'AITA for banning my husband's kids from the family home they grew up in?'
"AITA for banning my husband's kids from the family home they grew up in?"
I was told post here, I am 17 years younger than my husband who is 72 and his kids are in their 30s. We don’t like each other, I find his kids to lack basic respect for people. They grew up spoiled and are just rough to deal with. My husband has a good amount of money, he had his own company and he sold it.
Now when the kids visit it’s always about the will. It’s disgusting, they don’t visit since it’s their dad it’s so they can figure out how the money is split. He had surgery and the kids didn’t visit him in the hospital. One showed up when he was high off pain pills to figure out the will. I kicked him out.
I sent them a message that they are banned from the home until he is back to normal. I’ll talk with my husband when he is less out of it about if he wants to keep the ban. Because I know he is sick of it also. They are angry that I banned them from the family home and called me some creative names. AITA?
Let's see what internet users had to say:
Is the will actually unfair? And how long have you and your husband been together? If he’s screwing his kids and it’s say all going to you then I kinda get why they’re concerned but also they should know him better than that (presuming he isn’t) and either way nothing can change until he’s compos mentis, which he isn’t.
Tbh the fact that this is all they’re thinking about is reason to write them out (or reduce what they get in) the will.
Agreeable-Nebula-543 OP responded:
Together for 10 married for 6. The will everyone gets 25%.
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NTA but think your husband should have the final say in this. I can't imagine how it would feel to have my kid not bother to visit me after surgery but show up asking what kind of money they'll get after I die instead.
Agreeable-Nebula-543 OP responded:
That’s what I plan to do when he’s off pain meds. He should be good by Thursday.
ESH. Were the kids actually spoiled growing up or did dad use money as a substitute for parenting, thereby creating this dynamic? Without context about the will comments, it's hard to issues a judgement, but in a general way, a step parent banning adult kids from seeing their sick parent doesn't sit well with me.
Horrible spoiled, my husband admitted this, he wanted to give them the world and he did. They didn’t visit them in the hospital but come over to discuss the will when he is high on pain pills. Just no
iamirene writes:
Given his current health and their incessant desire to discuss his will (while he isn't healthy which is particularly abhorrent), NTA. You are looking out for his best interest and not letting his kids pick at him like vultures. They should be ashamed. It's even worse that they aren't.
meanestgoose writes:
ESH. If your hubby is really sick of how his kids are acting, HE can ban them. He certainly could have before his surgery. I would have been more sympathetic to your situation except you waited to ban the kids until he wasn't in a position to argue. As the kids today say, that's pretty sus.
lastdayyesterdaytoday writes:
YTA. You have no idea what they grew up with. Of course they are concerned that you show up. They had to deal with him their whole lives.