Woman shares story of drunkenly confessing she's in love with lifelong best friend.

'Ok so I completely f**ked up here but here we go.'

Me(22F) and my boy best friend(25M). Our moms have been best friends since childhood so we have known each other pretty much our whole lives. We are pretty close and stuff like hugs, him carrying me etc. aren’t something new to see us doing.

Recently I have started feeling him more as a friend which I kinda find annoying… The reason I find it annoying is bc he is my friend and I don’t want to ruin that friendship. Not only my friend but one of my closest and best friends.

Back when we were teens he liked me for a while but after some time he made it clear he didn’t like me and he started dating others. We have never dated and at that time I was into another guy.

Saturday night he invited me out with friends at a bar and I accepted the offer. Headed to the bar and we drank a couple if drinks. The night was going pretty good. Then headed to the house of one of the other boys(29M).

There we smoked some weed and drank more alcohol. By an hour later we were all waisted and high. We were about 12 people. Near the end someone(i don’t remember who) offered to play spin the bottle or truth. We played both. This is all I remember when we were there.

When we had to go back home I was COMPLETELY waisted and didn’t know what was happening around me. My best friend was probably the most sober of us so he called a taxi and got me home. I live on the fourth floor with no elevator so he had to give me a piggyback ride.

All I remember is that I was blurting our random stuff and words that made absolutely no sense. I remember at one point I blurted out “I’m in love with you” or some shit like that. He stopped for a sec and then asked “what?”. My drunk self repeated what she said and we continued going up the stairs.

When I woke up in the morning I saw that he didn’t even spend the night over which is what he usually does when I’m alone and this out of earth. I went to the bathroom and while brushing my teeth all this came back to me… Needless to say I was HORRIFIED…

I’m not gonna be surprised if I have done even more awkward shit in the past. I didn’t call him or text him the whole day. He did message me that day however(Sunday)if I was ok and if everything is okay. I have told him that I’m okay and asked him how he is and what he’s up to. He has left me on seen…I’m not sure if I can ever look at him in the eyes.

He hasn’t contacted me in 4 days and I’m not sure he ever will… Mutual friends have been saying that when they offer to call me to hang out or something he always finds an excuse to leave and people are asking me why he is avoiding me as it’s becoming too obvious… I can say that I have royally fucked up…

The TL;DR:

I’m in love with one of my closest friends. Saturday night he invited me out to a bar to drink with friends. Ended up waisted at a friend’s house. He carried me to my apartment and My drunk self blurted out “I love you”. He hasn’t contacted me yet. It’s been 4 days…

Update:

Ok so I didn’t think I would make an update and it would be this soon but after 5 days of silence he finally messaged me this morning. The message said “Hey, are you free today?”. I was literally gonna fall of the bed as soon as I saw it.

I responded with “Yeah” “Why you asking?”. He said that we needed to talk and my HEART DROPPED. A second after that my phone started ringing. It was him… I was staring at my phone for about 6 seconds and then picked up. The conversation went quite normally which kinda scared me…

Around 3 hours later I role up to his place. At first it was awkward silence then we sat down and he apologized for leaving me on seen for 5 days and that he was just processing some stuff. He then asked if I remember something from Saturday night. I lied and said “No” and he repeated the whole night. Turns out that I don’t remember it exactly…

When he was helping me up my apartment there were 3 other people and one of his friends asked “what” not him… Turns out that this is now an ongoing joke in between those friends. I started crying and apologizing over and over again. He hugged me and asked if I really meant what I said or was it just some shit that I blurted out for no reason.

After I calmed down I realized that its now or never. And I told him everything, my feelings, what I remembered, how long etc. The whole time I was shaking and sobbing.

Well….to my biggest shock he said he knew…. He said that he had known for a while since I have been acting more clingy and strange than usual.

He also said that he never stopped loving me ever since he confessed when I was 16 and he just tried to forget me by dating other girls and doing shit like drugs and alcohol(he’s been sober since 2017) but he was never able to so he just stopped with all that and gave up and that’s also the reason he hasn’t been dating anyone since 2018.

We hugged each other and stayed like that for about 10 minutes-me crying him smiling. We ate, watched a movie and I spent the night at his place. Fist time we slept in the same bed since we were 10. Ig now I have a boyfriend…?

The TL;DR

He messaged me, I went to his place he told me how the night actually went and that there were 3 other people when I said that. I confessed and he confessed. Now I have a boyfriend who Ik won’t trash my apartment ;)