Husband secretly commits wife to pyramid scheme so he can spend time with his mom. AITA?
"AITA for canceling a MLM membership my MIL signed me up for without my consent?"
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My (30F) mother-in-law (65F) signed me up for her Multi-Level Marketing company without my consent today. My MIL hasn’t been talking to my husband (31M) for a couple of months now, due to a disagreement related to horror movies and religion.
After that, she stopped talking to him. My brother-in-law (38M) was forced to choose between my husband or his mom when there were birthday celebrations or dinners. Often, he would choose my MIL because he wants his kids to spend as much time with her as possible.
That left my husband and I out of family gatherings. This weekend is his birthday and he wanted to go out to eat with the rest of the family, so he decided to reach out to his mom to clear the air.
He invited her to a birthday lunch with my brother-in-law’s family as well. She said she’ll go under one condition - he has to attend a seminar and sign up as her down line for her Multi-level Marketing company.
Wanting to keep the peace he agreed under the agreement that I will not be involved. I didn’t want any part in the Multi-Level Marketing company. My MIL reassured me that it’s no problem that I don’t want to join, as long as my husband joins.
Today was the seminar. My husband went to the Multi-Level Marketing office with my MIL. She also gave him a birthday present. 80 bottles of juices from the MLM company. He got sad, not because he wanted any birthday present, but because it seemed like she was just trying to get rid them and disguised it as a birthday present.
Because of that, he just decided to cancel the birthday lunch the next day. He still planned to sign up for the Multi-Level Marketing scheme, just to keep his mom happy. She gave him cash, around 100k, and told him to sign up a distributor. Then, she gave him more cash and told him to add me as his down line. He resisted but she persisted and, eventually, he signed me up.
I received a welcome email from the company. I was upset because they still signed me up even though we agreed not to. I took the matter into my own hands. I called the hotline to cancel my membership.
They said they will process it and call me back. They called my MIL while she was still with my husband. She got embarrassed and got mad at my husband. My husband messaged me telling me to stop the cancelation but I stood my ground and proceeded.
When my husband got home and found out I continued with the cancelation, he called his mom to give her a heads up because, if she still wants to reach her quota by next Friday, she will have to find a replacement for me.
She said that because of this, we will just have to live our lives without seeing her again. If there are family gatherings, she will refuse to go if we are there. This again made my husband sad because for the first time this December, his dad will be home for the holidays. His dad works abroad and is rarely home for the holidays. So this would’ve been the first time in a long time that we’re complete as family. AITA?
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
owls_and_cardinals
NTA. "She said that because of this, we will just have to live our lives without seeing her again." This is 100% the answer.
I'm sad for you and your husband, who held out hope for a reconciliation but his mother seems KRAZY, not to mention unstable, unreliable, unethical, and uncaring. You should absolutely say you accept that decision and don't wish to have any relationship with her either, end of story.
The OP responded here:
AdAccomplished2066
I agree. It’s just too bad that the rest of the family will choose her over inviting us to anything because they want their kids to spend time with their grandma. She signed up the rest of the family too btw and they were just passive about it. I was the only one that disagreed.
Thisisthenextone
Your marriage will not survive your husband lacking a spine. Be ready for what your next steps are when he picks his family over staying together. HE signed you up for the MLM. She didn't.
20LettersInAlphabet
Make your husband cancel too. MLMs exist ONLY to leech money from people, your MIL is going to lose a lot of money and also cause you and your family to lose a lot of money. It's sad, but if she's going to put this MLM over her son, she clearly doesn't truly love him to begin with.
Jessicapie_
NTA Your MIL signing you up for an MLM without your consent is a massive overstep. You're an adult and she has no business making financial decisions for you. Your husband should've had your back from the get-go. The fact that she's willing to sever family ties over an MLM is a whole other level of messed up. Keep your ground, you did nothing wrong.