New Mom berates sister when she's accused of raising a 'crunchy vegan baby.' AITA?
When this new mom is annoyed with her younger sister's thoughts on her parenting, she asks Reddit:
"AITA For accidentally letting my sisters friends I have a "crunchy vegan baby"?"
AITA For accidentally letting my sisters friends think I have a "crunchy vegan baby"? To preface: I do NOT have a crunchy vegan baby and I think this is mostly a misunderstanding.
My daughter is six months old and breastfed. I am vegan, my husband isn't, and our toddler is vegetarian/vegan-ish (he doesn't like animal dairy but will ravish eggs). We don't cook meat in the home, although my husband eats it out of the home, and our toddler isn't a fan.
Before anyone jumps on my ass he has been introduced to it because his dad eats it. He just prefers fries. (Same, kid).
Anyway, I took my daughter to my parents house about a week ago. My mom is also vegan so we were eating our tofu and rice. My daughter has just started solids so she was also going ham on my plate. My parents dog ate more than I did.
My younger sister (15) had her friends over. They were having burgers or something and watching me with my daughter. After I ate I nursed her and one asked if I was vegan. I said yes, she got this weird kinda look, and asked if my baby was going to be vegan.
I just kinda shrugged because, you know, she could be a dairy hating fry fiend like her brother or a cheese-aholic like her daddy. Maybe, maybe not. My sisters friend nodded and spoke to me a little more before leaving.
I thought it was a little odd but shrugged it off. Teens are weird creatures sometimes.
Anyway, unbeknownst to me, this teen had decided I was a crazy vegan "crunchy" mom. Theres a few tiktokers who are apparently stupid about their kids safety and happen to be breastfeeding vegans. Like yours truly.
I thought all was well - my sister sent me a link on the importance of a balanced diet for kids among a few other bits and eventually I called her. I was like, what the hell? And she started going on about how I was a bad mom.
I told her to watch her mouth and she blew up and said I was the one with a "crunchy vegan baby".
So, turns out, her friends are all convinced my children are terribly abused by my veganism, and because she'd never seen my toddler eat meat it was clearly true. I told her to calm the F down, explained my parenting, yada yada.
She them got mad because all her friends think I'm a terrible mom and I should have been clearer and not just shrugged her friends question off because I should have known what they would have assumed I meant.
I think she's being dramatic. They were worried, wires got crossed, all is well. She's still acting like its the worst thing in the world.
So, basically, aita for making a mistake and having my sisters friends think I've got a crunchy vegan baby?
As a side note, my husband was feeling petty so he went and got ribs for lunch. Filmed little lady eating her first rib. I can now firmly say she will not be a vegan, vegetarian or anything of the sort. Happier than a kid on Christmas. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
spicyturtle38 writes:
NTA. Generally the opinions of 15 year olds shouldn’t be trusted and it’s unfortunate that your sister hasn’t learned that yet.
She’s probably afraid to lose the social currency of being a righteous educator amongst her friends- she had a purpose to brag about and now she doesn’t. This is entirely about the teen social hierarchy and not about you at all. She’ll get over it when the next life-shattering drama happens.
waltysworld writes:
NTA. Your sister and her friends have only themselves to blame for their drama. In fact, I think you're the best kind of vegan and mom. You've chosen your food lifestyle, and it works for you.
Your husband has chosen what works for him, and you're both happy with your menus. You are introducing vegan and vegetarian options to your kids (which is awesome) but not forcing it on them.
I feel like a lot of us are put off by vegan and vegetarian choices because we're not used to them. We're accustomed to the taste of milk, egg, and meat products because that's what we've always had, and the vegan/veggie versions just taste different.
Your kids will have an advantage, in my opinion, since they will be somewhat accustomed to it all. When they end up at a friend's wedding reception with only vegan options on the menu, they're gonna chow down, even if they're not vegan.
And if they need to watch their diet or eat healthier or whatever someday, they're going to be familiar with a lot of healthier alternatives that many of us might not even consider.
usualequivalent writes:
Are you seriously worried about this? Some random teens thinking your kid is abused because they’re not eating meat?
How many teeth does your kid have? About 2? 3? My kid is almost 9 and the meat he eats consists of pepperoni, hot dogs, fast food burgers exclusively (nothing homemade or it’s a chore), and most recently chicken nuggets and kielbasa.
How about telling your sister that your choices as a mother are not her teenage friends business? How about telling her that her friends don’t know shit about raising babies?
You’re an adult with children, worry about something worthwhile or the wrinkles later in life.