Woman's SIL says, 'you're mom's dead.' Woman finds out she was lying, gets revenge.
When this woman feels like her SIL tricked her into thinking her mom was dead, she asks Reddit:
'AITA My sister in law told me that my mother had died when she hadn't and I refuse to forgive her?'
I work on a site which requires no chance of spark electricity due to the nature of the business so all phones are locked away.
About eight weeks ago, I got to my phone while preparing to go home and saw that, in the time since dinner, I had received thirteen calls and voicemails and a lot of WhatsApp messages asking me to contact my brothers.
After ringing the missed calls and trying to get an idea of what was wrong, I got hold of my sister in law who told me that my mother had a routine operation and was dead. I was totally in shock. I tried contacting my brothers who were at the hospital but reception there was very poor.
When I finally got to the hospital (almost two hours later due to distance and traffic) I finally found my mother and brothers in ICU which I thought was strange. They were behind curtains and I noticed that my mother had oxygen being pumped into her and asked my brother about it and was told it was a comfort thing.
Next thing that happened was my mother slowly moving her hands. I nearly jumped out of my skin thinking that my mother was a zombie coming back to life.
After being calmed, I was told that her vital signs began dropping at the end of the operation and the decision was made to withdraw life support because my brothers did not want her to suffer any more pain.
I spent the next day in the hospital watching her slowly die while seething about being told a massive lie.
At the funeral, my sister-in-law walked up and said she wanted a hug because I was sad. I politely told her that I wasn't in the mood. On my way out of the wake, I shook everyone's hand except hers and it upset her. So am I the asshole?
Readers were baffled by this post. Some people took OP's side. Others thought she was being ridiculous.
kingcoco writes:
YTA. I'm sorry this is ridiculous. OP's brothers were not answering their phones and SIL thought her mother was dead.
You are calling SIL an asshole because you think she could have responded better to a very stressful situation she has likely never faced before, despite the fact she acted in good faith and tried her best to help.
Someone's not an asshole because they fail to be perfect and OP should be thanking her for helping out the way she did.
I bet if SIL had told OP her mother was in the ICU when she was actually dead, OP would have been angry SIL lied to her. OP is using SIL as a punching bag for her grief.
particulartry writes:
NTA. This was not your SIL’s news to share, and she didn’t even relay it properly. She should have simply said “Your mum is in the hospital, and in ICU, please come” IF your brother didn’t want to talk to you to explain more. “I’m sorry, I don’t know much more, please come” is the line for her part in the play.
Now she thinks she can hug you and everything will be better. Multi generational family feuds have been started for less. She should apologise “I”m sorry, I screwed up. I wasn’t thinking straight. Please forgive me when you are able” is what you deserve to hear.
richdimension8 writes:
NTA, but is it possible your sister didn’t lie but just got information mixed up?? It seems like a stressful situation with not a lot of communication, perhaps she thought your mom had passed but wasn’t yet? Or do you know for sure it was on purpose?