty basic planning.

No-Pin-9048 wrote:

YTA. Why didn't you write the card the day before so it was ready to go? And googling what to write sounds lazy. She just wanted you to put in the effort to give her a heartfelt card on time. She doesn't sound ungrateful - she sounds fed up and not appreciated enough for you to make sufficient effort.

reinadelacempasuchil wrote:

YTA. It’s not about you using Google to make your letter. It’s about the fact that you didn’t ask her or plan to celebrate her in any way until yesterday. Maybe she really wanted an item, or a brunch with her family or almost anything else but you asking yesterday means she knows you haven’t even started thinking about what she might like.

She is aware that last-minute shopping or planning is unlikely to be successful and to ask it of you would put you under a lot of stress. So she went with something low-key, likely partly because she didn’t have much choice, and even that you bungled. You couldn’t have used Google to write her a nice card literally any time before today? Mother’s Day is not a surprise.

You had to know it was coming, there are ads literally everywhere. You come off as thoughtless and rushed and while it’s nice you got the kids to make her cards and ensured that she got what she asked for in terms of having a day off, you dropped the ball on pre-planning and consideration. If it were me, I wouldn’t feel very appreciated either.

NJtoOx wrote:

Wait wait wait, you waited until the actual day of to start on her gift? And it was just a card? And then had Google actually write it for you?? And you only asked her the day before Mother’s Day what she wanted? Yeah, absolutely YTA. She’s disappointed and rightfully so.

endearinglysarcastic wrote:

ESH. She told you she wanted a card and the day off. She is currently getting the day off, and spending time with her friends. If she wanted more, she needed to tell you that. However, doing this the day before/of? Absolutely not okay. Mother's Day is the same day every year, and you could have done just a little bit of planning.

You could have asked her earlier, the cards could have been made (and written) the weekend prior, and you could have made a plan that consisted of more than ‘intercept children and make cards’. You may have meant well, but she wanted two things from you: one, she apparently had to organize and celebrate herself, and two, was an unfinished afterthought.

Yep, she’s got every right to be irritated. Next Mother’s Day, step up. You now know she likes a card and a day off. Make the cards with the kids the weekend before, find a poem you can quote for your card (poetry is romantic and shows you thought it out - Google is not) and either organize to take the kids out, or for her to go out (maybe for something like a pedicure - but dear lord, don’t make her organize it).

You had all the pieces this year, so next time, all you need to do is put them together, better and earlier.

While the internet is pretty split on this one, at this point it leans a lot more towards YTA. It seems that no matter the ruling, OP and his wife are overdue for a date night or a long talk.