'Our neighbors have been having pool parties at our pool while we are not home for years.' + UPDATE
"Our neighbors have been having pool parties at our pool while we are not home for years."
Robyn_withaY
A few years ago my husband and I purchased a house with a pool. Now we are acquainted with most of our neighbors but definitely not close friends with any of them. They all seem nice but well just don't have much in common other where we live.
Next door to the right is a family of six, twin daughters attending the local university, high school age son and a young elementary school age daughter maybe first or second grade and the parents.
Now normally we open the pool in early May and leave it keep it open until the end of October. But this year our weather was off and we had a very cool and very wet month of May and then June went straight to 100+ temperatures.
I am currently on a medication that makes it difficult for me to tolerate being in the sun and heat for an extended time. Plus we have been helping two extended family members who are having health issues. So because of this we haven't had our pool opened yet this year.
Normally we go to the family lake house for a week during each of the three major holidays, but we didn't go for Memorial Day because there was flooding around the lake this year, and because a family member was just discharged from the hospital yesterday and July 4th being a Thursday this year we decided to stay home this week and be available to help this family member.
Now several times in June the little girl next door has seen either my husband or myself outside and she has asked when we are opening the pool. We first told her maybe later, but the last time (yesterday) she asked and I said we are probably just not going to open it this year, and she started crying. Now we have never had any of the neighbors over to use our pool so I didn't understand why she was crying over us not opening our pool.
Well I spoke with the neighbor on the left later and apparently our neighbors on the right have been having a small family party at our pool every 4th of July when we are gone. They have always cleaned up really well afterwards and because we have scheduled pool maintenance and weekly yard service occasionally things are moved around in our yard and we never thought much about it.
The neighbor on the left thought we had given the other neighbors permission to use our pool. We did give them permission to retrieve any balls or toys that ended up in our yard, but never permission to use our pool especially when we are not at home. We have a special latch on the gate and my husband did show the neighbor how to open the gate to retrieve his kids toys.
So now my husband, who loves gadgets, is going to have several more cameras installed around the exterior of our house, covering the gate and pool area. And have the gate latch made where we can grant remote access for the pool service and yardmen. Luckily we have a friend who does cameras and home automation systems.
I'm annoyed our neighbors have been using our pool without permission, but my husband is happy I am letting him get more gadgets around the house. Now do we confront the neighbors and let them know we know they have been using our pool, or just wait and see if they say anything about our new security cameras?
Here were the top rated comments from readers after the OP's initial post:
CaliPirate
Lawyer here, though not yours. You need to put up "no trespassing" signs, tell your neighbors they are not allowed on your property without explicit permission and change the lock to the gate.
Now that you know, you are on notice and could be held liable if they are injured visiting your pool. Sucks, but it will be much less trouble than a lawsuit.
carmium
OP should have a rolling pool cover, and it would simple to cover the pool when they're going to be away and use a couple of decent eyebolts and padlocks on the unattached end.
neophenx
I don't know what would be more fun.... to tell them up front to not use the pool, or to not say anything and next time you find them on camera using your pool, just calling the police for trespassers on your property to surprise them.
stjoe56
I had this problem. When I left town I put up a warning sign that stated the pool was being chemically treated and it was dangerous. Of course I did no such thing. All I did was put up a sign. One day I got a call from an ER because someone snuck into the pool and claimed they injured by the chemicals. I told the doc they were faking it as the only thing I put up was the sign.
Trick_Parsley_3077
I would also suggest you place “No Trespassing“ Signage on your gate and around the fence. Then watch your cameras. This way you can call authorities when you see them enter your property on camera. maybe even a “Smile you are on Camera”.
And if the neighbor asks if they can come on your property to use your pool because their daughter really looks forward to it! You can hit them back with “Oh NO” we Do Not want to be liable for Any Injuries that may occur! Tell them they can certainly get their own pool if it is that important for their family.
I use to have a pool and the upkeep and chemicals are Not Cheap! The Entitlement of some people…Wow!
Roughly a week later, the OP returned with an update.
"UPDATE Our neighbors have been having pool parties at our pool while we are not home for years."
Robyn_withaY
I didn't expect this to blow up like it has, certainly didn't expect over a thousand comments. I have tried to read them all, and some were very creative and amusing to read. First of all, we don’t want to hurt anyone or alienate our neighbors. We just don't want people using our pool without permission and we don't want the liability associated with this activity.
