Man charges friends for his 'restaurant quality' home cooked meals. Friends won't pay.
When this man feels taken advantage of by his friends, he asks Reddit:
'AITA for Charging My Friends for My Homemade Meals?'
I (29M) have always been passionate about cooking and experimenting with new recipes. Over time, my culinary skills have developed, and I have become quite adept at creating delicious and unique homemade meals. Many of my friends have tasted my creations and have expressed their love for my cooking.
Lately, my friends have been requesting that I cook for them on a regular basis, as they find my meals to be restaurant-quality and a delightful change from their usual routine. While I enjoy cooking for others and seeing them appreciate my food, it is quite time-consuming and requires a lot of effort on my part.
In light of this, I started charging my friends a small fee for the meals I prepare for them. I believe that my time, effort, and ingredients should be compensated for, just like any professional service. I am not trying to turn it into a full-fledged business, but charging a reasonable amount helps cover the costs and acknowledges the effort I put in.
However, some of my friends are now upset and accusing me of being greedy and taking advantage of our friendship. They argue that since I enjoy cooking, I should be happy to share my food without expecting any compensation.
They claim that charging them diminishes the spirit of friendship and turns our gatherings into business transactions.I am conflicted now, as I feel that my friends are being unfair in their expectations. So, Reddit, AITA for charging my friends for my homemade meals? AITA?
Let's see what internet users had to say.
spicengirl writes:
Oh my god they’re not narcissists. Can we please stop using that word for anyone who is being inconsiderate? It’s trivializing. They’re just plain ignorant, selfish, and greedy. Doesn’t help that OP is referring to it as a “fee” and referring to their friends finding it “delightful.”
Just be upfront.“Listen, I love cooking for you guys sometimes, but it’s a lot of work and costs a lot of money. There’s a reason restaurants charge, and why my food more closely resembles what you would find in a restaurant. I wouldn’t expect you to knit me things for free just because you like knitting.
I would want to compensate you and support you because I’m your friend. If you knitted me one thing once as a gift, I wouldn’t ask for monthly gifts for free afterwards. I don’t want to “charge” you for my cooking.. but it would be nice if, on evenings you expect me to cook you all a meal, you all pitched in for the cost.
I don’t think that’s being unreasonable, and I feel taken advantage of otherwise. If that doesn’t seem reasonable to you, maybe we just do potlucks from here on out, and I’ll bring whatever dish I feel like making, and not feel pressure for it to be fancy or expensive or labour intensive.”
thebaffledking writes:
NTA – Your friends are either bad people, irrational people, or normal people whose kneejerk reaction is subconsciously driven by the fact that they got overly comfortable with a beneficial arrangement that they don’t want to lose.
They are requesting that you cook regularly, and this has turned what was an enjoyable and affordable hobby into an unaffordable hobby that is beginning to become a chore. That is obviously not okay. Think of it this way: your hobby is cooking, and their hobby is eating; why should you be the only one who pays?
I remember when a friend of mine started getting into cooking as kind of a new hobby, and he wanted to use me as a guinea pig for his meals. We treated it as a mixture of me doing him a favour, and him doing me a favour, so I didn’t bring wine or do him other favours as often as I would if he was already a good chef.
You are well past the point where your friends are doing you a favour. They are simply taking advantage of you, although it’s possible they don’t realise it. If they can’t handle that, just stop cooking for them. If they don’t want to hang out with you because of it, they were using you anyways and you need better friends.