Man asks for advice after ex charges $3k on his credit card; refuses to pay him back.
"My ex-GF stole my emergency credit card and ran up a $3000 bill. She says I owe it to her to get her "back on her feet" after we broke up. She also said she's not paying it back."
My ex and I broke up late last year. She wanted to go out constantly and I did not, our lifestyles just weren't compatible. She lived at my house and I didn't make her pay anything as I make significantly more than her.
What really sucked was that if she really wanted to, she could have essentially squated in my house for months while I'd have had to file eviction papers. In the end, I paid for an apartment deposit and first month's rent on a place for her.
I hadn't spoken with her at all until a week ago when I got a collection notice in the mail. The credit card I literally don't use and only had for emergencies was maxed out and charged off. When I looked into it, I found it had been maxed out by March of this year. When I downloaded the statements, it's all fast food, Victoria's Secret and grocery stores. Also found the card was missing.
I texted her asking about it and she called me and said she did it because I left her with basically nothing and she needed back on her feet. She then said I was lucky she didn't sue me for emotional distress. I hung up because she literally has sued coworkers, twice, and got settlements both times.
I'm thinking of just going to the police and letting them deal with her. My credit score has dropped about 200 points in a year. Any other advice I might be missing?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Collect as much evidence as you can and go straight to the police.
She admitted to doing it, shouldn't be too hard to prove.
An attorney is going to be necessary here. Credit card fraud can be hard to prosecute. Edit: I am speaking from experience.
If you file a police report, it will drop off your credit report. And the odds of her getting in legal trouble are actually pretty slim in most areas in the US.
Later OP added this update:
Edit - I filed the police report (simple process) and I'm sending the information to the credit bureaus tonight. There were a lot of questions about her previous lawsuits, one was for harassment and the other for s%$^%l harassment.
They were both iffy cases but both businesses settled. I don't know if she's actually going to try suing me.
I probably should have been watching my credit better. This was the first time in probably a year and a half that I even checked my credit. Lesson learned here. I always ignored the emails along with the million others I get and the address on the account was my old one from like 4 years ago.
2 months later OP came back with this update:
I heard back from the investigator on my case on Friday. He did a remarkable job from what it sounds like, she confessed to him that she only used my credit card for "essentials" and then said she also used it at Victoria's Secret.
She was charged with felony credit card fraud and had to get a public defender. Since she's never been in legal trouble before, she's being offered 12 months probation. I also got an order of protection against her which she didn't contest. The final ruling is supposed to go through at the start of January but the investigator said it's basically a done deal.
I'm alright with how it turned out. Probation is probably a pretty big deal for her, I know something like that would absolutely get me fired from my job and drastically alter my life. The charge off was removed from my credit reports and my score is back above 760.
I actually watch my credit now and I'll be keeping an eye on the public record for her court case just to be safe. I appreciate everyone's advice/encouragement!
Here's what people had to say after the update:
Well, that'll be a f&%^ ton of jobs she'll never get. Who the hell would hire a felon that commits fraud? (GOP aside)
Committing a felony sure is a great way to get back at your ex especially a felony that can easily be traced back to you! Wish my ex had done that instead of fucking her way into my friend group
youd be shocked at how many people dont know that using someone elses credit card is fraud