When this woman isn't sure if she messed up or not, she asks Reddit:
I 27F have been dating Ben (32M) for two years now, Ben has a 12 year old daughter Sam. I met Sam about a year ago and it didn't go very well at the beginning. Sam not wanting someone to replace her mom (I am not trying to do that) and a whole problem of she still wants her parents to get back together.
Ben and her ex got divorced three years ago (50/50 custody). I am the first serious relationship with Ben which makes it harder for Sam. Sam and Ben do therapy and it got better, I sometimes join for it but that is rare and it is by Sam or Ben invite. Anyways it is better now, but Sam has a habit of its it something I enjoy she likes to take it.
An example is I love the color green Sam does not but will go and grab my favorite color and there are none left. Or if I say I can't wait to eat that leftover she will go and eat it. It is small petty stuff and really doesn't affect me in the long run but it can be annoying.
So last month I went to make a sandwich and the only thing left was the butt of the sandwich pieces, I was being sarcastic when I said I loved the end pieces, well Sam heard that and from that point on she would go out of her way to eat the end pieces.
It took me a while to get what she was doing and every time she would do it she would be miserable. She really hates the end pieces. I thought she would stop on her own since she didn't like it.
Well today is when it blew up, I made some French toast and basically used half the loaf of bread. It was all well until Sam asked why I didn't use the end pieces. I told her that I don't like eating them at all, she got shocked and started to freak out.
She went on that I tricked her and Ben took her side saying I shouldn't have tricked his kid, stop trying to parent her, that I am a jerk and to get out. I am shocked this was such a big deal and told my friend who thinks it is funny and that those two need to get over themselves. AITA?
wordsmythy writes:
NTA. She's a brat and he enables her bratty behavior. He told you to get out over this??? Run away. I mean this was kinda funny, he should've seen that. He's not ready for a relationship.
briareus08 agrees:
NTA, it’s not on you at all. This doesn’t feel right to me - they may be going to therapy, but it seems like all that’s taught Sam is that she needs to be sneaky about sabotaging your relationship - and Ben is happy to actively support her. Time to go I think.