'My BF of 2 years abruptly dumped me over text because of my 'fake' Facebook account.' UPDATED

"My [26F] Boyfriend [26M] of Three Years Abruptly Dumped Me Via Text Because of Someone Else's Facebook."

A few minutes ago my boyfriend of 3 years dumped me via text. It really shocked me and his reasoning was that he found a Facebook profile that was apparently mine (it's not) and that I was a lying b-word who plays games and that we were done. This completely came out of left field. Last we spoke which was not even two hours ago everything seemed fine.

I'm a few hours away atm because I was visiting my family. I've been helping my Dad because a car accident that has left him disabled. It's been really hard for him so I decided to spend a weekend with him. My boyfriend had to stay behind because of work.

My phone was on vibrate and I woke up to it vibrating some where in my room. He called twice in a row which is a little unusual so I tried to call him. A part of me was worried something bad happened because he never just calls seconds a part. He forwarded my call to VM after one ring and then I got a string of enraged texts.

First was a picture of a profile of some woman who shares my name and the rest were filled with anger. How I "played him for a fool" and that he was done playing games. Firstly the woman in the pic looks nothing like me, she has black hair and blue eyes. I have auburn hair and green eyes. I also have a beauty mark above my lip on the left hand side and this woman has nothing.

My boyfriend blocked my number, Facebook, and all that lovely stuff and I am at a loss. This is all very sudden and all I feel is anger and pain. I don't want my Dad to hear me crying. He has enough on his plate to deal with. A little background, my boyfriend cheated on me a few months into the relationship and I didn't learn about it until a year later. I ended up forgiving him and things seemed fine.

He was remorseful and did his damndest to regain my trust. I can't help but wonder if he did this because he did something wrong and wants an excuse for it or he wanted to dump me in order for him to cheat without "cheating". Tomorrow is his birthday too. I wonder if he wants to be free for that day. It just makes me cry.

I wont be taking him back. No way in hell. He's living in my house nothing is in his name he can F off. Right now I'm kind of shattered at the moment because I invested so much time and emotion in this person.

I forgave him when he cheated on me and now he's pulling random facebook profiles out of his @$$ to use to break up with me and say I'm the shady one. What can I do to help myself? I am really at a loss right now. Thank you

TL;DR - Boyfriend of 3 years dumps me via text accusing me of having another Facebook despite the fact the woman in the profile looks nothing like me and the only thing we have in common is our name. How do I move on and heal from such a callous action?

Commenters weighed in to offer advice:

Vivisexy said:

You head home as soon as possible to deal with this.

You have a friend meet you there and you tell your boyfriend that he needs to move out. You might have to give him the formal 30 days, but let him know it is over and he needs to leave.

Hawkknight88 said:

- Cheated on you

- Dumped you over text, he's 26 years old

- Dumped you because someone on facebook had the same name as you.

Wowza. What a winner.

rvXty11Tztl5vNSI7INb said:

He's projecting. Better off without him.

Subsourian said:

He's living in your house and had cheated on you then made an impulse decision based off of some flimsey evidence. Either he's remarkably stupid or there's something deeper here. Either way, take some time to cool off. Have a friend with you if you do decide you've had enough and kick him out. You own the house, you have the control here.

OP responded:

I think he is both stupid through immaturity and I think he did something and his only bizarre rational way of selfishly dealing with it is behaving the way he did. I talked with my friends and family and we are going to be having a little party when I get home tomorrow. He can return to his Mom's basement for all I care lol.

msmedic2U said:

It definitely sounds like he was just using that as a excuse to break up with you. Since everything is in your name and he's living in your house, tell him to have his stuff out by the time you get back and move on. You don't want to be in a relationship with someone who will look for excuses to break up with you, even for a day. I can't say whether he's cheating on you or not, but I wouldn't discount it.

OP responded:

Hindsight 20/20 I should have seen the red flags. He was very paranoid of other males even my own cousins. He even got upset that my GP was an elderly man. smh. He said he was just scared I would cheat on him to get back but if you love someone you don't treat them like that.

It was really odd because he seemed totally happy and began to relax not a week before I visited my Dad. Suddenly that ragefest and text dumping. Whatever. Thank God I never got pregnant with that douche nozzle or married.