A few things I feel I need to clarify. Yes, our backyard is fully fenced in with two gates. One in back is double locked from the inside, the side gate on the side of garage nearest the neighbors in question has a double latch that you have to reach over the top and find not one but two releases to open the gate.
There is also an auto-close that automatically closes the gate and latches it. I personally can't open the gate from the outside of the fence because I can't reach over that far to reach the two latches.
The previous owner put this in and it has worked well for our yard crew and the pool maintenance people. We do have some cameras, a doorbell camera and a camera over our garage area.
The garage camera picks-up if someone goes towards the gate from the front, but we didn't want to invade our neighbors privacy by recording their side garage door and gate to their backyard.
We even shared the camera angle with them because we didn't want them to be concerned about us recording their children or their coming and going. I guess we were more concerned about their privacy than they were about ours.
Anyway the update, Thursday, July 4th morning, I was loading a few things in my vehicle to take to my cousin who just got out of the hospital. Neighbor/husband, who has been gone a lot for work recently, saw me and came over and asked if I was getting a late start going to the lake.
I let him know that we were staying home because we are helping my cousin who just got out of the hospital. He asked if we were going to be home all weekend, I said yes one or both of us be around all weekend. He quickly wished me a happy 4th and went home. I went back in to grab my purse and tell my husband about the conversation with the neighbor before I left.
When I got home our friend, Mike was there. Mike does security cameras and home automation systems (gadgets) and my husband loves gadgets. Mike and my husband have a plan for multiple cameras and several gadgets.
Some of which involve us going ahead and having the pool opened. I agreed to all but one of the new cameras and almost all of the gadgets, I think husband put some in the plan knowing he would have to give up a few of them. Mike also suggested talking to our homeowners insurance agent because we might be able to get some discounts with the security upgrades.
So on Friday the 5th, Tom, our insurance guy comes over and Mike is back and he has a drone to help him find the best camera positions. Really I think he just wanted show off his gadget.
So husband, Mike and Tom are outside and all around the house and occasionally inside. I look outside every so often and at different times other neighbors have come outside and down to our end of the street.
So neighbors want to know what is going on, so husband tells them we are concerned that someone or several people may have used our pool without our permission while we were not home.
It turns out that two different neighbors had witnessed some friends of the neighbor children come over last year and they and the neighbor twins had gone into our backyard. One neighbor even asked the girls and they claimed that we let them come over all the time and use our pool.
So at this point husband and Tom discuss this and Tom says we should send a registered letter to the neighbors rescinding our permission from entering our fenced-in backyard.
So before Mike and Tom left, the neighbors on the right (pool party neighbors) come home, both husband and wife. My husband asks to talk to them, and with Mike and Tom as witnesses he tells them that for insurance reasons we are rescinding our permission for them or any member of their family or guests, to enter our fenced-in backyard.
And we will be sending a registered letter stating this as requested by our insurance. Husband never accused them or their children of using our pool but said we had reason to believe that in the past our pool had been used without our permission. He did say that we had reason to believe that their older children might be friends with someone who has been in our pool.
Husband also told them that we are changing the gate to have an automated lock and cameras will be installed around the pool area. He also assured them that we avoid the cameras pointed at their windows or backyard.
Husband indicated that we were taking these measures to hopefully lower our homeowners insurance rates. Husband said that they exchanged a few looks between them but they said they understood and appreciated the heads-up. So hopefully this saga is over, but if there are any other updates I will try and post them.
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's second post:
CinnamonDish
Thanks for the update! Sounds like you’ve done everything right. Did the pool party neighbors even act embarrassed for themselves or did they play it off?
DotObjective2153
The petty in me would not have been this mature!
Hopefully that's the end to it all.
AcrolloPeed
This is about as friendly, direct, and air-tight as I’ve ever seen.
writingisfreedom
I needed this....
You don't think much happened but:
"Neighbor/husband, who has been gone a lot for work recently, saw me and came over and asked if I was getting a late start going to the lake. I let him know that we were staying home because we are helping my cousin who just got out of the hospital. He asked if we were going to be home all weekend, I said yes one or both of us be around all weekend. He quickly wished me a happy 4th and went home."
Made me laugh hard....
Suckers
NTA