Woman wins lottery and wants to keep it a secret. Husband 'wants to share.' AITA?
When this woman is frustrated with her husband's financial decision, she asks Reddit:
'AITA For not wanting to split my jackpot win with my husbands friend?'
I (F30) played the lottery for the first time last year when everyone was talking about the Powerball jackpot. Since then I’ve played casually, only spending a few dollars a week. I occasionally won a few bucks and never really expected to win anything big but it was nice to dream as I had a ton of debt and have been struggling a lot.
Fast forward to a few months ago (won’t say the month for privacy) I checked the winning numbers one night against my ticket and it matched with my numbers perfectly.
Initially I didn’t believe it and thought there had to be a mistake so I told my husband(M35) and we checked it like a dozen times and I was right, we won. It’s Life changing, multi generational, F you money.
We instantly agreed to keep the news to ourselves and wait a few months before we did anything. The past few months have been an incredible high, filled with disbelief and though it’s been difficult, we have managed not to make any large purchases or change our lifestyle.
We fantasized about what to do with our money but the time to claim is drawing near so we have begun having more practical discussions about how to claim it and what to do with it.
While discussing, my husband “Adam” brought up that he thinks it’ll be a good idea to split the money with his best friend/ business partner “Tim”. Tim and Adam have been friends since they were in middle school and have done everything together ever since.
Together they’ve started businesses, work together, invested money, moved to the same town and have often dreamed about our families making it big together. Since we have take risks together and are so close...
Adam feels it’s fair to give them 1/3 of the cash prize so that 1) we are not going on this journey to a new life alone 2) it’s suspicious to make all this money suddenly and more easily explained if Tim “makes”money as well since we do everything together.
I however feel it’s risky to share that we have come into this money with them because Tim’s family tends to be more flashy and like showing off and I don’t fully trust that they will keep it quiet or modest enough to not raise suspicion.
This is important because I’ve seen community members harass and attack people with far less money just because they feel entitled. This could jeopardize our safety so I want to avoid it if at all possible.
Also I’m not really comfortable with his plan to add Tim and his wife as members of our LLC to claim the prize (because I think it could have them feel entitled to a bigger chunk or take the money?)
Adam thinks I’m being selfish and he wont enjoy our new found wealth if his friend isn’t living the same lifestyle but I think we could find a way to later give them some money after figuring out a way to explain how we came into money without telling them we won lottery (no idea how to do that yet).
Anyway, AITA for not wanting to tell them we won the lottery and split the money? Am I selfish?
Let's see what internet users had to say.
redsauthor writes:
Hire a financial advisor. Pay off your debts, keep a small sum for expenses, and invest everything else. Your husband wanting to share that money is strange. That's YOUR money and HIS friend. If I were you, I would put the money in a place my husband can't reach it. NTA.
fitalternative9 writes:
NTA do not give them any money. Honestly why would your husband suggest such a thing? Unless they are lovers I dont get it.
If I won the lottery I would take a friend or buy a nice house and they could live there too but I'm poor poor. I dont own anything and have zero money. They're not homeless or poor and need lifting up. It's your money.
roxywalker writes:
NTA and I can’t help but feel like fights over money are always at the heart of the problem. Never fails. Your spouse will insist on ‘sharing’ the wealth. You know it’s best not to because doing so can cause unwanted attention and potentially safety issues. His heart is in the right place but money changes perspective.
And lots of money corrupts people’s ability to make rational decisions. Others will feel entitled to get a slice simply by being related, being a coworker or just knowing you even casually. It’s not going to get any easier so you will need to make some very difficult decisions very soon.