Mundokiir said:

People who randomly freak out like this are invariably the ones trying to hide something. I wouldn't be surprised if he was cheating again (or still). Kick his ass to the curb.

OP responded:

I agree. He would act paranoid which is 99% of the time a massive red flag but would claim it was because he was afraid I would revenge cheat on him. Ugh I'm really kicking myself right now.

The next day, she shared this update:

Thank you guys for your encouraging words and wisdom it's helped out a lot! Myself and six other people went to my house this morning including my brothers and lawyer uncle. My ex was sitting in his computer room playing LOL seemingly oblivious that I came home and anyone entered the room. I promptly tapped him on the shoulder and asked him to turn off the game and pack his stuff.

He shrugged my hand off and continued to talk to his team mates through what I assume was Skype or teamspeak. My patience for his BS is in the negative so I bent down and unplugged the surge protector from the wall. My ex flung the headset that I bought him off of his head and it bounced off his monitor.

He stood up screaming how that was a ranked game and that I was screwing up his stats or whatever he was foaming about. My brother stepped between us and told him that he had ten minutes to pack his things and only his things before we called the cops to have him removed.

We all stepped out of the room and watched him unplug his computer and neatly stack his stuff. He tried to take my ethernet cable and I was like, nuh uh. A friend brought in a box and we watched him go through the house taking the seldom things he owned all the while texting away on his phone. It turns out he was saying some ugly things on his FB but whatever.

That is childish stuff and water off a ducks @$$ to me. He tossed the box of clothes, sneakers, and DVD's/console games into the backseat of his sh!tty 1995 Honda and then made it a process to take his computer out.

He was more concerned his LOL game and his computer than me. He didn't make eye contact or speak to me. There was just an air of hostility that I can't even explain.

I can't comprehend how someone could just suddenly hold such animosity towards someone they apparently loved. I sat on the stairs watching him go back and forth, my friend Jess recording the whole process on her cell phone just in case. (she's pretty clever lol).

It was really hard, I felt anger brewing under the indifferent exterior I was showing. A part of me wanted to throw an egg at the back of his smug head but I know that it isn't worth it. He isn't worth any energy negative or positive. The whole process took about fifteen minutes and we all watched on my lawn as he drove away. My uncle gave a big hug and left and the rest of us ate pizza and watched some TV.

As uneventful as it was, the whole experience was draining. It's easy when there are people around to talk to and occupy my mind but when I'm alone what he did keeps popping into my head and I start to get anxious. I tossed all of my bedding and sprayed my couches and chairs with deodorizer in the lame attempt of exercising whatever foul things he may have done. I know irrational lol.

Today I'm going to be heading to Bed Bath and Beyond to buy some new bedding and treat myself. I realized that being with him I didn't really love myself I was too preoccupied with appeasing him. Any action I took in spoiling myself whether it be new clothes, a game, or make up was met with suspicion. It was all in his whacked out head.

Being alone after being in a relationship for such a long period of time is daunting I know I'll be fine if not awesome after getting that cancer out of my life. I had to set up a rule with my friends and family to not talk about him to me because a friend texted how he was flooding his Facebook with pictures of himself smiling and being happy. I don't want to hear it.

If he's happy that he is a resident of his Mom's basement and cheats on good women with gutter scum then so be it. In the end, whether it be six months from now, a year, five years, whatever something in his brain will click and he will realize the massive screw up he did the last few days. As crappy as it sounds I hope it makes him miserable.

I will be changing my locks despite taking his copy of his keys and I think I will add extra security just in case. When he was a teen he vandalized houses of people he didn't like and judging from his behavior I wouldn't put it past him to do it again. Also I am going to the doctor tomorrow to get tests done. I don't feel anything wrong but I wont be taking chances.

This whole thing has been a life experience. He hasn't ruined any future relationships for me. He did me a favor to up my standards and reinforce my self worth. I know what to look out for now and I know what kind of person I deserve. Thank you again you guys! You brought a lot of great points and it helped tremendously!

TL;DR - Went home with an entourage consisting of big burly brothers and a lawyer. Ex had a temper tantrum that I interrupted his ranked LOL game to kick him out (priorities). Other than that it was peaceful. Going to splurge on nice things today and tomorrow I will be getting STI tests done. Thank you so much for words of encouragement and compassion <3