Woman pressured by SIL to use $200 in food stamps to split cost of Thanksgiving. AITA?
When this woman is offended by her SIL's financial request, she asks Reddit:
"AITA for being offended when asked to pay for thanksgiving when I’m not hosting?"
AITA for being offended I was asked to pay for thanksgiving this year? I do thanksgiving with my(f20) husbands(m24) family and we change who hosts every year.
This year my sister-in-law(f27) and her wife’s(f28) family offered to host thanksgiving. My husband and I agree that they are not the best cooks and they are demanding they do the cooking, they always underbake the casseroles and it’s too soupy, we offered to help with the cooking and they denied it.
Despite knowing I’ll have to politely pretend I like the food I was okay with going, until SIL calls my husband and asks when we are taking her shopping for thanksgiving so we can pay for the groceries, she wanted about $200 in my food stamps.
I’m on food stamps because I’m poor and SIL has a nice job and her wife’s family is very wealthy and well off, I told my husband to tell her no. We couldn’t even if I wanted to give it because I don’t have that much money, I’m pregnant and we have a child, the money runs out quick.
Then later MIL(f57) called us up and asked us to at least give the rest of our stamps towards the thanksgiving, I said no way, I will not give my last dollars towards a meal I’m barely going to eat because they’re bad cooks, and make myself go hungry. They definitely have the means to pay for it themselves.
MIL said I need to stop eating so much and spending the food stamps, fyi the stamps are in my name only. Then MIL proceeded to complain that I’m basically the reason that she has to give the 200 herself and that I’m putting her through a hard time by not contributing.
I am offended that they would act like they’re entitled to the food stamps. So I’m decided I won’t bring my child to their thanksgiving and I’m having my own with just my husband and our child, I used the last $40 on the food stamps that I had and was able to get a turkey and all the sides with coupons.
I don’t want to go to their thanksgiving this year but my husband does, should I just let bygones be bygones and bring my family to their thanksgiving and have our own with good food after? AITA?
Let's see what readers thought.
gonebabythoguths writes:
NTA. Hosting usually means they pay for the majority of the costs and ask people to bring things they like and/or a side dish, dessert or beverage. It does not mean they invite you and then ask you to pay for all of the food (irrespective of their cooking skills).It’s perfectly fine if you to pay for your own meal at your own house with your own money.
stacyb125 writes:
NTA. And honestly, when we started having a small thanksgiving dinner at home, it changed my life. It was so chill and wonderful and drama free that I couldn’t even believe how happy I was. Enjoy your meal. Hug your kid and have a wonderful day with your family.
eternalninja writes:
ESH. Your sil sucks for asking your food stamps to pay for the groceries. Your MIL also sucks for complaining. Your husband and you suck for bringing another child into the world while already being on food stamps with one child.