Guy snaps at vegan roomie after she sends documentaries over text. 'I'm not converting.'
Living with roommates can be a wild experience. One minute, someone is a complete stranger, and the next - you're arguing over fridge space, hearing their intimate life through the walls, and negotiating how loud the TV can be after 10pm. It's a lot to trudge through, and even with mature communication skills, there will simply be people you immediately vibe with more than others.
In a popular post on the AITA subreddit, a young man asked if he was wrong for telling his vegan roommate no one wants to hear about her documentaries. He wrote:
"AITA for telling my vegan roommate no one cares about her documentaries?"
I (18M) am living in shared accommodations with (18F) and 3 other people for college. We all have our own rooms but share the kitchen and living area. I will call my vegan roommate Sarah for the purpose of this post.
I'm totally fine with veganism and Sarah is nice enough. When we first moved in she asked if she could have the top fridge shelf and to keep it vegan, and to not use her cooking things without asking and to only use it to make things like vegetables to avoid cross-contamination. This isn't an issue and I respect her choices.
However, as the weeks have went on it seems like she is subtly trying to convert the flat, for example by sending everyone various documentaries on WhatsApp and suggesting we watch them whenever we do movie night, at first it was fine but at this point, it's honestly annoying and more than just me feels this way. Also, she is rather judgmental and will leave any room someone is eating meat in.
Well, last night I confronted her and essentially told her I'm not going to become a vegan, that I don't care about the documentaries, and that she's coming across as pushy. She got upset and I'm wondering if I was too harsh. AITA?
Edit: I was told to include that I did tell her I wasn't interested over text first when she initially sent the documentaries.
The internet quickly swooped in with opinions.
okIhaveANopinionHERE wrote:
NTA - The reason so many despise vegans isn't usually because they don't eat meat, it's because so many of them tend to be so damn preachy like your roommate. Ignoring it won't make the problem go away, so the way I see it is that you have two ways to shut this down:
1) keep telling her to knock it off and that no one cares, or 2) watch a documentary with her, specifically one in which they show animals being slaughtered, and make sure to say at the end: Wow, I really need a cheeseburger right now. Number 1 is the nice way, number 2 would make you an AH, but it can be a lot more fun.
LowBalance4404 wrote:
NTA and she is the poster child for why people avoid vegans.
Pineapple-Maniac wrote:
NTA - she comes off as lowkey passive-agressive. But I can't really judge you since the way you said it and the wording could make a huge difference.
Baboon_Stew wrote:
NTA. If you wanted to know more about being vegan, you would have asked. Her evangelizing is going over the top. Next time you see her, ask if she wants to watch some of Ted Nugent's hunting shows.
corax_lives wrote:
NTA. It's one thing her being vegan which is fine. But unless you're leaving out facts that someone asks or shown interest, then no you're not the ah. Sarah can be passionate about it all she wants . But to start trying put her ideals unprompted.. it becomes an issue. She needs to not try to convert people. She might be a new vegan and like new Christians they feel the need to save the world.
It seems unanimously agreed that OP is NTA here, hopefully him and his roommate can come to understand each other instead of playing an ideological tug-of-war.