Man wonders if he's wrong to minimize fiancé's severe 'llama spit' phobia.
When this man is annoyed with his fiance, he asks Reddit:
'AITA for not taking my fiance's 'llama drama' seriously?'
We made plans to go to this event that a mutual friend was putting on, and were excited.
Until she found out there would be some sort of mobile petting zoo there. Complete with llamas.
Upon hearing this, she flat-out refused to go. She just said 'no, I'm not going anywhere near llamas.'
I thought this was very bizarre behavior, she's not scared of animals or anything.
After more prodding, she revealed almost tearfully that a llama spat on her once when she was 14.
I said....well, ok, did you wipe it off or what happened? She got a little upset and said I was being insensitive and that it's so much worse than I could imagine, it's the sickest she's ever felt, she'd rather get the flu than to ever have to smell that again, etc.
I said 'well you don't even need to go near the llamas there, can't you just do other stuff?' She said no because even the sight of them might make her remember the feeling and smell, plus if anyone else upsets one and gets spit on she's worried she'd still smell it if they came around her later in the party.
Well, this was still bizarre to me. Llama spit isn't some sort of apocalyptic nightmare, as far as I know, you wash it away and move on. I did some research and it looks like it can stink if they're really mad, but all the same...she's never been particularly squeamish.
I asked if it was some sort of llama-specific phobia, but she reiterated no, it's not about a fear of llamas, it's just that the spit really is that bad and I was being ignorant for acting like her concerns were 'invalid' and that if anyone else at the party knew how bad it could be that none of them would ever dare to get near a llama.
I was upset that she made us change plans last-minute and she's upset that I'm not taking her llama-spit fears seriously. AITA?
Let's find out.
grabok808 writes:
YTA you’re being insensitive to her and if it was the other way around you’d definitely be upset. Something minor to you might be something bigger to another.
gloryholkinetic writes:
NTA...Kinda. It's okay for her not to go, regardless of the reason. BUT, she should also understand that its ok for you to go without her. IF you do, don't share her concerns just say she had a prior engagement.
archersarrows writes:
YTA. An ex of mine was a germaphobe. He still drove me on a cross-country trip to an alpaca farm, which was a lot of camping and general discomfort for him, and pretty much as soon as we got there a Llama spit directly into his mouth.
I was 21 and laughed, like an asshole, but then immediately apologized, got him a bottle of water to rinse his mouth and dug his toothbrush out so he could brush. It was gross; beyond that, being spit on is pretty humiliating for anybody, regardless of circumstance. Dude, come on.