'AITA for leaving my friend stranded in Bali after realizing she had blown all my money?'
"AITA for leaving my friend stranded in Bali after realizing she had blown all my money?"
My (23F) best friend (24F) and I have been working the same job for the last 4 years while studying. We have been saving for a big 'girls trip' to Bali since we were 16, and we figured the only way we could pay for this was if we both get jobs and go halfs on the tickets, hotels and food.
We have known each other since primary school, and up until last week I have trusted her with everything. So when she opted to do the travel finances and figure out the costs, I willingly let her handle it so that I could focus on the rest of my study before I left on holiday.
To put it bluntly, i am much more well-off than my friend. I could have paid for the trip 7 years ago, but my friend insists on doing everything herself, and so i saved with her for all these years.
When I gave her my details for payments, I was shocked at the cost of a 2 week holiday in Bali, however I was less concerned for myself and more concerned for my friend.
We had estimated a price that was exactly half of what had come out of my bank account, however I brushed it off and decided that as long as she was comfortable spending that much herself, then I wasnt worried.
Our time in Bali was great. We had an incredible time and had so much fun together. However, the day before we were supposed to leave for our flight home, my friend realised she had booked the wrong flights and we were supposed to leave on the flight the day before.
Obviously I was bothered by this- even I know that $2000 is a lot of money to be throwing around. So, i asked her if she would be happy paying $1500 instead of $1000 for the flights, and she agreed.
That night, i used her phone to book the flight times but I hadn't made sure that she had enough money in her account. So, when I opened her account to check, i saw that she hadnt spent more than $50 since before she booked the flights.
There was no record of such a large amount of money coming out of her account, and so i immediately knew what had happened.
I confronted her and she threw a tantrum saying i was always throwing my money in her face and that i might as well 'godda&N use it on [her] instead of [myself] for once' so, in the heat of the moment and with a lot of build up anger and betrayal, i pretended that it was fine.
I transferred the majority of her money into my account, booked a one-person flight home and told her I had paid for us both. We arrived at the airport with packed bags, and of course she didnt have a ticket because I hadnt paid for hers.
I left by myself with her money, and sent her money back the day after. I have been getting calls from her family, friends and her boyfriend 24/7 attacking me for leaving her stranded in Bali. Am i the asshole?
Let's see what readers had to say.
feacockpeather writes:
YTA- as if you did this to someone you've been friends with since high school! leaving someone alone in a foreign country when you know they didnt have the funds to get home? Massive AH behaviour, hope your friend is ok!! If you didnt want to be friends after you could have just cut her out your life when you got back.
brovocateur writes:
NTA but IMO it is dangerous to leave a friend in a foreign land, especially if she is a woman. (Not being xenophobic, people everywhere prey on tourists.) I would have settled it when we got home.
associatecrafty writes:
You transferred your friends bank account to zero and left them in a foreign country? YTA people her are out of their minds. Sure she’s an AH too but if my “friend” stole MY ENTIRE BANK ACCOUNT with the INTENT TO STRAND ME IN A FOREIGN COUNTRY I would be suing absolutely, and you bet my lawyer would take it.
Also why would your friend be the only one who knew when the flight was? You’re just as responsible for missing your flight as she is.
Was she messing around with money? Yes, but it sounds like you agreed to pay those flights and she would pay you back. That’s an agreement. You committed wire fraud. Good luck with life I guess if this is how you handle things.