Woman blacklists neighbor after she deprives autistic daughter of halloween candy. AITA?
When this woman speaks negatively about a certain house in the neighborhood, she asks Reddit:
"AITA for telling parents not to take their kids trick or treating to a certain house?"
My husband and I have 5 kids between us. He had 2 from a previous relationship (9 and 13), I have 1 (14) and we have two together (3 and 6). Our 6 year old is autistic. She is verbal but she doesn’t like strangers and doesn’t talk to them.
I was worried about taking her trick or treating but I know she practiced at school and we practiced the signs “candy please” and “thank you”. It was going well at first, then she started to get tired.
At one of our last houses, she didn’t speak or sign. The woman was handing out goodie bags with king size candy bars and stickers. She gave one to all of my kids except for my 6 year old.
She ran to me crying and my 14 year old told me that the woman didn’t give her a bag because she wouldn’t say trick or treat. I went up and explained that she’s autistic and doesn’t speak much but the woman refused to give her anything unless she said trick or treat.
After some back and forth, I made the kids give the bags back and we left. I texted a group chat with parents in my daughters classes, both general ed and special ed, gave them the address, and explained what happened so they wouldn’t have to deal with that with their kids.
Word spread pretty quickly so that house was not very popular last night except for some pranks. People even posted about her on nextdoor. Now she’s posting about me and my kids and this whole thing is blown out of proportion. I was wondering if I was wrong for telling parents not to take their kids to her house. AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
helptheold writes:
NTA you didn’t tell anybody to stay away from the house, you just gave a heads up of how someone treated a neurodivergent kid. People made their own decisions on whether or not to go to the house but I’m glad to see so many were supporting neurodivergent kids.
We gave out full-size candy bars last night and there were kids who were so excited they forgot to say trick-or-treat or thank you. Did I complain or make a fuss? No! I saw a couple of kids grabbing extras and it didn’t bother me.
It’s Halloween and it’s supposed to be fun. It’s wonderful when kids are polite but you also have to recognize that there are kids like your daughter and my son who sometimes can’t do that or who are just too excited by everything going on to remember all the social niceties.
acorngirl writes:
NTA. I'm so sorry your daughter was treated that way. The woman was way out of line. I don't condone pranks but I can't bring myself to feel any sympathy for her. We hand out candy to anyone who comes to the door.
I don't make the kids say anything; I compliment their costumes and wish them a "Happy Halloween." And I don't care how old the children are or how haphazard the costumes. Sometimes teenagers get nostalgic and decide last minute that they want to go out. It's supposed to be fun and exciting for everyone.
prudentborder5060 writes:
Nta. You didn't mention targeting this woman. You said what happened to your daughter. What makes this nta not E S H for me is she didn't even apologize. She made an assumption that led to this behavior from others.
She failed to apologize. She probably took it as rudeness, not because your daughter is autistic. Honestly, she got what she had coming. When you mess up, you apologize. I feel for your daughter.