'AITA for asking my GF to start making me breakfast every morning? I hate mornings.'

"AITA for asking my girlfriend to start making me breakfast every morning?"

I (27m) have been living with my girlfriend (29f) for several months now. For the most part things are really good and I plan to propose soon and hopefully have at least a couple of kids with her. However we've run up against a conflict.

She's an absolute morning person. I hate mornings. By the time I force myself out of bed in the morning and into the shower she's already been up for at least 30 minutes--even though she has to be at work later than I do--and is at the stove making breakfast. She likes a huge breakfast in the morning.

She usually has eggs, either French toast or pancakes, hashbrowns or breakfast potatoes, and sausage or bacon. Sometimes on weekends it's ham or steak. She eats almost nothing for lunch and usually has a smallish dinner but she loves a huge breakfast.

Meanwhile I only ever have cold cereal for breakfast, or MAYBE if I'm feeling really ambitious some instant oatmeal and orange juice. I only even start to come alive halfway through my second cup of coffee and definitely don't feel like cooking in the morning.

However my girlfriend obviously does. So recently I asked her if she'd start making breakfast for me, too. She asked if we were going to trade off and if I'd sometimes make breakfast for her, too. I told her 'no' but reminded her that I do often make dinner for her. She said that since we trade off making dinner we should trade off making breakfast, too.

I told her that there is no way I'll ever be able to muster that kind of energy first thing in the morning, but that since she obviously can that she should just make me breakfast too. I said that it would take next to no extra effort on her part to throw in a couple more eggs, strips of bacon, an extra portion of hashbrowns, etc since she's already doing it for herself, anyway.

But it started a fight, with her saying that it wasn't fair for me to expect her to think of me in the morning since I don't do the same for her. She seems to think that her making breakfast for me should figure into our division of labor and that I should do something extra in return.

But I think that since she makes a huge breakfast for herself every morning anyway that throwing an extra portion of whatever she's making on for me would take next-to no effort on her part, so why should I have to do more for her in return than I already do?

Here's what people had to say in the comments:

Highclassbadass writes:

YTA LMFAO. 'Oh so we'll take turns making breakfast for each other? :D' 'Oh.. no you'll just make food for me, it's no extra effort for you anyways.' The CHEEK on you.

EnvironmentalCoach64 writes:

Dude should have offered to make dinner every night in exchange for breakfast every morning from her.

Blonde-Engineer-3 writes:

YTA. These kinds of posts always make me sad with how transactional the relationship is and then they tell you the actual division of labor and I don’t feel bad anymore.

OP if you want her to put in extra effort to make you happy by making breakfast and make your life easier, where are you putting in extra effort just to make her happy and make her life easier? Don’t expect someone to give 110% and go out of their way to do extra stuff for you if you’re not gonna do the same.

topps_chrome writes:

I’m sorry, but what kind of asshole makes breakfast spreads like that for one when more than one person lives under the roof? It really isn’t much more work. I couldn’t imagine going through the hassle of making eggs and bacon and not making a plate for my gf.

AnaDion94 writes:

Oh I absolutely think it’s bizarre that she’s not doing that. I just think his entitlement about it and the way he asks is even worse.

Renee_17 writes:

I agree. When I’m making a breakfast like that it’s for the whole house 🤷🏽‍♀️. I don’t keep tallies but everyone is different. Agreeing to cook dinner every night should be a good comprise.

PetitPied21 writes:

I’m trying to understand because I didn’t get it. You want her to maker breakfast for two in the morning because you don’t have the strength to but it’s not supposed to count as a chore like the rest?

TimeandEntropy writes:

You’re talking about proposing and kids. Will she Never get a morning off from kids because you hate mornings? She’s already up so she should be the one to pack bags and lunches and cook Everyone breakfast? She’s breastfeeding so you never need to cover the night wake ups?

She’s home earlier “often” and that’s the person who starts dinner 1 and picks up the kids and deals with the homework but you’re totally doing 50/50. She’s washing her clothes anyway so it’s no extra effort to put yours in - then fold them and put them away cause she’s doing that for the rest of the load right?