Teenage girl FLIPS out on DAD when he JUDGES her for using PADS. AITA? UPDATED.
When this teen girl sets a boundary with her dad, she asks Reddit:
'AITAH for telling my dad he doesn’t get to talk about my period?'
I (16f) have made it really awkward to be around my dad (46m) and have probably ruined my relationship with him. I know I’m kind of young to be on Reddit but I need help. I’m currently on my period and only use pads because tampons make me uncomfortable.
In January my family got a dog. I’m not really a fan of dogs but I tolerate her. When I replace a pad, I wrap it up in toilet paper or wrap it in the wrapper of the new pad and seal it closed with the little tape still on the wrapper.
This has never been a problem until we got a dog. She likes going into the bathroom and taking my used pads out of the trash and ripping them apart.
For the last couple months, I’ve had to chase her around the house and clean up ripped apart pads, but it’s never really bothered the rest of my family as long as I’m the one cleaning them up.
Today, the dog got to a pad I had thrown away earlier this morning. I caught her and threw the pad back in the trash and closed the bathroom door so she couldn’t get to the trash again.
While I was in my bedroom, my dad confronted me about it. He told me that the dog kept getting my pads out of the trash and that it was a problem. I was confused and asked him what he wanted me to do about it since the only way to dispose of a pad is to throw it away.
He told me that he wanted me to “grow up and start using tampons.” I was horrified. I told him that I wasn’t comfortable with tampons and that he didn’t get to talk to me about my period.
He asked why not. I was speechless and had no idea what to say and just started crying from the embarrassment and shock and shut my bedroom door.
My mom (47f) is currently in Florida visiting family but she was my last resort. I’ll copy and paste the exact message I sent her. “Tell Dad to stay in his own lane and leave me alone because he just told me I “had to grow up and start using tampons” so that the dog would stop eating my pads.
He doesn’t get to say that to me, it’s not fair. I can’t help that my uterus sheds every month and I go through almost unbearable pain and his only remark is that I have to grow up and use something I’m not comfortable with.”
I know it sounds a bit bratty, but I was crying my eyes out and had no idea what to say. She’s furious with him.
She texted back saying it was inappropriate that he said that to me and that it was a total AH move on his part and it wouldn’t happen again. I have no idea what she texted him but I haven’t seen or talked to him since. I think he’s probably mad at me for bringing my mom into this and I don’t know how to confront him. AITAH?
Let's see what internet users thought about this one.
plasticvenus writes:
NTA. I’m a woman in my 40’s and I still use pads - if I ‘grow up’ any more I’ll be legit dead. My sons girlfriend put a pad in the trash and I got up one morning and the dog had gotten it out.
You know what I did? Threw it out before she noticed and got a goddamned trash bin with a lid for that bathroom. You know what I didn’t do? Blame a young person because I didn’t think ahead and do that in the first place.
tangerinebouquet writes:
This is the answer. Not only are you NTA, and your father a huge AH, but his 'solution' wouldn't solve anything.
In fact, a dog can simply eat tampons--which can result in an obstruction and pricey vet bills for surgery (or just really embarrassing moments at the dog park getting the passed tampon all the way out).
The solutions are: get a trash bin with a lid that snaps closed, close the bathroom door, and train the dog. Sorry your dad's an AH.
witchred6 writes:
NTA - You do need a trash bin with a lid and your dad must not be aware that tampons are also put in the trash bin, they should not be flushed as they can cause issues with the plumbing. The dog needs to be trained to not go through the trash because they can get into something really dangerous.
Then, OP offers these FASCINATING updates.
UPDATE: Thank you all so much for advice and being so understanding in the comments. I’ve scrolled through quite a bit and a lot of people are asking how using tampons would fix the situation and why using tampons is a sign of me “growing up.”
Both my mom and twin sister use tampons and flush them. I’m the only one in the house that currently uses pads as my 8 year old sister obviously doesn’t have a period yet. He thinks that flushing tampons down the toilet is normal and that I just need to grow up and start using tampons like my twin.
UPDATE 2: Thank you all so much for even MORE supportive comments and suggestions and I told my mom that I caved and posted on Reddit and that everyone suggested getting a trash bin with a lid and she agreed.
When she returns from Florida tomorrow, we’ll get a bin with a lid. The only reason my dad isn’t buying the trash bin today and solving the problem quicker is because my mom doesn’t want him to get an ugly one lmao.